new burlesques(新讽刺诗)-第3节
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carriage beside the most beautiful red…haired girl I had ever seen； was the
King；the King whom we had left two hours ago； dead drunk in the hut in
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the forest！
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CHAPTERS III TO XXII
（Inclusive）
IN WHICH THINGS GET MIXED
We reeled against each other aghast！ Spitz recovered himself first。
〃We must fly！〃 he said hoarsely。 〃If the King has discovered our trick
we are lost！〃
〃But where shall we go？〃 I asked。
〃Back to the hut。〃
We caught the next train to Bock。 An hour later we stood panting
within the hut。 Its walls and ceiling were splashed with sinister red stains。
〃Blood！〃 I exclaimed joyfully。 〃At last we have a real mediaeval
adventure！〃
〃It's Burgundy； you fool；〃 growled Spitz； 〃good Burgundy wasted！〃 At
this moment Fritz appeared dragging in the hut…keeper。
〃Where is the King？〃 demanded Spitz fiercely of the trembling
peasant。
〃He was carried away an hour ago by Black Michael and taken to the
castle。〃
〃And when did he LEAVE the castle？〃 roared Spitz。
〃He never left the castle； sir； and； alas！ I fear never will； alive！〃 replied
the man； shuddering。
We stared at each other！ Spitz bit his grizzled mustache。 〃So；〃 he
said bitterly； 〃Black Michael has simply anticipated us with the same
game！ We have been tricked。 I knew it could not be the King whom
they crowned！ No！〃 he added quickly； 〃I see it allit was Rupert of
Glasgow！〃
〃Who is Rupert of Glasgow？〃 I cried。
〃Oh； I really can't go over all that family rot again；〃 grunted Spitz。
〃Tell him； Fritz。〃
Then； taking me aside； Fritz delicately informed me that Rupert of
Glasgowa young Scotchmanclaimed equally with myself descent from
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the old Rupert； and that equally with myself he resembled the King。 That
Michael had got possession of him on his arrival in the country； kept him
closely guarded in the castle； and had hid his resemblance in a black wig
and false mustache； that the young Scotchman； however； seemed
apparently devoted to Michael and his plots； and there was undoubtedly
some secret understanding between them。 That it was evidently
Michael's trick to have the pretender crowned； and then； by exposing the
fraud and the condition of the real King； excite the indignation of the
duped people； and seat himself on the throne！ 〃But；〃 I burst out； 〃shall
this base…born pretender remain at Kohlslau beside the beautiful Princess
Flirtia？ Let us to Kohlslau at once and hurl him from the throne！〃
〃One pretender is as good as another；〃 said Spitz dryly。 〃But leave
HIM to me。 'Tis the King we must protect and succor！ As for that
Scotch springald； before midnight I shall have him kidnaped； brought back
to his master in a close carriage； and youYOU shall take his place at
Kohlslau。〃
〃I will；〃 I said enthusiastically； drawing my sword； 〃but I have done
nothing yet。 Please let me kill something！〃
〃Aye； lad！〃 said Spitz； with a grim smile at my enthusiasm。 〃There's a
sheep in your path。 Go out and cleave it to the saddle。 And bring the
saddle home！〃
My sister…in…law might have thought me cruelbut I did it。
CHAP XXIII AND SOME OTHER CHAPS
I know not how it was compassed； but that night Rupert of Glasgow
was left bound and gagged against the door of the castle； and the night…bell
pulled。 And that night I was seated on the throne of the S'helpburgs。 As
I gazed at the Princess Flirtia； glowing in the characteristic beauty of the
S'helpburgs； and admired her striking profile； I murmured softly and half
audibly： 〃Her nose is as a tower that looketh toward Damascus。〃
She looked puzzled； and knitted her pretty brows。 〃Is that poetry？〃
she asked。
〃No〃 I said promptly。 〃It's only part of a song of our great Ancestor。〃
As she blushed slightly； I playfully flung around her fair neck the jeweled
collar of the Order of the S'helpburgsthree golden spheres pendant；
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quartered from the arms of Lombardy…with the ancient Syric motto； El
Ess Dee。
She toyed with it a moment； and then said softly： 〃You have changed；
Rupert。 Do ye no ken hoo？〃
I looked at heras surprised at her dialect as at the imputation。
〃You don't talk that way； as you did。 And you don't say； 'It WILL be
twelve o'clock；' when you mean； 'It IS twelve o'clock；' nor 'I will be going
out；' when you mean 'I AM。' And you didn't say； 'Eh； sirs！' or 'Eh； mon；'
to any of the Courtnor 'Hoot awa！' nor any of those things。 And；〃 she
added with a divine little pout； 〃you haven't told me I was 'sonsie' or
'bonnie' once。〃
I could with difficulty restrain myself。 Rage； indignation； and
jealousy filled my heart almost to bursting。 I understood it all； that
rascally Scotchman had made the most of his time； and dared to get ahead
of me！ I did not mind being taken for the King； but to be confounded
with this infernal descendant of a gamekeeperwas too much！ Yet with a
superhuman effort I remained calmand even smiled。
〃You are not well？〃 said the Princess earnestly。 〃I thought you were
taking too much of the Strasbourg pie at supper！ And you are not going；
surelyso soon？〃 she added； as I rose。
〃I must go at once；〃 I said。 〃I have forgotten some important
business at Bock。〃
〃Not boar hunting again？〃 she said poutingly。
〃No； I'm hunting a red dear；〃 I said with that playful subtlety which
would make her take it as a personal compliment； though I was only
thinking of that impostor； and longing to get at him； as I bowed and
withdrew。
In another hour I was before Black Michael's castle at Bock。 These
are lightning changes； I knowand the sovereignty of Trulyruralania WAS
somewhat itinerantbut when a kingdom and a beautiful Princess are at
stake； what are you to do？ Fritz had begged me to take him along； but I
arranged that he should come later； and go up unostentatiously in the lift。
I was going by way of the moat。 I was to succor the King； but I fear my
real object was to get at Rupert of Glasgow。
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I had noticed the day before that a large outside drain pipe； decreed by
the Bock County Council； ran from the moat to the third floor of the
donjon keep。 I surmised that the King was imprisoned on that floor。
Examining the pipe closely； I saw that it was really a pneumatic dispatch
tube； for secretly conveying letters and dispatches from the castle through
the moat beyond the castle walls。 Its extraordinary size； however； gave
me the horrible conviction that it was to be used to convey the dead body
of the King to the moat。 I grew cold with horrorbut I was determined。
I crept up the pipe。 As I expected； it opened funnel…wise into a room
where the poor King was playing poker with Black Michael。 It took me
but a moment to dash through the window into the room； push the King
aside； gag and bind Black Michael； and lower him by a stout rope into the
pipe he had destined for another。 Having him in my power； I lowered
him until I heard his body splash in the water in the lower part of the pipe。
Then I proceeded to draw him up again； intending to question him in
regard to Rupert of Glasgow。 But this was difficult； as his saturated
clothing made him fit
