the idle thoughts of an idle fellow[1].(一个浪子的随想)-第14节
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and the brambly lanes； on the heathy moors and the great still hills； if we
want to feel its joyous breath and hear its silent voices。 There is a glorious
freshness in the spring there。 The scurrying clouds； the open bleakness； the
rushing wind； and the clear bright air thrill one with vague energies and
hopes。 Life； like the landscape around us； seems bigger； and wider； and
freera rainbow road leading to unknown ends。 Through the silvery rents
that bar the sky we seem to catch a glimpse of the great hope and grandeur
that lies around this little throbbing world； and a breath of its scent is
wafted us on the wings of the wild March wind。
Strange thoughts we do not understand are stirring in our hearts。
Voices are calling us to some great effort； to some mighty work。 But we do
not comprehend their meaning yet； and the hidden echoes within us that
would reply are struggling； inarticulate and dumb。
We stretch our hands like children to the light； seeking to grasp we
know not what。 Our thoughts； like the boys' thoughts in the Danish song；
are very long； long thoughts； and very vague； we cannot see their end。
It must be so。 All thoughts that peer outside this narrow world cannot
be else than dim and shapeless。 The thoughts that we can clearly grasp are
very little thoughtsthat two and two make four…that when we are hungry
it is pleasant to eatthat honesty is the best policy； all greater thoughts are
undefined and vast to our poor childish brains。 We see but dimly through
the mists that roll around our time…girt isle of life； and only hear the distant
surging of the great sea beyond。
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THE IDLE THOUGHTS OF AN IDLE FELLOW。
ON CATS AND DOGS。
What I've suffered from them this morning no tongue can tell。 It began
with Gustavus Adolphus。 Gustavus Adolphus （they call him 〃Gusty〃
down…stairs for short） is a very good sort of dog when he is in the middle
of a large field or on a fairly extensive common； but I won't have him
indoors。 He means well； but this house is not his size。 He stretches himself；
and over go two chairs and a what…not。 He wags his tail； and the room
looks as if a devastating army had marched through it。 He breathes； and it
puts the fire out。
At dinner…time he creeps in under the table； lies there for awhile； and
then gets up suddenly； the first intimation we have of his movements
being given by the table； which appears animated by a desire to turn
somersaults。 We all clutch at it frantically and endeavor to maintain it in a
horizontal position； whereupon his struggles； he being under the
impression that some wicked conspiracy is being hatched against him；
become fearful； and the final picture presented is generally that of an
overturned table and a smashed…up dinner sandwiched between two
sprawling layers of infuriated men and women。
He came in this morning in his usual style； which he appears to have
founded on that of an American cyclone； and the first thing he did was to
sweep my coffee…cup off the table with his tail； sending the contents full
into the middle of my waistcoat。
I rose from my chair hurriedly and remarking 〃；〃 approached him at
a rapid rate。 He preceded me in the direction of the door。 At the door he
met Eliza coming in with eggs。 Eliza observed 〃Ugh！〃 and sat down on the
floor； the eggs took up different positions about the carpet； where they
spread themselves out； and Gustavus Adolphus left the room。 I called after
him； strongly advising him to go straight downstairs and not let me see
him again for the next hour or so； and he seeming to agree with me；
dodged the coal…scoop and went； while I returned； dried myself and
finished breakfast。 I made sure that he had gone in to the yard； but when I
looked into the passage ten minutes later he was sitting at the top of the
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THE IDLE THOUGHTS OF AN IDLE FELLOW。
stairs。 I ordered him down at once； but he only barked and jumped about；
so I went to see what was the matter。
It was Tittums。 She was sitting on the top stair but one and wouldn't let
him pass。
Tittums is our kitten。 She is about the size of a penny roll。 Her back
was up and she was swearing like a medical student。
She does swear fearfully。 I do a little that way myself sometimes； but I
am a mere amateur compared with her。 To tell you the truthmind； this is
strictly between ourselves； please； I shouldn't like your wife to know I said
itthe women folk don't understand these things； but between you and me；
you know； I think it does at man good to swear。 Swearing is the safety…
valve through which the bad temper that might otherwise do serious
internal injury to his mental mechanism escapes in harmless vaporing。
When a man has said： 〃Bless you； my dear； sweet sir。 What the sun； moon；
and stars made you so careless （if I may be permitted the expression） as to
allow your light and delicate foot to descend upon my corn with so much
force？ Is it that you are physically incapable of comprehending the
direction in which you are proceeding？ you nice； clever young manyou！〃
or words to that effect； he feels better。 Swearing has the same soothing
effect upon our angry passions that smashing the furniture or slamming
the doors is so well known to exercise； added to which it is much cheaper。
Swearing clears a man out like a pen'orth of gunpowder does the wash…
house chimney。 An occasional explosion is good for both。 I rather distrust
a man who never swears； or savagely kicks the foot…stool； or pokes the fire
with unnecessary violence。 Without some outlet； the anger caused by the
ever…occurring troubles of life is apt to rankle and fester within。 The petty
annoyance； instead of being thrown from us； sits down beside us and
becomes a sorrow； and the little offense is brooded over till； in the hot…bed
of rumination； it grows into a great injury； under whose poisonous shadow
springs up hatred and revenge。
Swearing relieves the feelingsthat is what swearing does。 I explained
this to my aunt on one occasion； but it didn't answer with her。 She said I
had no business to have such feelings。
That is what I told Tittums。 I told her she ought to be ashamed of
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THE IDLE THOUGHTS OF AN IDLE FELLOW。
herself； brought up in at Christian family as she was； too。 I don't so much
mind hearing an old cat swear； but I can't bear to see a mere kitten give
way to it。 It seems sad in one so young。
I put Tittums in my pocket and returned to my desk。 I forgot her for the
moment； and when I looked I found that she had squirmed out of my
pocket on to the table and was trying to swallow the pen； then she put her
leg into the ink…pot and upset it； then she licked her leg； then she swore
againat me this time。
I put her down on the floor； and there Tim began rowing with her。 I do
wish Tim would mind his own business。 It was no concern of his what she
had been doing。 Besides； he is not a saint himself。 He is only a two…year…
old fox…terrier； and he interferes with everything and gives himself the airs
of a gray…headed Scotch collie。
Tittums' mother has come in and Tim has got his nose scratched； for
which I am remarkably glad。 I have put them all three out in the passage；
where they are fighting at the present moment。 I'm in a mess with the ink
and in a thundering bad temper； and if anything more in the cat or dog line
comes fooling about me this morning； it had better bring its own funeral
contractor with it。
Yet； in general； I like cats and dogs very much indeed。 What jolly
chaps they are！ They are much superior to human beings as companions。
They do not quarrel or argue with you。 They never talk about themselves
but listen to you while you talk about yourself； and keep up an appearance
of being interested in the conversation。 They never make stupid remarks。
They never observe to Miss Brown across a dinner…table that they always
understood she was very sweet on Mr。
