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第94节

[科幻]宿主-第94节

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 The helicopter; Brandt’s distrustful watch; these were not really so bad。 On an ordinary day—if there 
was really such a thing anymore—either one of these might have seemed agonizing。 Today; they were 
nothing。

 By noon; Doc had given Walter the last of the brandy。 It seemed like only minutes later that Walter was 
writhing; moaning; and gasping for breath。 His fingers bruised and chafed mine; but if I ever pulled away; 
his moans turned to shrill screams。 I ducked out once to use the latrine; Brandt followed me; which made 
Ian feel like he had to e; too。 By the time we got back—after nearly running the whole 
way—Walter’s screams no longer sounded human。 Doc’s face was hollow with echoed agony。 Walter 
quieted after I spoke to him for a moment; letting him think his wife was near。 It was an easy lie; a kind 
one。 Brandt made little noises of irritation; but I knew that he was wrong to be upset。 Nothing mattered 
beside Walter’s pain。

 The whimpers and the writhing continued; though; and Brandt paced back and forth at the other end of 
the room; trying to be as far from the sound as possible。

 Jamie came looking for me; bringing food enough for four; when the light was growing orangey 
overhead。 I wouldn’t let him stay; I made Ian take him back to the kitchen to eat; made Ian promise to 
watch him all night so he wouldn’t sneak back here。 Walter couldn’t help shrieking when his twisting 
moved his broken leg; and the sound of it was nearly unbearable。 Jamie shouldn’t have this night burned 
into his memory the way it would surely be burned into Doc’s and mine。 Perhaps Brandt’s as well; 
though he did what he could to ignore Walter; plugging his ears and humming a dissonant tune。

 Doc did not try to distance himself from Walter’s hideous suffering; instead; he suffered with him。 
Walter’s cries carved deep lines in Doc’s face; like claws raking his skin。

 It was strange to see such depths of passion in a human; particularly Doc。 I couldn’t look at him the 
same way after watching him live Walter’s pain。 So great was his passion; he seemed to bleed 
internally with it。 As I watched; it became impossible to believe that Doc was a cruel person; the man 
simply could not be a torturer。 I tried to remember what had been said to found my conjectures—had 
anyone made the accusation outright? I didn’t think so。 I must have jumped to false conclusions in my 
terror。

 I doubted I could ever mistrust Doc again after this nightmarish day。 However; I would always find his 
hospital a horrible place。

 When the last of the daylight disappeared; so did the helicopter。 We sat in the darkness; not daring to 
turn on even the dim blue light。 It took a few hours before any of us would believe the hunt was over。 
Brandt was the first to accept it; he’d had enough of the hospital; too。

 “Makes sense for it to give up;” he muttered; edging out the exit。 “Nothing to see at night。 I’ll just take 

 

 Doc didn’t respond; didn’t even look at the sullen man as he left。

 “Make it stop; Gladdie; make it stop!” Walter begged me。 I wiped the sweat from his face while he 

crushed my hand。

 Time seemed to slow down and stop; the black night felt unending。 Walter’s screams got more and 
more frequent; more and more excruciating。

 Melanie was far away; knowing she could do nothing useful。 I would have hidden; too; if Walter hadn’t 

needed me。 I was all alone in my head—exactly what I had once wanted。 It made me feel lost。

 Eventually; a dim gray light started to creep in through the high vents overhead。 I was hovering on the 
edge of sleep; Walter’s moans and screams keeping me from sinking under。 I could hear Doc snoring 

behind me。 I was glad that he’d been able to escape for a little while。

 I didn’t hear Jared e in。 I was mumbling weak assurances; barely coherent; trying to calm Walter。

 “I’m here; I’m here;” I murmured as he cried out his wife’s name。 “Shh; it’s okay。” The words were 

meaningless。 It was something to say; though; and it did seem that my voice calmed the worst of his cries。 
I don’t know how long Jared watched me with Walter before I realized he was there。 It must have been 

a while。 I was sure his first reaction would be anger; but when I heard him speak; his voice was cool。

 “Doc;” he said; and I heard the cot behind me shake。 “Doc; wake up。”

 I jerked my hand free; whirling; disoriented; to see the face that went with the unmistakable voice。

 His eyes were on me as he shook the sleeping man’s shoulder。 They were impossible to read in the dim 

light。 His face had no expression at all。

 Melanie jolted into awareness。 She pored over his features; trying to read the thoughts behind the mask。

 “Gladdie! Don’t leave! Don’t!” Walter’s screech had Doc bolting upright; nearly capsizing his cot。

 I spun back to Walter; shoving my sore hand into his searching fingers。

 “Shhh; shhh! Walter; I’m here。 I won’t leave。 I won’t; I promise。”

 He quieted down; whimpering like a small child。 I wiped the damp cloth over his forehead; his sob 

hitched and turned into a sigh。

 “What’s that about?” Jared murmured behind me。

 “She’s the best painkiller I’ve been able to find;” Doc said wearily。

 “Well; I’ve found you something better than a tame Seeker。”

 My stomach knotted; and Melanie hissed in my head。So stupidly; blindly stubborn! she growled。He 

wouldn’t believe you if you told him the sun sets in the west。 

 

 “Morphine—there’s not much。 I would have gotten here sooner if the Seeker hadn’t pinned me down 
out there。” 
Doc was instantly in action。 I heard him rustling through something papery; and he crowed in delight。 

“Jared; you’re the miracle man!” 
“Doc; just a sec…” 
But Doc was at my side already; his haggard face alight with anticipation。 His hands were busy with a 

small syringe。 He stuck the tiny needle into the crease at Walter’s elbow; on the arm that was attached to 

me。 I turned my face away。 It seemed so horribly invasive to stab something through his skin。 
I couldn’t argue with the results; though。 Within half a minute; Walter’s entire body relaxed; melting into 
a pile of loose flesh against the thin mattress。 His breathing went from harsh and urgent to whispery and 
even。 His hand relaxed; freeing mine。

 I massaged my left hand with my right; trying to bring the blood back to my fingertips。 Little prickles 
followed the flow of blood under my skin。

 “Uh; Doc; there really isn’t enough for that;” Jared murmured。 
I looked up from Walter’s face; peaceful at last。 Jared had his back to me; but I could see the surprise in 
Doc’s expression。


 “Enough for what? I’m not going to save this for a rainy day; Jared。 I’m sure we’ll wish we had it again; 


and too soon; but I’m not going to let Walter scream in agony while I have a way to help him!” 
“That’s not what I meant;” Jared said。 He spoke the way he did when he’d already thought about 
something long and hard。 Slow and even; like Walter’s breath。


 Doc frowned; confused。 
“There’s enough to stop the pain for maybe three or four days; that’s all;” Jared said。 “If you give it to 


him in doses。” 
I didn’t understand what Jared was saying; but Doc did。 
“Ah;” he sighed。 He turned to look at Walter again; and I saw a rim of fresh tears start to pool above his 


lower lids。 He opened his mouth to speak; but nothing came out。


 I wanted to know what they were talking about; but Jared’s presence made me silent; brought back the 
reserve I rarely felt the need for anymore。 
“You can’t save him。 You can only save him pain; Doc。” 
“I know;” Doc said。 His voice broke; like he was holding back a sob。 “You’re right。” 
What’s going on?I asked。 As long as Melanie was going to be around; I might as well make use of her。 

 

 My gasp sounded loud in the quiet room; but it was really just a breath。 I didn’t look up to see how the 
two healthy men would react。 My own tears pooled as I leaned over Walter’s pillow。

 No;I thought;no。 Not yet。 No。

 You’d rather he died screaming?

 I just… I can’t stand the… finality。 It’s so absolute。 I’ll never see my friend again。

 How many of your other friends have you gone back to visit; Wanderer?

 I’ve never had friends like this before。

 My friends on other planets were all blurred together in my head; the souls were so similar; almost 
interchangeable in some ways。 Walter was distinctly himself。 When he was gone; there would be no one 
who could fill his place。

 I cradled Walter’s head in my arms and let my tears fall onto his skin。 I tried to stifle my crying; but it 
made its way out regardless; a keening rather than sobs。

 I know。 Another first;Melanie whispered; and there was passion in her tone。 passion for 
me—that was a first; too。

 “Wanda?” Doc asked。

 I just shook my head; not able to answer。

 “I think you’ve been here too long;” he said。 I felt his hand; light and warm; on my shoulder。 “You 
should take a break。”

 I shook my head again; still keening softly。 
“You’re worn out;” he said。 “Go c

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