the miscellaneous writings and speeches-3-第5节

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ge　in　which　he　described　them　has　strangely　misled　all　his　biographers　except　Mr　Southey。　　It　has　long　been　an　ordinary　practice　with　pious　writers　to　cite　Bunyan　as　an　instance　of　the　supernatural　power　of　divine　grace　to　rescue　the　human　soul　from　the　lowest　depths　of　wickedness。　　He　is　called　in　one　book　the　most　notorious　of　profligates；　in　another；　the　brand　plucked　from　the　burning。　　He　is　designated　in　Mr　Ivimey's　History　of　the　Baptists　as　the　depraved　Bunyan；　the　wicked　tinker　of　Elstow。　　Mr　Ryland；　a　man　once　of　great　note　among　the　Dissenters；　breaks　out　into　the　following　rhapsody：〃No　man　of　common　sense　and　common　integrity　can　deny　that　Bunyan　was　a　practical　atheist；　a　worthless　contemptible　infidel；　a　vile　rebel　to　God　and　goodness；　a　common　profligate；　a　soul…despising；　a　soul…murdering；　a　soul…　damning；　thoughtless　wretch　as　could　exist　on　the　face　of　the　earth。　　Now　be　astonished；　O　heavens；　to　eternity！　and　wonder；　O　earth　and　hell！　while　time　endures。　　Behold　this　very　man　become　a　miracle　of　mercy；　a　mirror　of　wisdom；　goodness；　holiness；　truth；　and　love。〃　　But　whoever　takes　the　trouble　to　examine　the　evidence　will　find　that　the　good　men　who　wrote　this　had　been　deceived　by　a　phraseology　which；　as　they　had　been　hearing　it　and　using　it　all　their　lives；　they　ought　to　have　understood　better。　　There　cannot　be　a　greater　mistake　than　to　infer；　from　the　strong　expressions　in　which　a　devout　man　bemoans　his　exceeding　sinfulness；　that　he　has　led　a　worse　life　than　his　neighbours。　　Many　excellent　persons；　whose　moral　character　from　boyhood　to　old　age　has　been　free　from　any　stain　discernible　to　their　fellow…　creatures；　have；　in　their　autobiographies　and　diaries；　applied　to　themselves；　and　doubtless　with　sincerity；　epithets　as　severe　as　could　be　applied　to　Titus　Oates　or　Mrs　Brownrigg。　　It　is　quite　certain　that　Bunyan　was；　at　eighteen；　what；　in　any　but　the　most　austerely　puritanical　circles；　would　have　been　considered　as　a　young　man　of　singular　gravity　and　innocence。　　Indeed；　it　may　be　remarked　that　he；　like　many　other　penitents　who；　in　general　terms；　acknowledged　themselves　to　have　been　the　worst　of　mankind；　fired　up　and　stood　vigorously　on　his　defence；　whenever　any　particular　charge　was　brought　against　him　by　others。　　He　declares；　it　is　true；　that　he　had　let　loose　the　reins　on　the　neck　of　his　lusts；　that　he　had　delighted　in　all　transgressions　against　the　divine　law；　and　that　he　had　been　the　ringleader　of　the　youth　of　Elstow　in　all　manner　of　vice。　　But；　when　those　who　wished　him　ill　accused　him　of　licentious　amours；　he　called　on　God　and　the　angels　to　attest　his　purity。　　No　woman；　he　said；　in　heaven；　earth；　or　hell；　could　charge　him　with　having　ever　made　any　improper　advances　to　her。　　Not　only　had　he　been　strictly　faithful　to　his　wife；　but　he　had　even　before　his　marriage；　been　perfectly　spotless。　　It　does　not　appear　from　his　own　confessions；　or　from　the　railings　of　his　enemies；　that　he　ever　was　drunk　in　his　life。　　One　bad　habit　he　contracted；　that　of　using　profane　language；　but　he　tells　us　that　a　single　reproof　cured　him　so　effectually　that　he　never　offended　again。　　The　worst　that　can　be　laid　to　the　charge　of　this　poor　youth；　whom　it　has　been　the　fashion　to　represent　as　the　most　desperate　of　reprobates；　as　a　village　Rochester；　is　that　he　had　a　great　liking　for　some　diversions；　quite　harmless　in　themselves；　but　condemned　by　the　rigid　precisians　among　whom　he　lived；　and　for　whose　opinion　he　had　a　great　respect。　　The　four　chief　sins　of　which　he　was　guilty　were　dancing；　ringing　the　bells　of　the　parish　church；　playing　at　tipcat；　and　reading　the　history　of　Sir　Bevis　of　Southampton。　　A　rector　of　the　school　of　Laud　would　have　held　such　a　young　man　up　to　the　whole　parish　as　a　model。　　But　Bunyan's　notions　of　good　and　evil　had　been　learned　in　a　very　different　school；　and　he　was　made　miserable　by　the　conflict　between　his　tastes　and　his　scruples。　When　he　was　about　seventeen；　the　ordinary　course　of　his　life　was　interrupted　by　an　event　which　gave　a　lasting　colour　to　his　thoughts。　　He　enlisted　in　the　parliamentary　army；　and　served　during　the　decisive　campaign　of　1645。　　All　that　we　know　of　his　military　career　is　that；　at　the　siege　of　Leicester；　one　of　his　comrades；　who　had　taken　his　post；　was　killed　by　a　shot　from　the　town。　　Bunyan　ever　after　considered　himself　as　having　been　saved　from　death　by　the　special　interference　of　Providence。　　It　may　be　observed　that　his　imagination　was　strongly　impressed　by　the　glimpse　which　he　had　caught　of　the　pomp　of　war。　　To　the　last　he　loved　to　draw　his　illustrations　of　sacred　things　from　camps　and　fortresses；　from　guns；　drums；　trumpets；　flags　of　truce；　and　regiments　arrayed；　each　under　its　own　banner。　　His　Greatheart；　his　Captain　Boanerges；　and　his　Captain　Credence；　are　evidently　portraits；　of　which　the　originals　were　among　those　martial　saints　who　fought　and　expounded　in　Fairfax's　army。　In　a　few　months　Bunyan　returned　home　and　married。　　His　wife　had　some　pious　relations；　and　brought　him　as　her　only　portion　some　pious　books。　　And　now　his　mind；　excitable　by　nature；　very　imperfectly　disciplined　by　education；　and　exposed；　without　any　protection；　to　the　infectious　virulence　of　the　enthusiasm　which　was　then　epidemic　in　England；　began　to　be　fearfully　disordered。　　In　outward　things　he　soon　became　a　strict　Pharisee。　　He　was　constant　in　attendance　at　prayers　and　sermons。　　His　favourite　amusements　were　one　after　another　relinquished；　though　not　without　many　painful　struggles。　　In　the　middle　of　a　game　at　tipcat　he　paused；　and　stood　staring　wildly　upwards　with　his　stick　in　his　hand。　　He　had　heard　a　voice　asking　him　whether　he　would　leave　his　sins　and　go　to　heaven；　or　keep　his　sins　and　go　to　hell；　and　he　had　seen　an　awful　countenance　frowning　on　him　from　the　sky。　　The　odious　vice　of　bellringing　he　renounced；　but　he　still　for　a　time　ventured　to　go　to　the　church　tower　and　look　on　while　others　pulled　the　ropes。　　But　soon　the　thought　struck　him　that；　if　he　persisted　in　such　wickedness；　the　steeple　would　fall　on　his　head；　and　he　fled　in　terror　from　the　accursed　place。　　To　give　up　dancing　on　the　village　green　was　still　harder；　and　some　months　elapsed　before　he　had　the　fortitude　to　part　with　this　darling　sin。　　When　this　last　sacrifice　had　been　made；　he　was；　even　when　tried　by　the　maxims　of　that　austere　time；　faultless。　　All　Elstow　talked　of　him　as　an　eminently　pious　youth。　　But　his　own　mind　was　more　unquiet　than　ever。　　Having　nothing　more　to　do　in　the　way　of　visible　reformation；　yet　finding　in　religion　no　pleasures　to　supply　the　place　of　the　juvenile　amusements　which　he　had　relinquished；　he　began　to　apprehend　that　he　lay　under　some　special　malediction；　and　he　was　tormented　by　a　succession　of　fantasies　which　seemed　likely　to　drive　him　to　suicide　or　to　Bedlam。　At　one　time　he　took　it　into　his　head　that　all　persons　of　Israelite　blood　would　be　saved；　and　tried　to　make　out　that　he　partook　of　that　blood；　but　his　hopes　were　speedily　destroyed　by　his　father；　who　seems　to　have　had　no　ambition　to　be　regarded　as　a　Jew。　At　another　time　Bunyan　was　disturbed　by　a　strange　dilemma：　　〃If　I　have　not　faith；　I　am　lost；　if　I　have　faith；　I　can　work　miracles。〃　　He　was　tempted　to　cry　to　the　puddles　between　Elstow　and　Bedford；　〃Be　ye　dry；〃　and　to　stake　his　eternal　hopes　on　the　event。　Then　he　took　up　a　notion　that　the　day　of　grace　for　Bedford　and　the　neighbouring　villages　was　past：　　that　all　who　were　to　be　saved　in　that　part　of　England　were　already　converted；　and　that　he　had　begun　to　pray　and　strive　some　months　too　late。　Then　he　was　harassed　by　doubts　whether　the　Turks　were　not　in　the　right；　and　the　Christians　in　the　wrong。　　Then　he　was　troubled　by　a　maniacal　impulse　which　prompted　him　to　pray　to　the　trees；　to　a　broom…stick；　to　the　parish　bull。　　As　yet；　however；　he　was　only　entering　the　Valley　of　the　Shadow　of　Death。　　Soon　the　darkness　grew　thicker。　　Hideous　forms　floated　before　him。　　Sounds　of　cursing　and　wailing　were　in　his　ears。　　His　way　ran　through　stench　and　fire；　close　to　the　mouth　of　the　bottomless　pit。　　He　began　to　be　haunted　by　a　strange　curiosity　about　the　unpardonable　sin；　and　by　a　morbid　longing　to　commit　it。　　But　the　most　frightful　of　all　the　forms　which　his　disease　took　was　a　propensity　to　utter　blasphemy；　and　especially　to　renounce　his　share　in　the　benefits　of　the　redemption。　　Night　and　day；　in　bed；　at　table；　at　work；　evil　spirits；　as　he　imagined；　were　repeating　close　to　his　ear　the　words；　〃Sell　him；　sell　him。〃　　He　struck　at　the　hobgoblins；　he　pushed　them　from　him；　but　still　they　were　ever　at　his　side。　　He　cried　out　in　answer　to　them；　hour　after　hour：　　〃Never；　never；　not　for　thousands　of　worlds；　not　for　thousands。〃　　At　length；　worn　out　by　this　long　agony；　he　suffered　the　fatal　words　to　escape　him；　〃Let　him　go；　if　he　will。〃　　Then　his　misery　became　more　fearful　than　ever。　　He　had　done　what　could　not　be　forgiven。　　He　had　forfeited　his　part　of　the　great　sacrifice。　　Like　Esau；　he　had　sold　his　birthright；　and　there　was　no　longer　any　place　for　repentance。　　〃None；〃　he　afterwards　wrote；　〃knows　the　terrors　of　those　days　but　myself。〃　　He　has　described　his　sufferings　with　singular　energy；　simplicity；　and　pathos。　　He　envied　the　brutes；　he　envied　the　very　stones　in　the　street；　and　the　tiles　on　the　houses。　　The　sun　seemed　to　withhold　its　light　and　warmth　from　him