northanger abbey(诺桑觉奇)-第57节
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apprehension of not being equally beloved by the other； she would
at each moment of each day have been perfectly happy； but she
was now in the fourth week of her visit； before the General came
home； the fourth week would be turned； and perhaps it might
seem an intrusion if she stayed much longer。 This was a painful
consideration whenever it occurred； and eager to get rid of such a
weight on her mind； she very soon resolved to speak to Eleanor
about it at once； propose going away； and be guided in her
conduct by the manner in which her proposal might be taken。
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Aware that if she gave herself much time； she might feel it
difficult to bring forward so unpleasant a subject； she took the first
opportunity of being suddenly alone with Eleanor； and of
Eleanor’s being in the middle of a speech about something very
different； to start forth her obligation of going away very soon。
Eleanor looked and declared herself much concerned。 She had
“hoped for the pleasure of her company for a much longer time—
had been misled （perhaps by her wishes） to suppose that a much
longer visit had been promised—and could not but think that if
Mr。 and Mrs。 Morland were aware of the pleasure it was to her to
have her there； they would be too generous to hasten her
return。”—Catherine explained。—“Oh！ As to that； Papa and
Mamma were in no hurry at all。 As long as she was happy； they
would always be satisfied。”
“Then why； might she ask； in such a hurry herself to leave
them？”
“Oh！ Because she had been there so long。”
“Nay； if you can use such a word； I can urge you no farther。 If
you think it long—”
“Oh！ no； I do not indeed。 For my own pleasure； I could stay
with you as long again。” And it was directly settled that； till she
had； her leaving them was not even to be thought of。 In having this
cause of uneasiness so pleasantly removed； the force of the other
was likewise weakened。 The kindness； the earnestness of
Eleanor’s manner in pressing her to stay； and Henry’s gratified
look on being told that her stay was determined； were such sweet
proofs of her importance with them； as left her only just so much
solicitude as the human mind can never do comfortably without。
She did—almost always—believe that Henry loved her； and quite
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always that his father and sister loved and even wished her to
belong to them； and believing so far； her doubts and anxieties
were merely sportive irritations。
Henry was not able to obey his father’s injunction of remaining
wholly at Northanger in attendance on the ladies； during his
absence in London； the engagements of his curate at Woodston
obliging him to leave them on Saturday for a couple of nights。 His
loss was not now what it had been while the General was at home；
it lessened their gaiety； but did not ruin their comfort； and the two
girls agreeing in occupation； and improving in intimacy； found
themselves so well sufficient for the time to themselves； that it was
eleven o’clock； rather a late hour at the Abbey； before they quitted
the supper…room on the day of Henry’s departure。 They had just
reached the head of the stairs when it seemed； as far as the
thickness of the walls would allow them to judge； that a carriage
was driving up to the door； and the next moment confirmed the
idea by the loud noise of the house…bell。 After the first
perturbation of surprise had passed away； in a “Good heaven！
what can be the matter？” it was quickly decided by Eleanor to be
her eldest brother； whose arrival was often as sudden； if not quite
so unseasonable； and accordingly she hurried down to welcome
him。
Catherine walked on to her chamber； making up her mind as
well as she could； to a further acquaintance with Captain Tilney；
and comforting herself under the unpleasant impression his
conduct had given her； and the persuasion of his being by far too
fine a gentleman to approve of her； that at least they should not
meet under such circumstances as would make their meeting
materially painful。 She trusted he would never speak of Miss
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Thorpe； and indeed； as he must by this time be ashamed of the
part he had acted； there could be no danger of it； and as long as all
mention of Bath scenes were avoided； she thought she could
behave to him very civilly。 In such considerations time passed
away； and it was certainly in his favour that Eleanor should be so
glad to see him； and have so much to say； for half an hour was
almost gone since his arrival； and Eleanor did not come up。
At that moment Catherine thought she heard her step in the
gallery； and listened for its continuance； but all was silent。
Scarcely； however； had she convicted her fancy of error； when the
noise of something moving close to her door made her start； it
seemed as if someone was touching the very doorway—and in
another moment a slight motion of the lock proved that some hand
must be on it。 She trembled a little at the idea of anyone’s
approaching so cautiously； but resolving not to be again overcome
by trivial appearances of alarm； or misled by a raised imagination；
she stepped quietly forward； and opened the door。 Eleanor； and
only Eleanor； stood there。 Catherine’s spirits； however； were
tranquillized but for an instant； for Eleanor’s cheeks were pale；
and her manner greatly agitated。 Though evidently intending to
come in； it seemed an effort to enter the room； and a still greater to
speak when there。 Catherine； supposing some uneasiness on
Captain Tilney’s account； could only express her concern by silent
attention； obliged her to be seated； rubbed her temples with
lavender…water； and hung over her with affectionate solicitude。
“My dear Catherine； you must not—you must not indeed—” were
Eleanor’s first connected words。 “I am quite well。 This kindness
distracts me—I cannot bear it—I come to you on such an errand！”
“Errand！—to me！”
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“How shall I tell you！—Oh！ How shall I tell you！”
A new idea now darted into Catherine’s mind； and turning as
pale as her friend； she exclaimed； “’Tis a messenger from
Woodston！”
“You are mistaken； indeed；” returned Eleanor； looking at her
most compassionately—“it is no one from Woodston。 It is my
father himself。” Her voice faltered； and her eyes were turned to
the ground as she mentioned his name。 His unlooked…for return
was enough in itself to make Catherine’s heart sink； and for a few
moments she hardly supposed there were anything worse to be
told。 She said nothing； and Eleanor endeavouring to collect herself
and speak with firmness； but with eyes still cast down； soon went
on。 “You are too good； I am sure； to think the worse of me for the
part I am obliged to perform。 I am indeed a most
