the crime of sylvestre bonnard(西维斯特·博拉德的罪行)-第30节
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past the age for playing at skipping。 But when the servant said there was
an old gentleman。。。oh！。。。I mean。。。that a gentleman was waiting for me in
the parlour； I was making the little girls jump。 Then I tied the rope round
my waist in a hurry； so that it might not get lost。 It was wrong。 But I have
not been in the habit of having many people come to see me。 And
Mademoiselle Prefere never lets us off if we commit any breach of
deportment： so I know she is going to punish me； and I am very sorry
about it。〃。。。
〃That is too bad； Jeanne！〃
She became very grave； and said；
〃Yes； Monsieur； it is too bad； because when I am punished myself； I
have no more authority over the little girls。〃
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I did not at once fully understand the nature of this unpleasantness； but
Jeanne explained to me that； as she was charged by Mademoiselle Prefere
with the duties of taking care of the youngest class； of washing and
dressing the children； of teaching them how to behave； how to sew； how to
say the alphabet； of showing them how to play； and； finally； of putting
them to bed at the close of the day； she could not make herself obeyed by
those turbulent little folks on the days she was condemned to wear a night…
cap in the class…room； or to eat her meals standing up； from a plate turned
upside down。
Having secretly admired the punishments devised by the Lady of the
Enchanted Pelerine； I responded：
〃Then； if I understand you rightly； Jeanne； you are at once a pupil here
and a mistress？ It is a condition of existence very common in the world。
You are punished； and you punish？〃
〃Oh； Monsieur！〃 she exclaimed。 〃No！ I never punish！〃
〃Then； I suspect；〃 said I； 〃that your indulgence gets you many
scoldings from Mademoiselle Prefere？〃
She smiled； and blinked。
Then I said to her that the troubles in which we often involve ourselves；
by trying to act according to our conscience and to do the best we can； are
never of the sort that totally dishearten and weary us； but are； on the
contrary； wholesome trials。 This sort of philosophy touched her very little。
She even appeared totally unmoved by my moral exhortations。 But was
not this quite natural on her part？and ought I not to have remembered
that it is only those no longer innocent who can find pleasure in the
systems of moralists？。。。 I had at least good sense enough to cut short my
sermonising。
〃Jeanne；〃 I said； 〃you were asking a moment ago about Madame de
Gabry。 Let us talk about that Fairy of yours She was very prettily made。
Do you do any modelling in wax now？〃
〃I have not a bit of wax；〃 she exclaimed； wringing her hands〃no wax
at all！〃
〃No wax！〃 I cried〃in a republic of busy bees？〃
She laughed。
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〃And； then； you see； Monsieur； my FIGURINES； as you call them； are
not in Mademoiselle Prefere's programme。 But I had begun to make a very
small Saint…George for Madame de Gabrya tiny little Saint…George； with
a golden cuirass。 Is not that right； Monsieur Bonnardto give Saint…
George a gold cuirass？〃
〃Quite right； Jeanne； but what became of it？〃
〃I am going to tell you； I kept it in my pocket because I had no other
place to put it； andand I sat down on it by mistake。〃
She drew out of her pocket a little wax figure； which had been
squeezed out of all resemblance to human form； and of which the
dislocated limbs were only attached to the body by their wire framework。
At the sight of her hero thus marred； she was seized at once with
compassion and gaiety。 The latter feeling obtained the mastery； and she
burst into a clear laugh； which； however； stopped as suddenly as it had
begun。
Mademoiselle Prefere stood at the parlour door； smiling。
〃That dear child！〃 sighed the schoolmistress in her tenderest tone。 〃I
am afraid she will tire you。 And； then； your time is so precious！〃
I begged Mademoiselle Prefere to dismiss that illusion； and； rising to
take my leave； I took from my pocket some chocolate…cakes and sweets
which I had brought with me。
〃That is so nice！〃 said Jeanne； 〃there will be enough to go round the
whole school。〃
The lady of the pelerine intervened。
〃Mademoiselle Alexandre；〃 she said； 〃thank Monsieur for his
generosity。〃
Jeanne looked at her for an instant in a sullen way； then； turning to me；
said with remarkable firmness；
〃Monsieur； I thank you for your kindness in coming to see me。〃
〃Jeanne；〃 I said； pressing both her hands； 〃remain always a good；
truthful； brave girl。 Good…bye。〃
As she left the room with her packages of chocolate and confectionery；
she happened to strike the handles of her skipping… rope against the back
of a chair。 Mademoiselle Prefere； full of indignation； pressed both hands
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over her heart； under her pelerine； and I almost expected to see her give up
her scholastic ghost。
When we found ourselves alone； she recovered her composure； and I
must say； without considering myself thereby flattered； that she smiled
upon me with one whole side of her face。
〃Mademoiselle；〃 I said； taking advantage of her good humour； 〃I
noticed that Jeanne Alexandre looks a little pale。 You know better than I
how much consideration and care a young girl requires at her age。 It would
only be doing you an injustice by implication to recommend her still more
earnestly to your vigilance。〃
These words seemed to ravish her with delight。 She lifted her eyes； as
in ecstasy； to the paper spirals of the ceiling； and； clasping her hands
exclaimed；
〃How well these eminent men know the art of considering the most
trifling details！〃
I called her attention to the fact that the health of a young girl was not
a trifling detail； and made my farewell bow。 But she stopped me on the
threshold to say to me； very confidentially；
〃You must excuse me； Monsieur。 I am a woman； and I love gloy。 I
cannot conceal from you the fact that I feel myself greatly honoured by the
presence of a Member of the Institute in my humble institution。〃
I duly excused the weakness of Mademoiselle Prefere； and； thinking
only of Jeanne； with the blindness of egotism； kept asking myself all along
the road； 〃What are we going to do with this child？〃
June 3。
I had escorted to the Cimetiere de Marnes that day a very aged
colleague of mine who； to use the words of Goethe； had consented to die。
The great Goethe； whose own vital force was something extraordinary；
actually believed that one never dies until one really wants to diethat is
to say； when all those energies which resist dissolution； and teh sum of
which make up life itself； have been totally destroyed。 In other words； he
believed that people only die when it is no longer possible for them to live。
Good！ it is merely a question of properly understanding one another； and
when fully comprehended； the magnificent idea of Goethe only brings us
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quietly back to the song of La Palisse。
Well； my excellent colleague had consented to diethanks to several
successive attacks of extremely persuasive apoplexythe last of which
proved unanswerable。 I had been very little acquainted with him during his
lifetime； but it seems that I became his friend the moment he was dead； for
our colleagues assured me in a most serious manner； with deeply
sympathetic countenances； that I should act as one of the pall…bearers； and
deliver an address over the tomb。
After having read very badly a short address I had written as well as I
couldwhich is not saying much for itI started out
