when god laughs and other stories(当上帝发笑时)-第29节
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〃A bit pinched； so； and so； Your Excellency；〃 said Yi Chin Ho。
〃Yes； a bit pinched here and there； as you say；〃 said the Governor。
〃Withal it is an exceeding corpulent nose； thus； and so； all in one place；
at the end；〃 proceeded Yi Chin Ho。 〃Your Excellency would seek far and
wide and many a day for that nose and find it not！〃
〃An unusual nose；〃 admitted the Governor。
〃There is a wart upon it；〃 said Yi Chin Ho。
〃A most unusual nose；〃 said the Governor。 〃Never have I seen the
like。 But what do you with this nose； Yi Chin Ho？〃 〃I seek it whereby to
repay the money to the Government；〃 said Yi Chin Ho。 〃I seek it to be of
service to Your Excellency； and I seek it to save my own worthless head。
Further； I seek Your Excellency's seal upon this picture of the nose。〃
And the Governor laughed and affixed the seal of State； and Yi Chin
Ho departed。 For a month and a day he travelled the King's Road which
leads to the shore of the Eastern Sea； and there； one night； at the gate of
the largest mansion of a wealthy city he knocked loudly for admittance。
〃None other than the master of the house will I see；〃 said he fiercely to
the frightened servants。 〃I travel upon the King's business。〃
Straightway was he led to an inner room； where the master of the
house was roused from his sleep and brought blinking before him。
〃You are Pak Chung Chang； head man of this city；〃 said Yi Chin Ho in
tones that were all…accusing。 〃I am upon the King's business。〃
Pak Chung Chang trembled。 Well he knew the King's business was
ever a terrible business。 His knees smote together； and he near fell to the
floor。
〃The hour is late；〃 he quavered。 〃Were it not well to〃
〃The King's business never waits！〃 thundered Yi Chin Ho。 〃Come
apart with me； and swiftly。 I have an affair of moment to discuss with
you。
〃It is the King's affair；〃 he added with even greater fierceness； so that
Pak Chung Chang's silver pipe dropped from his nerveless fingers and
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WHEN GOD LAUGHS； AND OTHER STORIES
clattered on the floor。
〃Know then；〃 said Yi Chin Ho； when they had gone apart； 〃that the
King is troubled with an affliction； a very terrible affliction。 In that he
failed to cure； the Court physician has had nothing else than his head
chopped off。 From all the Eight Provinces have the physicians come to
wait upon the King。 Wise consultation have they held； and they have
decided that for a remedy for the King's affliction nothing else is required
than a nose； a certain kind of nose； a very peculiar certain kind of nose。
〃Then by none other was I summoned than His Excellency the Prime
Minister himself。 He put a paper into my hand。 Upon this paper was
the very peculiar kind of nose drawn by the physicians of the Eight
Provinces； with the seal of State upon it。
〃'Go；' said His Excellency the Prime Minister。 'Seek out this nose； for
the King's affliction is sore。 And wheresoever you find this nose upon
the face of a man； strike it off forthright and bring it in all haste to the
Court； for the King must be cured。 Go； and come not back until your
search is rewarded。'
〃And so I departed upon my quest；〃 said Yi Chin Ho。 〃I have sought
out the remotest corners of the kingdom； I have travelled the Eight
Highways； searched the Eight Provinces； and sailed the seas of the Eight
Coasts。 And here I am。〃
With a great flourish he drew a paper from his girdle； unrolled it with
many snappings and cracklings； and thrust it before the face of Pak Chung
Chang。 Upon the paper was the picture of the nose。
Pak Chung Chang stared upon it with bulging eyes。
〃Never have I beheld such a nose；〃 he began。
〃There is a wart upon it；〃 said Yi Chin Ho。
〃Never have I beheld〃 Pak Chung Chang began again。
〃Bring your father before me；〃 Yi Chin Ho interrupted sternly。
〃My ancient and very…much…to…be…respected ancestor sleeps；〃 said Pak
Chung Chang。
〃Why dissemble？〃 demanded Yi Chin Ho。 〃You know it is your
father's nose。 Bring him before me that I may strike it off and be gone。
Hurry； lest I make bad report of you。〃
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〃Mercy！〃 cried Pak Chung Chang； falling on his knees。 〃It is
impossible！ It is impossible！ You cannot strike off my father's nose。 He
cannot go down without his nose to the grave。 He will become a laughter
and a byword； and all my days and nights will be filled with woe。 O
reflect！ Report that you have seen no such nose in your travels。 You； too；
have a father。〃
Pak Chung Chang clasped Yi Chin Ho's knees and fell to weeping on
his sandals。
〃My heart softens strangely at your tears；〃 said Yi Chin Ho。 〃I； too；
know filial piety and regard。 But〃 He hesitated； then added； as
though thinking aloud； 〃It is as much as my head is worth。〃
〃How much is your head worth？〃 asked Pak Chung Chang in a thin；
small voice。
〃A not remarkable head；〃 said Yi Chin Ho。 〃An absurdly
unremarkable head； but； such is my great foolishness； I value it at nothing
less than one hundred thousand strings of cash。〃
〃So be it；〃 said Pak Chung Chang； rising to his feet。
〃I shall need horses to carry the treasure；〃 said Yi Chin Ho； 〃and men
to guard it well as I journey through the mountains。 There are robbers
abroad in the land。〃
〃There are robbers abroad in the land；〃 said Pak Chung Chang； sadly。
〃But it shall be as you wish； so long as my ancient and very…much…to…be…
respected ancestor's nose abide in its appointed place。〃
〃Say nothing to any man of this occurrence；〃 said Yi Chin Ho； 〃else
will other and more loyal servants than I be sent to strike off your father's
nose。〃
And so Yi Chin Ho departed on his way through the mountains； blithe
of heart and gay of song as he listened to the jingling bells of his treasure…
laden ponies。
There is little more to tell。 Yi Chin Ho prospered through the years。
By his efforts the jailer attained at length to the directorship of all the
prisons of Cho…sen； the Governor ultimately betook himself to the Sacred
City to be Prime Minister to the King； while Yi Chin Ho became the
King's boon companion and sat at table with him to the end of a round； fat
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life。 But Pak Chung Chang fell into a melancholy； and ever after he shook
his head sadly； with tears in his eyes； whenever he regarded the expensive
nose of his ancient and very…much…to…be…respected ancestor。
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WHEN GOD LAUGHS； AND OTHER STORIES
THE 〃FRANCIS SPAIGHT〃
（A TRUE TALE RETOLD）
The Francis Spaight was running before it solely under a
mizzentopsail； when the thing happened。 It was not due to carelessness
so much as to the lack of discipline of the crew and to the fact that they
were indifferent seamen at best。 The man at the wheel in particular； a
Limerick man； had had no experience with salt water beyond that of
rafting timber on the Shannon between the Quebec vessels and the shore。
He was afraid of the huge seas that rose out of the murk astern and bore
down upon him； and he was more given to cowering away from their
threatened impact than he was to meeting their blows with the wheel and
checking the ship's rush to broach to。
It was three in the morning when his unseamanlike conduct
precipitated the catastrophe。 At sight of a sea far larger than its fellows；
he crouched down； releasing his hands from the spokes。 The Francis
Spaight sheered as her stern lifted on the sea； receiving the full fling of the
cap on he
