cranford(克兰弗德)-第47节
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She fell off into a soft reverie about Mr Holbrook； and I did not
interrupt her； I was so busy maturing a plan I had had in my mind for
some days； but which this threatened failure of the bank had brought to a
crisis。 That night； after Miss Matty went to bed； I treacherously lighted
the candle again； and sat down in the drawing…room to compose a letter
to the Aga Jenkyns； a letter which should affect him if he were Peter； and
yet seem a mere statement of dry facts if he were a stranger。 The
church clock pealed out two before I had done。
The next morning news came； both official and otherwise； that the
Town and County Bank had stopped payment。 Miss Matty was ruined。
She tried to speak quietly to me； but when she came to the actual fact
that she would have but about five shillings a week to live upon； she
could not restrain a few tears。
〃I am not crying for myself； dear；〃 said she； wiping them away； 〃I
believe I am crying for the very silly thought of how my mother would
grieve if she could know； she always cared for us so much more than for
herself。 But many a poor person has less； and I am not very
extravagant； and； thank God； when the neck of mutton； and Martha's
wages； and the rent are paid； I have not a farthing owing。 Poor Martha！
I think she'll be sorry to leave me。〃
Miss Matty smiled at me through her tears； and she would fain have
had me see only the smile； not the tears。
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CHAPTER XIV … FRIENDS IN
NEED
IT was an example to me； and I fancy it might be to many others； to
see how immediately Miss Matty set about the retrenchment which she
knew to be right under her altered circumstances。 While she went
down to speak to Martha； and break the intelligence to her； I stole out
with my letter to the Aga Jenkyns； and went to the signor's lodgings to
obtain the exact address。 I bound the signora to secrecy； and indeed
her military manners had a degree of shortness and reserve in them
which made her always say as little as possible； except when under the
pressure of strong excitement。 Moreover （which made my secret
doubly sure）； the signor was now so far recovered as to be looking
forward to travelling and conjuring again in the space of a few days；
when he； his wife； and little Phoebe would leave Cranford。 Indeed； I
found him looking over a great black and red placard； in which the
Signor Brunoni's accomplishments were set forth； and to which only the
name of the town where he would next display them was wanting。 He
and his wife were so much absorbed in deciding where the red letters
would come in with most effect （it might have been the Rubric for that
matter）； that it was some time before I could get my question asked
privately； and not before I had given several decisions； the which I
questioned afterwards with equal wisdom of sincerity as soon as the
signor threw in his doubts and reasons on the important subject。 At last
I got the address； spelt by sound； and very queer it looked。 I dropped it
in the post on my way home； and then for a minute I stood looking at the
wooden pane with a gaping slit which divided me from the letter but a
moment ago in my hand。 It was gone from me like life； never to be
recalled。 It would get tossed about on the sea； and stained with sea…
waves perhaps； and be carried among palm…trees； and scented with all
tropical fragrance； the little piece of paper； but an hour ago so familiar
and commonplace； had set out on its race to the strange wild countries
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beyond the Ganges！ But I could not afford to lose much time on this
speculation。 I hastened home； that Miss Matty might not miss me。
Martha opened the door to me； her face swollen with crying。 As soon as
she saw me she burst out afresh； and taking hold of my arm she pulled
me in； and banged the door to； in order to ask me if indeed it was all true
that Miss Matty had been saying。
〃I'll never leave her！ No； I won't。 I telled her so； and said I could
not think how she could find in her heart to give me warning。 I could
not have had the face to do it； if I'd been her。 I might ha' been just as
good for nothing as Mrs Fitz…Adam's Rosy； who struck for wages after
living seven years and a half in one place。 I said I was not one to go
and serve Mammon at that rate； that I knew when I'd got a good missus；
if she didn't know when she'd got a good servant〃 …
〃But； Martha；〃 said I； cutting in while she wiped her eyes。
〃Don't； 'but Martha' me；〃 she replied to my deprecatory tone。
〃Listen to reason〃 …
〃I'll not listen to reason；〃 she said； now in full possession of her
voice； which had been rather choked with sobbing。 〃Reason always
means what someone else has got to say。 Now I think what I've got to
say is good enough reason； but reason or not； I'll say it； and I'll stick to it。
I've money in the Savings Bank； and I've a good stock of clothes； and
I'm not going to leave Miss Matty。 No； not if she gives me warning
every hour in the day！〃
She put her arms akimbo； as much as to say she defied me； and；
indeed； I could hardly tell how to begin to remonstrate with her； so much
did I feel that Miss Matty； in her increasing infirmity； needed the
attendance of this kind and faithful woman。
〃Well〃 … said I at last。
〃I'm thankful you begin with 'well！' If you'd have begun with 'but；'
as you did afore； I'd not ha' listened to you。 Now you may go on。〃
〃I know you would be a great loss to Miss Matty； Martha〃 …
〃I telled her so。 A loss she'd never cease to be sorry for；〃 broke in
Martha triumphantly。
〃Still； she will have so little … so very little … to live upon； that I don't
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see just now how she could find you food … she will even be pressed for
her own。 I tell you this； Martha； because I feel you are like a friend to
dear Miss Matty； but you know she might not like to have it spoken
about。〃
Apparently this was even a blacker view of the subject than Miss
Matty had presented to her； for Martha just sat down on the first chair
that came to hand； and cried out loud （we had been standing in the
kitchen）。
At last she put her apron down； and looking me earnestly in the face；
asked； 〃Was that the reason Miss Matty wouldn't order a pudding to…day？
She said she had no great fancy for sweet things； and you and she would
just have a mutton chop。 But I'll be up to her。 Never you tell； but I'll
make her a pudding； and a pudding she'll like； too； and I'll pay for it
myself； so mind you see she eats it。 Many a one has been comforted in
their sorrow by seeing a good dish come upon the table。〃
I was rather glad that Martha's energy had taken the immediate and
practical direction of pudding…making； for it staved off the quarrelsome
discussion as to whether
