jefflong.yearzero-第60节

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you　could　trade　for　peas　in　the　pod；　green　and　red　chiles；　ears　of　yellow　and　Indian　corn；　round　cannonballs　of　cantaloupe　that　tasted　like　wet　sugar；　squash；　heads　of　lettuce；　basil；　thyme；　onions。。。and　fat　sticks　of　carrots。　〃Here。〃
　He　helped　Tara　with　the　first　carrot。　Together　they　offered　it　to　the　horse；　and　she　took　it　with　muscular　lips。　Her　big　teeth　munched　it。　She　nuzzled　for　more。　After　that　Tara　didn't　need　his　help。　Horse　and　girl；　they　had　found　each　other。
　〃Should　we　ride　her　a　little？〃
　It　was　inprehensible　to　the　child。　He　might　have　saidlet's　fly。　Nathan　Lee　got　into　the　saddle　first；　then　reached　down　for　Tara。　Not　yet　five；　and　she　must　have　weighed　sixty　pounds；　all　muscle。
　With　his　arms　around　the　child；　Nathan　Lee　nudged　the　horse　to　motion。　The　girl　was　trembling。　〃Should　we　stop？〃　he　asked。
　〃No；〃　she　whispered。
　They　took　a　slow　loop　out　to　the　mesa　rim。　On　the　way　back；　he　showed　her　how　to　hold　the　reins。　They　dismounted。　〃Would　you　like　a　little　more？〃　he　said。
　〃More；〃　she　whispered。
　He　took　the　saddle　off；　and　the　blanket。　He　lifted　Tara　onto　the　broad；　warm　back　and　walked　the　Appaloosa　for　miles。　At　the　end　of　the　day；　he　led　her　to　the　Special　Forces　camp。　〃Can　Tara　e　ride　your　horse　again？〃　he　asked　the　soldiers。
　Tara　was　breathless；　waiting　up　there。
　One　of　them　came　over　and　stroked　the　appaloosa。　〃I　think　that　would　be　a　good　idea。〃　The　soldier　pretended　to　talk　to　the　horse。　〃What　do　you　think？〃
　Tara's　eyes　widened。　The　animal　could　speak？
　Just　then　a　fly　landed　on　the　horse's　nose。　The　Appaloosa　tossed　her　head　up　and　down。　The　answer　was　plain　as　day。　The　little　girl　looked　thunderstruck。　Nathan　Lee　let　her　sit　up　there　for　a　while　longer。　That　night　he　dreamed　of　that　happy　day。
　
　26
　Wolves　and　Lambs
　
　ONEWEEKLATER
　Few　of　the　crucified　men　talked　about　the　manner　of　their　dying　or　what　came　after。　Not　unnaturally；　the　threatened　citizens　of　Los　Alamos　were　burning　to　know　about　it。　They　pestered　Nathan　Lee　on　the　streets；　by　e…mail　or　phone；　asking　him　to　ask　more　about　that　〃death　thing。〃　They　wanted　some　glimpse　of　what　it　was　like；　〃the　king　of　terrors〃　as　the　Bible　put　it；　〃a　little　sleep；　a　little　slumber；　a　little　folding　of　the　hands　for　sleep。〃　Nathan　Lee　dreaded　to　ask；　though。　He　had　passed　among　the　bones。　He　had　heard　them　whistle。
　Over　the　summer　Los　Alamos　had　largely　lost　touch　with　America。　Information　technology　had　not　decayed　limb　by　neat　regional　limb；　as　some　had　predicted。　The　crash　had　been　catastrophic。　One　day　they　had　transmissions　from　St。　George　and　Lincoln　and　Laramie；　frightened　talking　heads；　meandering　video　tours。　The　next；　their　eyes　were　blind。　The　transmissions　just　ceased。　There　were　sporadic　bursts　from　shortwave　guerrillas；　and　the　satellites　were　jam…packed　with　backdated　images　and　data　they　had　yet　to　excavate。　But　it　was　suddenly　like　nightfall　out　there；　as　if　America　had　plunged　into　the　darkness　of　Asia　and　Africa　and　Europe。　Even　so；　Nathan　Lee　clung　to　his　hope。　He　refused　to　believe　silence　meant　emptiness。　People…towns；　enclaves；　tribes…were　in　hiding；　that　was　all。　There　was　life　out　there。　And　his　daughter。　Life；　that　was　the　question　he　wanted　answers　for；　not　death。
　The　few　times　he　did　ask　about　the　clones'　deaths　and　what　lay　beyond；　the　men　would　evade　answering。　〃You　know　as　well　as　me；〃　they　would　say。　It　wasn't　that　they'd　forgotten。　Their　faces　grew　dark。　Their　eyes　smoldered。　They　remembered；　but　did　not　want　to。　With　time；　Nathan　Lee　prehended　that　hanging　from　the　cross　had　been　a　gruesome　humiliation。　No　matter　how　much　agony　they　had　endured　on　the　cross；　it　was　their　memory　of　the　shame　that　still　hurt　them　most。　Naked　and　reviled；　they　had　been　stripped　of　their　reputations；　their　names；　and　their　lands。　Their　families　had　been　damned　by　their　deaths；　and　they　knew　it。　And　so　they　glossed　over　the　dying　part。
　Nathan　Lee　was　struck　by　their　dignity。　As　their　scribe；　he　listened　to　them　dictate　letters　home　about　their　new　life；　and　they　generally　treated　their　rebirth　as　a　grand　achievement；　or　a　fresh　start；　a　new　land；　an　opportunity。　They　viewed　themselves　as　pioneers；　or　at　least　fellow　travelers。　Their　imprisonment　by　strange　demons　was　simply　part　of　the　journey。　It　wouldn't　last　forever。　They　acted　as　if　their　herds　and　orchards　and　businesses　were　still　intact　back　in　the　old　life。　Some　went　into　great　detail　about　how　they　wanted　their　wives　or　brothers　or　sons　to　attend　to　daily　affairs　in　their　absence。　〃Pay　no　more　than　three　shekels；〃　one　instructed　his　wife；　〃and　be　sure　not　to　speak　with　Elias。　I　never　trusted　his　eyes。　And　whatever　you　do；　don't　invite　him　here。〃
　All　day　long；　Nathan　Lee　sat　with　his　back　against　the　tree；　listening　to　their　stories；　taking　notes。　By　the　fifth　week；　he　could　understand　so　much　of　their　language　that　Izzy　was　freed　for　hours　at　a　stretch。　This　suited　Izzy；　who　enjoyed　slumming　among　the　clones。　The　courtyard　would　suddenly　ring　with　laughter；　and　usually　Izzy　was　at　the　center　of　it。　Later　he　would　try　to　explain　the　jokes　to　Nathan　Lee。　Often　they　had　something　to　do　with　talking　fish　or　traveling　salesmen　and　farmer's　daughters；　all　of　which　had　existed　in　one　form　or　another　two　thousand　years　ago。
　Periodically　Nathan　Lee　got　up　to　walk　around　and　stretch　his　muscles。　This　morning　Joshua；　a　slight　man　with　long　fingers　and　toes；　was　describing　his　part　in　a　great　battle。　Mordechai；　an　ugly　man　with　huge　ears；　was　delivering　his　daily　boast　about　seducing　a　Roman　centurion's　wife。　For　anyone　who　would　listen；　he　detailed　her　round　hips　and　her　moans　of　ecstasy。　Micah　was　declaring　his　wealth　once　again；　a　herd　of　sheep　that；　he'd　decided；　must　surely　have　increased　from　fifty　to　five　hundred　by　now。
　〃Weren't　any　of　them　plain　murderers　or　thieves？〃　Nathan　Lee　wondered　to　Izzy。
　〃You　noticed　that；　too？〃　said　Izzy。　〃I've　never　met　so　many　patriots；　lords；　political　prisoners；　and　martyrs　of　the　faith。〃　It　was　Kathmandu　all　over　again；　a　cauldron　of　fictions　and　realities；　disgrace　and　glory。
　Nathan　Lee's　favorites　remained　the　loners　who　kept　to　themselves。　They　acted　as　if　they　had　no　use　for　the　bragging；　nor　for　sending　letters。　They　stood　by　the　fire；　ate　the　food；　circled　the　yard；　but　rarely　talked。　Among　these　was　the　fugitive。　In　Nathan　Lee's　opinion；　he　had　the　most　to　talk　about；　for　he　had　glimpsed　the　world　outside　their　prison。　But　so　far　he　had　volunteered　only　his　name；　Ben。　Though　he　never　spoke　about　his　escape；　the　other　prisoners　had　figured　out　that　much　about　him。　It　was　written　all　over　his　flesh。
　Escape　was　being　a　popular　topic。　Eyes　were　constantly　hunting　along　the　tops　of　the　walls。　Unaware　that　Nathan　Lee　and　Izzy　were；　in　effect；　their　jailers；　and　that　the　yard　was　wired　with　microphones；　they　openly　discussed　ways　of　getting　out。　Nathan　Lee　discovered　that　John's　picture　of　a　ship　disguised　deep　grooves　that　could　be　used　for　footholds。
　One　afternoon　a　small　delegation　approached　Ben　like　supplicants；　and　Nathan　Lee　roamed　closer；　curious。　They　addressed　the　man　with　respect；　asmaal…paa…naa；　or　teacher。　〃What　is　it　like　beyond　the　walls？〃　they　asked　him。
　〃There　is　a　city。　A　metal　city。　Then　there　is　the　wilderness；〃　Ben　gruffly　answered。
　〃Is　there　water？　Are　their　wolves？〃
　〃It　is　a　dead　land；〃　he　answered。　〃Even　the　trees　are　dead。〃
　〃Are　there　villages？〃
　〃All　dead。〃
　〃We're　making　preparations；〃　they　invited　him。
　〃What　would　you　do　out　there？〃
　〃Find　our　homes；　what　else？〃
　He　snorted　at　them。
　〃Help　us；maal…paa…naa。〃
　He　turned　his　back　to　them　and　walked　away。
　Nathan　Lee　explained　to　the　Captain　about　the　escape　talk；　just　in　case。　He　didn't　want　the　guards　overreacting。　〃It's　only　talk；〃　he　said；　〃and　they　trust　me。　If　anything　develops；　I'll　hear　about　it。　We　can　head　it　off　then。〃
　The　Captain　was　not　alarmed。　〃Nice　to　see　a　bit　of　starch　in　them；〃　he　said。
　　
　MIRANDA　HEARD　ABOUTthe　escape　plotting。　She　brought　it　up　one　evening　near　the　edge　of　the　roof　of　Alpha　Lab。　This　had　bee　their　getaway；　a　place　to　share　a　quick　picnic；　then　return　to　work。　From　up　here；　sitting　on　an　old；　cheap　Indian　blanket　spread　on　the　gravel；　they　had　a　view　to　the　west　of　the　far　valley　and　north　of　the　lights　of　Los　Alamos　across　the　bridge。　Usually　they　grabbed　whatever　was　at　hand　on　their　way　to　the　stairs。　Tonight　they　were　eating　apples　and　peanut　butter。
　〃But　what　if　they　really　do　try　something？〃　Miranda　said。　〃You　weren't　here　when　Ben　escaped。　It　put　the　whole　city　in　a　panic。　And　he　nearly　died。〃
　〃Don't　worry。　The　lone　bolt　for　freedom　is　one　thing；　a　matter　of　desperation　or　sudden　chance。　A　large…scale　breakout　is　very　different。　It　takes　a　long　time　to　e　together。　It　rarely　happens。〃
　He　told　her　about　a　group　of　Maoists　who　had　plotted　to　escape　from　Badrighot；　his　Kathmandu　jail。　〃They　plotted；〃　he　said。　〃And　plotted　and　plotted。　It　went　on　for　months。　The　conspirators　came　up　with　an　elaborate　plan。　But　the　plan　was　useless　without　faith。　You　have　to　believe　freedom　is　possible　in　the　first　place。　In　the　case　of　the　Maoists；　they　never　broke　the　mental　chains。　They　never　did　go　for　the　wall。　And　the　clones　won't　either。〃
　〃But