the woman in the alcove-第21节

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the　mind　beneath　to　harbor　such　doubts　as　were　shown　in　the　warning　I　had　ascribed　to　her；　and　vain　efforts　to　explain　by　any　other　hypothesis　than　that　of　guilt；　the　extraordinary　evidence　which　linked　this　man　of　great　affairs　and　the　loftiest　repute　to　a　crime　involving　both　theft　and　murder。

Nor　did　the　struggle　end　that　night。　It　was　renewed　with　still　greater　positiveness　the　next　day；　as　I　witnessed　the　glances　which　from　time　to　time　passed　between　this　father　and　daughter；glances　full　of　doubt　and　question　on　both　sides；　but　not　exactly　such　doubt　or　such　question　as　my　suspicions　called　for。　Or　so　I　thought；　and　spent　another　day　or　two　hesitating　very　much　over　my　duty；　when；　coming　unexpectedly　upon　Mr。　Grey　one　evening；　I　felt　all　my　doubts　revive　in　view　of　the　extraordinary　expression　of　dreadI　might　with　still　greater　truth　say　fearwhich　informed　his　features　and　made　them；　to　my　unaccustomed　eyes；　almost　unrecognizable。

He　was　sitting　at　his　desk　in　reverie　over　some　papers　which　he　seemed　not　to　have　touched　for　hours；　and　when；　at　some　movement　I　made；　he　started　up　and　met　my　eye；　I　could　swear　that　his　cheek　was　pale；　the　firm　carriage　of　his　body　shaken；　and　the　whole　man　a　victim　to　some　strong　and　secret　apprehension　he　vainly　sought　to　hide。　when　I　ventured　to　tell　him　what　I　wanted；　he　made　an　effort　and　pulled　himself　together；　but　I　had　seen　him　with　his　mask　off；　and　his　usually　calm　visage　and　self…possessed　mien　could　not　again　deceive　me。

My　duties　kept　me　mainly　at　Miss　Grey's　bedside；　but　I　had　been　provided　with　a　little　room　across　the　hall；　and　to　this　room　I　retired　very　soon　after　this；　for　rest　and　a　necessary　understanding　with　myself。

For；　in　spite　of　this　experience　and　my　now　settled　convictions；　my　purpose　required　whetting。　The　indescribable　charm；　the　extreme　refinement　and　nobility　of　manner　observable　in　both　Mr。　Grey　and　his　daughter　were　producing　their　effect。　I　felt　guilty；　constrained。　whatever　my　convictions；　the　impetus　to　act　was　leaving　me。　How　could　I　recover　it？　By　thinking　of　Anson　Durand　and　his　present　disgraceful　position。

Anson　Durand！　Oh；　how　the　feeling　surged　up　in　my　breast　as　that　name　slipped　from　my　lips　on　crossing　the　threshold　of　my　little　room！　Anson　Durand；　whom　I　believed　innocent；　whom　I　loved；　but　whom　I　was　betraying　with　every　moment　of　hesitation　in　which　I　allowed　myself　to　indulge！　what　if　the　Honorable　Mr。　Grey　is　an　eminent　statesman；　a　dignified；　scholarly；　and　to　all　appearance；　high…minded　man？　what　if　my　patient　is　sweet；　dove…eyed　and　affectionate？　Had　not　Anson　qualities　as　excellent　in　their　way；　rights　as　certain；　and　a　hold　upon　myself　superior　to　any　claims　which　another　might　advance？　Drawing　a　much…crumpled　little　note　from　my　pocket；　I　eagerly　read　it。　It　was　the　only　one　I　had　of　his　writing；　the　only　letter　he　had　ever　written　me。　I　had　already　re…read　it　a　hundred　times；　but　as　I　once　more　repeated　to　myself　its　well…known　lines；　I　felt　my　heart　grow　strong　and　fixed　in　the　determination　which　had　brought　me　into　this　family。

Restoring　the　letter　to　its　place；　I　opened　my　gripsack　and　from　its　inmost　recesses　drew　forth　an　object　which　I　had　no　sooner　in　hand　than　a　natural　sense　of　disquietude　led　me　to　glance　apprehensively；　first　at　the　door；　then　at　the　window；　though　I　had　locked　the　one　and　shaded　the　other。　It　seemed　as　if　some　other　eye　besides　my　own　must　be　gazing　at　what　I　held　so　gingerly　in　hand；　that　the　walls　were　watching　me；　if　nothing　else；　and　the　sensation　this　produced　was　so　exactly　like　that　of　guilt　（or　what　I　imagined　to　be　guilt）；　that　I　was　forced　to　repeat　once　more　to　myself　that　it　was　not　a　good　man's　overthrow　I　sought；　or　even　a　bad　man's　immunity　from　punishment；　but　the　truth；　the　absolute　truth。　No　shame　could　equal　that　which　I　should　feel　if；　by　any　over…delicacy　now；　I　failed　to　save　the　man　who　trusted　me。

The　article　which　I　heldhave　you　guessed　it？was　the　stiletto　with　which　Mrs。　Fairbrother　had　been　killed。　It　had　been　intrusted　to　me　by　the　police　for　a　definite　purpose。　The　time　for　testing　that　purpose　had　come；　or　so　nearly　come；　that　I　felt　I　must　be　thinking　about　the　necessary　ways　and　means。

Unwinding　the　folds　of　tissue　paper　in　which　the　stiletto　was　wrapped；　I　scrutinized　the　weapon　very　carefully。　Hitherto；　I　had　seen　only　pictures　of　it；　now；　I　had　the　article　itself　in　my　hand。　It　was　not　a　natural　one　for　a　young　woman　to　hold；　a　woman　whose　taste　ran　more　toward　healing　than　inflicting　wounds；　but　I　forced　myself　to　forget　why　the　end　of　its　blade　was　rusty；　and　looked　mainly　at　the　devices　which　ornamented　the　handle。　I　had　not　been　mistaken　in　them。　They　belonged　to　the　house　of　Grey；　and　to　none　other。　It　was　a　legitimate　inquiry　I　had　undertaken。　However　the　matter　ended；　I　should　always　have　these　historic　devices　for　my　excuse。

My　plan　was　to　lay　this　dagger　on　Mr。　Grey's　desk　at　a　moment　when　he　would　be　sure　to　see　it　and　I　to　see　him。　If　he　betrayed　a　guilty　knowledge　of　this　fatal　steel；　if；　unconscious　of　my　presence；　he　showed　surprise　and　apprehension；then　we　should　know　how　to　proceed；　justice　would　be　loosed　from　constraint　and　the　police　feel　at　liberty　to　approach　him。　It　was　a　delicate　task；　this。　I　realized　how　delicate；　when　I　had　thrust　the　stiletto　out　of　sight　under　my　nurse's　apron　and　started　to　cross　the　hall。　Should　I　find　the　library　clear？　Would　the　opportunity　be　given　me　to　approach　his　desk；　or　should　I　have　to　carry　this　guilty　witness　of　a　world…famous　crime　on　into　Miss　Grey's　room；　and　with　its　unholy　outline　pressing　a　semblance　of　itself　upon　my　breast；　sit　at　that　innocent　pillow；　meet　those　innocent　eyes；　and　answer　the　gentle　inquiries　which　now　and　then　fell　from　the　sweetest　lips　I　have　ever　seen　smile　into　the　face　of　a　lonely；　preoccupied　stranger？

The　arrangement　of　the　rooms　was　such　as　made　it　necessary　for　me　to　pass　through　this　sittting…room　in　order　to　reach　my　patient's　bedroom。

With　careful　tread；　so　timed　as　not　to　appear　stealthy；　I　accordingly　advanced　and　pushed　open　the　door。　The　room　was　empty。　Mr。　Grey　was　still　with　his　daughter　and　I　could　cross　the　floor　without　fear。　But　never　had　I　entered　upon　a　task　requiring　more　courage　or　one　more　obnoxious　to　my　natural　instincts。　I　hated　each　step　I　took；　but　I　loved　the　man　for　whom　I　took　those　steps；　and　moved　resolutely　on。　Only；　as　I　reached　the　chair　in　which　Mr。　Grey　was　accustomed　to　sit；　I　found　that　it　was　easier　to　plan　an　action　than　to　carry　it　out。　Home　life　and　the　domestic　virtues　had　always　appealed　to　me　more　than　a　man's　greatness。　The　position　which　this　man　held　in　his　own　country；　his　usefulness　there；　even　his　prestige　as　statesman　and　scholar；　were　facts；　but　very　dreamy　facts；　to　me；　while　his　feelings　as　a　father；　the　place　he　held　in　his　daughter's　heartthese　were　real　to　me；　these　I　could　understand；　and　it　was　of　these　and　not　of　his　place　as　a　man；　that　this　his　favorite　seat　spoke　to　me。　How　often　had　I　beheld　him　sit　by　the　hour　with　his　eye　on　the　door　behind　which　his　one　darling　lay　ill！　Even　now；　it　was　easy　for　me　to　recall　his　face　as　I　had　sometimes　caught　a　glimpse　of　it　through　the　crack　of　the　suddenly　opened　door；　and　I　felt　my　breast　heave　and　my　hand　falter　as　I　drew　forth　the　stiletto　and　moved　to　place　it　where　his　eye　would　fall　upon　it　on　his　leaving　his　daughter's　bedside。

But　my　hand　returned　quickly　to　my　breast　and　fell　hack　again　empty。　A　pile　of　letters　lay　before　me　on　the　open　lid　of　the　desk。　The　top　one　was　addressed　to　me　with　the　word　〃Important〃　written　in　the　corner。　I　did　not　know　the　writing；　but　I　felt　that　I　should　open　and　read　this　letter　before　committing　myself　or　those　who　stood　back　of　me　to　this　desperate　undertaking。

Glancing　behind　me　and　seeing　that　the　door　into　Miss　Grey's　room　was　ajar；　I　caught　up　this　letter　and　rushed　with　it　back　into　my　own　room。　As　I　surmised；　it　was　from　the　inspector；　and　as　I　read　it　I　realized　that　I　had　received　it　not　one　moment　too　soon。　In　language　purposely　non…committal；　but　of　a　meaning　not　to　be　mistaken；　it　advised　me　that　some　unforeseen　facts　had　come　to　light　which　altered　all　former　suspicions　and　made　the　little　surprise　I　had　planned　no　longer　necessary。

There　was　no　allusion　to　Mr。　Durand　but　the　final　sentence　ran：

〃Drop　all　care　and　give　your　undivided　attention　to　your　patient。〃



XIII

THE　MISSING　RECOMMENDATION

My　patient　slept　that　night；　but　I　did　not。　The　shock　given　by　this　sudden　cry　of　Halt！　at　the　very　moment　I　was　about　to　make　my　great　move；　the　uncertainty　as　to　what　it　meant　and　my　doubt　of　its　effect　upon　Mr。　Durand's　position；　put　me　on　the　anxious　seat　and　kept　my　thoughts　fully　occupied　till　morning。

I　was　very　tired　and　must　have　shown　it；　when；　with　the　first　rays　of　a　very　meager　sun；　Miss　Grey　softly　unclosed　her　eyes　and　found　me　looking　at　her；　for　her　smile　had　a　sweet　compassion　in　it；　and　she　said　as　she　pressed　my　hand：

〃You　must　have　watched　me　all　night。　I　never　saw　any　one　look　so　tired；or　so　good；〃　she　softly　finished。

I　had　rather　she　had　not　uttered　that　last　phrase。　It　did　not　fit　me　at　the　moment；did　not　fit　me；　perhaps；　at　any　time。　Good！　I！　when　my　tho