道林格雷的画像_奥斯卡·王尔德-第15节

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she　flushed。　〃what　do　you　mean；　jim？〃　she　asked。

〃you　have　a　new　friend；　i　hear。　who　is　he？　why　have　you　not　told　me　about　him？　he　means　you　no　good。〃

〃stop；　jim！〃　she　exclaimed。　〃you　must　not　say　anything　against　him。　i　love　him。〃

〃why；　you　dont　even　know　his　name；〃　answered　the　lad。　〃who　is　he？　i　have　a　right　to　know。〃

〃he　is　called　prince　charming。　dont　you　like　the　name。　oh！　you　silly　boy！　you　should　never　forget　it。　if　you　only　saw　him；　you　would　think　him　the　most　wonderful　person　in　the　world。　some　day　you　will　meet　himwhen　you　e　back　from　australia。　you　will　like　him　so　much。　everybody　likes　him；　and　i　。。。　love　him。　i　wish　you　could　e　to　the　theatre　to…night。　he　is　going　to　be　there；　and　i　am　to　play　juliet。　oh！　how　i　shall　play　it！　fancy；　jim；　to　be　in　love　and　play　juliet！　to　have　him　sitting　there！　to　play　for　his　delight！　i　am　afraid　i　may　frighten　the　pany；　frighten　or　enthrall　them。　to　be　in　love　is　to　surpass　ones　self。　poor　dreadful　mr。　isaacs　will　be　shouting　genius　to　his　loafers　at　the　bar。　he　has　preached　me　as　a　dogma；　to…night　he　will　announce　me　as　a　revelation。　i　feel　it。　and　it　is　all　his；　his　only；　prince　charming；　my　wonderful　lover；　my　god　of　graces。　but　i　am　poor　beside　him。　poor？　what　does　that　matter？　when　poverty　creeps　in　at　the　door；　love　flies　in　through　the　window。　our　proverbs　want　rewriting。　they　were　made　in　winter；　and　it　is　summer　now；　spring…time　for　me；　i　think；　a　very　dance　of　blossoms　in　blue　skies。〃

〃he　is　a　gentleman；〃　said　the　lad　sullenly。

〃a　prince！〃　she　cried　musically。　〃what　more　do　you　want？〃

〃he　wants　to　enslave　you。〃

〃i　shudder　at　the　thought　of　being　free。〃

〃i　want　you　to　beware　of　him。〃

〃to　see　him　is　to　worship　him；　to　know　him　is　to　trust　him。〃

〃sibyl；　you　are　mad　about　him。〃

she　laughed　and　took　his　arm。　〃you　dear　old　jim；　you　talk　as　if　you　were　a　hundred。　some　day　you　will　be　in　love　yourself。　then　you　will　know　what　it　is。　dont　look　so　sulky。　surely　you　should　be　glad　to　think　that；　though　you　are　going　away；　you　leave　me　happier　than　i　have　ever　been　before。　life　has　been　hard　for　us　both；　terribly　hard　and　difficult。　but　it　will　be　different　now。　you　are　going　to　a　new　world；　and　i　have　found　one。　here　are　two　chairs；　let　us　sit　down　and　see　the　smart　people　go　by。〃

they　took　their　seats　amidst　a　crowd　of　watchers。　the　tulip…beds　across　the　road　flamed　like　throbbing　rings　of　fire。　a　white　dust　tremulous　cloud　of　orris…root　it　seemedhung　in　the　panting　air。　the　brightly　coloured　parasols　danced　and　dipped　like　monstrous　butterflies。

she　made　her　brother　talk　of　himself；　his　hopes；　his　prospects。　he　spoke　slowly　and　with　effort。　they　passed　words　to　each　other　as　players　at　a　game　pass　counters。　sibyl　felt　oppressed。　she　could　not　municate　her　joy。　a　faint　smile　curving　that　sullen　mouth　was　all　the　echo　she　could　win。　after　some　time　she　became　silent。　suddenly　she　caught　a　glimpse　of　golden　hair　and　laughing　lips；　and　in　an　open　carriage　with　two　ladies　dorian　gray　drove　past。

she　started　to　her　feet。　〃there　he　is！〃　she　cried。

〃who？〃　said　jim　vane。

〃prince　charming；〃　she　answered；　looking　after　the　victoria。

he　jumped　up　and　seized　her　roughly　by　the　arm。　〃show　him　to　me。　which　is　he？　point　him　out。　i　must　see　him！〃　he　exclaimed；　but　at　that　moment　the　duke　of　berwicks　four…in…hand　came　between；　and　when　it　had　left　the　space　clear；　the　carriage　had　swept　out　of　the　park。

〃he　is　gone；〃　murmured　sibyl　sadly。　〃i　wish　you　had　seen　him。〃

〃i　wish　i　had；　for　as　sure　as　there　is　a　god　in　heaven；　if　he　ever　does　you　any　wrong；　i　shall　kill　him。〃

she　looked　at　him　in　horror。　he　repeated　his　words。　they　cut　the　air　like　a　dagger。　the　people　round　began　to　gape。　a　lady　standing　close　to　her　tittered。

〃e　away；　jim；　e　away；〃　she　whispered。　he　followed　her　doggedly　as　she　passed　through　the　crowd。　he　felt　glad　at　what　he　had　said。

when　they　reached　the　achilles　statue；　she　turned　round。　there　was　pity　in　her　eyes　that　became　laughter　on　her　lips。　she　shook　her　head　at　him。　〃you　are　foolish；　jim；　utterly　foolish；　a　bad…tempered　boy；　that　is　all。　how　can　you　say　such　horrible　things？　you　dont　know　what　you　are　talking　about。　you　are　simply　jealous　and　unkind。　ah！　i　wish　you　would　fall　in　love。　love　makes　people　good；　and　what　you　said　was　wicked。〃

〃i　am　sixteen；〃　he　answered；　〃and　i　know　what　i　am　about。　mother　is　no　help　to　you。　she　doesnt　understand　how　to　look　after　you。　i　wish　now　that　i　was　not　going　to　australia　at　all。　i　have　a　great　mind　to　chuck　the　whole　thing　up。　i　would；　if　my　articles　hadnt　been　signed。〃

〃oh；　dont　be　so　serious；　jim。　you　are　like　one　of　the　heroes　of　those　silly　melodramas　mother　used　to　be　so　fond　of　acting　in。　i　am　not　going　to　quarrel　with　you。　i　have　seen　him；　and　oh！　to　see　him　is　perfect　happiness。　we　wont　quarrel。　i　know　you　would　never　harm　any　one　i　love；　would　you？〃

〃not　as　long　as　you　love　him；　i　suppose；〃　was　the　sullen　answer。

〃i　shall　love　him　for　ever！〃　she　cried。

〃and　he？〃

〃for　ever；　too！〃

〃he　had　better。〃

she　shrank　from　him。　then　she　laughed　and　put　her　hand　on　his　arm。　he　was　merely　a　boy。

at　the　marble　arch　they　hailed　an　omnibus；　which　left　them　close　to　their　shabby　home　in　the　euston　road。　it　was　after　five　oclock；　and　sibyl　had　to　lie　down　for　a　couple　of　hours　before　acting。　jim　insisted　that　she　should　do　so。　he　said　that　he　would　sooner　part　with　her　when　their　mother　was　not　present。　she　would　be　sure　to　make　a　scene；　and　he　detested　scenes　of　every　kind。

in　sybils　own　room　they　parted。　there　was　jealousy　in　the　lads　heart；　and　a　fierce　murderous　hatred　of　the　stranger　who；　as　it　seemed　to　him；　had　e　between　them。　yet；　when　her　arms　were　flung　round　his　neck；　and　her　fingers　strayed　through　his　hair；　he　softened　and　kissed　her　with　real　affection。　there　were　tears　in　his　eyes　as　he　went　downstairs。

his　mother　was　waiting　for　him　below。　she　grumbled　at　his　unpunctuality；　as　he　entered。　he　made　no　answer；　but　sat　down　to　his　meagre　meal。　the　flies　buzzed　round　the　table　and　crawled　over　the　stained　cloth。　through　the　rumble　of　omnibuses；　and　the　clatter　of　street…cabs；　he　could　hear　the　droning　voice　devouring　each　minute　that　was　left　to　him。

after　some　time；　he　thrust　away　his　plate　and　put　his　head　in　his　hands。　he　felt　that　he　had　a　right　to　know。　it　should　have　been　told　to　him　before；　if　it　was　as　he　suspected。　leaden　with　fear；　his　mother　watched　him。　words　dropped　mechanically　from　her　lips。　a　tattered　lace　handkerchief　twitched　in　her　fingers。　when　the　clock　struck　six；　he　got　up　and　went　to　the　door。　then　he　turned　back　and　looked　at　her。　their　eyes　met。　in　hers　he　saw　a　wild　appeal　for　mercy。　it　enraged　him。

〃mother；　i　have　something　to　ask　you；〃　he　said。　her　eyes　wandered　vaguely　about　the　room。　she　made　no　answer。　〃tell　me　the　truth。　i　have　a　right　to　know。　were　you　married　to　my　father？〃

she　heaved　a　deep　sigh。　it　was　a　sigh　of　relief。　the　terrible　moment；　the　moment　that　night　and　day；　for　weeks　and　months；　she　had　dreaded；　had　e　at　last；　and　yet　she　felt　no　terror。　indeed；　in　some　measure　it　was　a　disappointment　to　her。　the　vulgar　directness　of　the　question　called　for　a　direct　answer。　the　situation　had　not　been　gradually　led　up　to。　it　was　crude。　it　reminded　her　of　a　bad　rehearsal。

〃no；〃　she　answered；　wondering　at　the　harsh　simplicity　of　life。

〃my　father　was　a　scoundrel　then！〃　cried　the　lad；　clenching　his　fists。

she　shook　her　head。　〃i　knew　he　was　not　free。　we　loved　each　other　very　much。　if　he　had　lived；　he　would　have　made　provision　for　us。　dont　speak　against　him；　my　son。　he　was　your　father；　and　a　gentleman。　indeed；　he　was　highly　connected。〃

an　oath　broke　from　his　lips。　〃i　dont　care　for　myself；〃　he　exclaimed；　〃but　dont　let　sibyl。　。　。　。　it　is　a　gentleman；　isnt　it；　who　is　in　love　with　her；　or　says　he　is？　highly　connected；　too；　i　suppose。〃

for　a　moment　a　hideous　sense　of　humiliation　came　over　the　woman。　her　head　drooped。　she　wiped　her　eyes　with　shaking　hands。　〃sibyl　has　a　mother；〃　she　murmured；　〃i　had　none。〃

the　lad　was　touched。　he　went　towards　her；　and　stooping　down；　he　kissed　her。　〃i　am　sorry　if　i　have　pained　you　by　asking　about　my　father；〃　he　said；　〃but　i　could　not　help　it。　i　must　go　now。　good…bye。　dont　forget　that　you　will　have　only　one　child　now　to　look　after；　and　believe　me　that　if　this　man　wrongs　my　sister；　i　will　find　out　who　he　is；　track　him　down；　and　kill　him　like　a　dog。　i　swear　it。〃

the　exaggerated　folly　of　the　threat；　the　passionate　gesture　that　acpanied　it；　the　mad　melodramatic　words；　made　life　seem　more　vivid　to　her。　she　was　familiar　with　the　atmosphere。　she　breathed　more　freely；　and　for　the　first　time　for　many　months　she　really　admired　her　son。　she　would　have　liked　to　have　continued　the　scene　on　the　same　emotional　scale；　but　he　cut　her　short。　trunks　had　to　be　carried　down　and　mufflers　looked　for。　the　lodging…house　drudge　bustled　in　and　out。　there　was　the　bargaining　with　the　cabman。　the　moment　was　lost　in　vulgar　details。　it　was　with　a　renewed　feeling　of　disappointment　that　she　waved　the　tattered　lace　handkerchief　from　the　window；　as　her　son　drove　away。　she　was　conscious　that　a　great　opportunity　had　been　wasted。　she　consoled　herself　by　telling　sibyl　how　desolate　she　felt　her　life