armadale-第156节

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proposal　had　suggested　to　me；　the　moment　he　made　it；　that　my
fictitious　'family　circumstances'　might　be　turned　to　good　account
once　more；　as　a　reason　for　unexpectedly　summoning　me　from　Italy
to　England。

〃On　the　ninth　of　the　month　we　were　installed　at　Turin。

〃On　the　thirteenth；　Midwinterbeing　then　very　busyasked　if　I
would　save　him　a　loss　of　time　by　applying　for　any　letters　which
might　have　followed　us　from　Naples。　I　had　been　waiting　for　the
opportunity　he　now　offered　me；　and　I　determined　to　snatch　at　it
without　allowing　myself　time　to　hesitate。　There　were　no　letters
at　the　_poste　restante_　for　either　of　us。　But　when　he　put　the
question　on　my　return；　I　told　him　that　there　had　been　a　letter
for　me；　with　alarming　news　from　'home。'　My　'mother'　was
dangerously　ill；　and　I　was　entreated　to　lose　no　time　in　hurrying
back　to　England　to　see　her。

〃It　seems　quite　unaccountablenow　that　I　am　away　from　himbut
it　is　none　the　less　true；　that　I　could　not；　even　yet；　tell　him　a
downright　premeditated　falsehood；　without　a　sense　of　shrinking
and　shame；　which　other　people　would　think；　and　which　I　think
myself；　utterly　inconsistent　with　such　a　character　as　mine。
Inconsistent　or　not；　I　felt　it。　And　what　is　strangerperhaps　I
ought　to　say　madderstill；　if　he　had　persisted　in　his　first
resolution　to　accompany　me　himself　to　England　rather　than　allow
me　to　travel　alone；　I　firmly　believe　I　should　have　turned　my　back
on　temptation　for　the　second　time；　and　have　lulled　myself　to　rest
once　more　in　the　old　dream　of　living　out　my　life　happy　and
harmless　in　my　husband's　love。

〃Am　I　deceiving　myself　in　this？　It　doesn't　matterI　dare　say　I
am。　Never　mind　what　_might_　have　happened。　What　_did_　happen　is
the　only　thing　of　any　importance　now。

〃It　ended　in　Midwinter's　letting　me　persuade　him　that　I　was　old
enough　to　take　care　of　myself　on　the　journey　to　England；　and　that
he　owed　it　to　the　newspaper　people；　who　had　trusted　their
interests　in　his　hands；　not　to　leave　Turin　just　as　he　was
established　there。　He　didn't　suffer　at　taking　leave　of　me　as　he
suffered　when　he　saw　the　last　of　his　friend。　I　saw　that；　and　set
down　the　anxiety　he　expressed　that　I　should　write　to　him　at　its
proper　value。　I　have　quite　got　over　my　weakness　for　him　at　last。
No　man　who　really　loved　me　would　have　put　what　he　owed　to　a　peck
of　newspaper　people　before　what　he　owed　to　his　wife。　I　hate　him
for　letting　me　convince　him！　I　believe　he　was　glad　to　get　rid　of
me。　I　believe　he　has　seen　some　woman　whom　he　likes　at　Turin。
Well；　let　him　follow　his　new　fancy；　if　he　pleases！　I　shall　be　the
widow　of　Mr。　Armadale　of　Thorpe　Ambrose　before　long；　and　what
will　his　likes　or　dislikes　matter　to　me　then？

〃The　events　on　the　journey　were　not　worth　mentioning；　and　my
arrival　in　London　stands　recorded　already　on　the　top　of　the　new
page。

〃As　for　to…day；　the　one　thing　of　any　importance　that　I　have　done
since　I　got　to　the　cheap　and　quiet　hotel　at　which　I　am　now
staying；　has　been　to　send　for　the　landlord；　and　ask　him　to　help
me　to　a　sight　of　the　back　numbers　of　_The　Times_　newspaper。　He
has　politely　offered　to　accompany　me　himself　to…morrow　morning　to
some　place　in　the　City　where　all　the　papers　are　kept；　as　he　calls
it；　in　file。　Till　to…morrow；　then；　I　must　control　my　impatience
for　news　of　Armadale　as　well　as　I　can。　And　so　good…night　to　the
pretty　reflection　of　myself　that　appears　in　these　pages！


〃November　20th。Not　a　word　of　news　yet；　either　in　the　obituary
column　or　in　any　other　part　of　the　paper。　I　looked　carefully
through　each　number　in　succession；　dating　from　the　day　when
Armadale's　letter　was　written　at　Messina　to　this　present　20th　of
the　month；　and　I　am　certain；　whatever　may　have　happened；　that
nothing　is　known　in　England　as　yet。　Patience！　The　newspaper　is　to
meet　me　at　the　breakfast…table　every　morning　till　further　notice；
and　any　day　now　may　show　me　what　I　most　want　to　see。


〃November　21st。No　news　again。　I　wrote　to　Midwinter　to…day；　to
keep　up　appearances。

〃When　the　letter　was　done；　I　fell　into　wretchedly　low　spiritsI
can't　imagine　whyand　felt　such　a　longing　for　a　little　company
that；　in　despair　of　knowing　where　else　to　go；　I　actually　went　to
Pimlico；　on　the　chance　that　Mother　Oldershaw　might　have　returned
to　her　old　quarters。

〃There　were　changes　since　I　had　seen　the　place　during　my　former
stay　in　London。　Doctor　Downward's　side　of　the　house　was　still
empty。　But　the　shop　was　being　brightened　up　for　the　occupation　of
a　milliner　and　dress…maker。　The　people；　when　I　went　in　to　make
inquiries；　were　all　strangers　to　me。　They　showed；　however；　no
hesitation　in　giving　me　Mrs。　Oldershaw's　address　when　I　asked　for
itfrom　which　I　infer　that　the　little　'difficulty'　which　forced
her　to　be　in　hiding　in　August　last　is　at　an　end；　so　far　as　she　is
concerned。　As　for　the　doctor；　the　people　at　the　shop　either　were；
or　pretended　to　be；　quite　unable　to　tell　me　what　had　become　of
him。

〃I　don't　know　whether　it　was　the　sight　of　the　place　at　Pimlico
that　sickened　me；　or　whether　it　was　my　own　perversity；　or　what。
But　now　that　I　had　got　Mrs。　Oldershaw's　address；　I　felt　as　if　she
was　the　very　last　person　in　the　world　that　I　wanted　to　see。　I
took　a　cab；　and　told　the　man　to　drive　to　the　street　she　lived　in；
　and　then　told　him　to　drive　back　to　the　hotel。　I　hardly　know　what
is　the　matter　with　meunless　it　is　that　I　am　getting　more
impatient　every　hour　for　information　about　Armadale。　When　will
the　future　look　a　little　less　dark；　I　wonder？　To…morrow　is
Saturday。　Will　to…morrow's　newspaper　lift　the　veil？


〃November　22d。Saturday's　newspaper　_has_　lifted　the　veil！　Words
are　vain　to　express　the　panic　of　astonishment　in　which　I　write。　I
never　once　anticipated　it；　I　can't　believe　it　or　realize　it；　now
it　has　happened。　The　winds　and　waves　themselves　have　turned　my
accomplices！　The　yacht　has　foundered　at　sea；　and　every　soul　on
board　has　perished！

〃Here　is　the　account　cut　out　of　this　morning's　newspaper：


〃　'DISASTER　AT　SEA。Intelligence　has　reached　the　Royal　Yacht
Squadron　and　the　insurers　which　leaves　no　reasonable　doubt；　we
regret　to　say；　of　the　total　loss；　on　the　fifth　of　the　present
month；　of　the　yacht　_Dorothea；_　with　every　soul　on　board。　The
particulars　are　as　follows：　At　daylight；　on　the　morning　of　the
sixth；　the　Italian　brig　_Speranza；_　bound　from　Venice　to　Marsala
for　orders；　encountered　some　floating　objects　off　Cape
Spartivento　（at　the　southernmost　extremity　of　Italy）　which
attracted　the　curiosity　of　the　people　of　the　brig。　The　previous
day　had　been　marked　by　one　of　the　most　severe　of　the　sudden　and
violent　storms；　peculiar　to　these　southern　seas；　which　has　been
remembered　for　years。　The　_Speranza_　herself　having　been　in
danger　while　the　gale　lasted；　the　captain　and　crew　concluded　that
they　were　on　the　traces　of　a　wreck；　and　a　boat　was　lowered　for
the　purpose　of　examining　the　objects　in　the　water。　A　hen…coop；
some　broken　spars；　and　fragments　of　shattered　plank　were　the
first　evidences　discovered　of　the　terrible　disaster　that　had
happened。　Some　of　the　lighter　articles　of　cabin　furniture；
wrenched　and　shattered；　were　found　next。　And；　lastly；　a　memento
of　melancholy　interest　turned　up；　in　the　shape　of　a　lifebuoy；
with　a　corked　bottle　attached　to　it。　These　latter　objects；　with
the　relics　of　cabin　furniture；　were　brought　on　board　the
_Speranza。_　On　the　buoy　the　name　of　the　vessel　was　painted；　as
follows：　〃_Dorothea；　R。　Y。　S。_〃　（meaning　Royal　Yacht　Squadron）。
The　bottle；　on　being　uncorked；　contained　a　sheet　of　note…paper；
on　which　the　following　lines　were　hurriedly　traced　in　pencil：
〃Off　Cape　Spartivento；　two　days　out　from　Messina。　Nov。　5th；　4
P。M。〃　（being　the　hour　at　which　the　log　of　the　Italian　brig　showed
the　storm　to　have　been　at　its　height）。　〃Both　our　boats　are　stove
in　by　the　sea。　The　rudder　is　gone；　and　we　have　sprung　a　leak
astern　which　is　more　than　we　can　stop。　The　Lord　help　us　allwe
are　sinking。　（Signed）　John　Mitchenden；　Mate。〃　On　reaching
Marsala；　the　captain　of　the　brig　made　his　report　to　the　British
consul；　and　left　the　objects　discovered　in　that　gentleman's
charge。　Inquiry　at　Messina　showed　that　the　ill…fated　vessel　had
arrived　there　from　Naples。　At　the　latter　port　it　was　ascertained
that　the　_Dorothea_　had　been　hired　from　the　owner's　agent　by　an
English　gentleman；　Mr。　Armadale；　of　Thorpe　Ambrose；　Norfolk。
Whether　Mr。　Armadale　had　any　friends　on　board　with　him　has　not
been　clearly　discovered。　But　there　is　unhappily　no　doubt　that　the
ill…fated　gentleman　himself　sailed　in　the　yacht　from　Naples；　and
that　he　was　also　on　board　of　the　vessel　when　she　left　Messina。'


〃Such　is　the　story　of　the　wreck；　as　the　newspaper　tells　it　in　the
plainest　and　fewest　words。　My　head　is　in　a　whirl；　my　confusion　is
so　great　that　I　think　of　fifty　different　things　in　trying　to
think　of　one。　I　must　waita　day　more　or　less　is　of　no
consequence　nowI　must　wait　till　I　can　face　my　new　position；
without　feeling　bewildered　by　it。


〃November　23d。Eight　in　the　morning。I　rose　an　hour　ago；　and
saw　my　way　clearly　to　the　first　step　that　I　must　take　under
present　circumstances。

〃It　is　of　the　utmost　importance　to　me　to　know　what　is　doing　at
Thorpe　Ambrose；　and　it　would　be　the　height　of　rashness；　while　I
am　qui