donal grant-第47节

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


seeing　him　so　seldom　that　he　had　almost　come　to　represent　the　ghost
some　said　lived　in　the　invisible　room　and　haunted　the　castle。

It　was　the　easier　for　Eppy　to　go　home　that　her　grandmother　needed
her；　and　that　her　grandfather　would　not　be　able　to　say　much　to　her。
She　was　an　affectionate　girl；　and　yet　her　grandfather's　condition
roused　in　her　no　indignation；　for　the　love　of　being　loved　is　such　a
blinding　thing；　that　the　greatest　injustice　from　the　dearest　to　the
next　dearest　will　by　some　natures　be　readily　tolerated。　God　help　us！
we　are　a　mean　setand　meanest　the　man　who　is　ablest　to　justify
himself！

Mrs。　Brookes；　having　prepared　a　heavy　basket　of　good　things　for　Eppy
to　carry　home　to　her　grandmother；　and　made　it　the　heavier　for　the
sake　of　punishing　her　with　the　weight　of　it；　set　out　with　her；
saying　to　herself；

〃The　jaud　wants　a　wheen　harder　wark　nor　I　hae　hauden　till　her　han'；
an'　doobtless　it's　preparin'　for　her！〃

She　was　kindly　received；　without　a　word　of　reproach；　by　her
grandmother；　the　sufferer；　forgetful　of；　or　forgiving　her　words　of
rejection　in　the　garden；　smiled　when　she　came　near　his　bedside；　and
she　turned　away　to　conceal　the　tears　she　could　not　repress。　She
loved　her　grand…parents；　and　she　loved　the　young　lord；　and　she　could
not　get　the　two　loves　to　dwell　together　peaceably　in　her　minda
common　difficulty　with　our　weak；　easily　divided；　hardly　united
naturesfrangible；　friable；　readily　distorted！　It　needs　no　less
than　God　himself；　not　only　to　unite　us　to　one　another；　but　to　make　a
whole　of　the　ill…fitting；　roughly　disjointed　portions　of　our
individual　beings。　Tearfully　but　diligently　she　set　about　her
duties；　and　not　only　the　heart；　but　the　limbs　and　joints　of　her
grandmother　were　relieved　by　her　presence；　while　doubtless　she
herself　found　some　refuge　from　anxious　thought　in　the　service　she
rendered。　What　she　saw　as　her　probable　future；　I　cannot　say；　one
hour　her　confidence　in　her　lover's　faithfulness　would　be　complete；
the　next　it　would　be　dashed　with　huge　blots　of　uncertainty；　but　her
grandmother　rejoiced　over　her　as　out　of　harm's　way。




CHAPTER　XXXVII。

LORD　FORGUE　AND　LADY　ARCTURA。

At　the　castle　things　fell　into　their　old　routine。　Nothing　had　been
arranged　between　lord　Forgue　and　Eppy；　and　he　seemed　content　that　it
should　be　so。　Mrs。　Brookes　told　him　that　she　had　gone　home：　he　made
neither　remark　nor　inquiry；　manifesting　no　interest。

It　would　be　well　his　father　should　not　see　it　necessary　to　push
things　farther！　He　did　not　want　to　turn　out　of　the　castle！　Without
means；　what　was　he　to　do？　The　marriage　could　not　be　to…day　or
to…morrow！　and　in　the　meantime　he　could　see　Eppy；　perhaps　more
easily　than　at　the　castle！　He　would　contrive！　He　was　sorry　he　had
hurt　the　old　fellow；　but　he　could　not　help　it！　he　would　get　in　the
way！　Things　would　have　been　much　worse　if　he　had　not　got　first　to
his　father！　He　would　wait　a　bit；　and　see　what　would　turn　up！　For　the
tutor…fellow；　he　must　not　quarrel　with　him　downright！　No　good　would
come　of　that！　In　the　end　he　would　have　his　way！　and　that　in　spite　of
them　all！

But　what　he　really　wanted　he　did　not　know。　He　only　knew；　or
imagined；　that　he　was　over　head　and　ears　in　love　with　the　girl：　what
was　to　come　of　it　was　all　in　the　clouds。　He　had　said　he　meant　to
marry　her；　but　to　that　statement　he　had　been　driven；　more　than　he
knew；　by　the　desire　to　escape　the　contempt　of　the　tutor　he　scorned；
and　he　rejoiced　that　he　had　at　least　discomfited　him。　He　knew　that
if　he　did　marry　Eppy；　or　any　one　else　of　whom　his　father　did　not
approve；　he　had　nothing　to　look　for　but　absolute　poverty；　for　he
knew　no　way　to　earn　money；　he　was　therefore　unprepared　to　defy　him
immediatelywhatever　he　might　do　by　and　by。　He　said　to　himself
sometimes　that　he　was　as　willing　as　any　man　to　work　for　his　wife　if
only　he　knew　how；　but　when　he　said　so；　had　he　always　a　clear　vision
of　Eppy　as　the　wife　in　prospect？　Alas；　it　would　take　years　to　make
him　able　to　earn　even　a　woman's　wages！　It　would　be　a　fine　thing　for
a　lord　to　labour　like　a　common　man　for　the　support　of　a　child　of　the
people　for　whom　he　had　sacrificed　everything；　but　where　was　the
possibility？　When　thoughts　like　these　grew　too　many　for　him；　Forgue
wished　he　had　never　seen　the　girl。　His　heart　would　immediately
reproach　him；　immediately　he　would　comfort　his　conscience　with　the
reflection　that　to　wish　he　had　never　seen　her　was　a　very　different
thing　from　wishing　to　act　as　if　he　had。　He　loafed　about　in　her
neighbourhood　as　much　as　he　dared；　haunted　the　house　itself　in　the
twilight；　and　at　night　even　ventured　sometimes　to　creep　up　the
stair；　but　for　some　time　he　never　even　saw　her：　for　days　Eppy　never
went　out　of　doors　except　into　the　garden。

Though　she　had　not　spoken　of　it；　Arctura　had　had　more　than　a
suspicion　that　something　was　going　on　between　her　cousin　and　the
pretty　maid；　for　the　little　window　of　her　sitting　room　partially
overlooked　a　certain　retired　spot　favoured　of　the　lovers；　and　after
Eppy　left　the　house；　Davie；　though　he　did　not　associate　the　facts；
noted　that　she　was　more　cheerful　than　before。　But　there　was　no
enlargement　of　intercourse　between　her　and　Forgue。　They　knew　it　was
the　wish　of　the　head　of　the　house　that　they　should　marry；　but　the
earl　had　been　wise　enough　to　say　nothing　openly　to　either　of　them：
he　believed　the　thing　would　have　a　better　chance　on　its　own　merits；
and　as　yet　they　had　shown　no　sign　of　drawing　to　each　other。　It
might；　perhaps；　have　been　otherwise　on　his　part　had　not　the　young
lord　been　taken　with　the　pretty　housemaid；　though　at　first　he　had
thought　of　nothing　more　than　a　little　passing　flirtation；　reckoning
his　advantage　with　her　by　the　height　on　which　he　stood　in　his　own
regard；　but　it　was　from　no　jealousy　that　Arctura　was　relieved　by　the
departure　of　Eppy。　She　had　never　seen　anything　attractive　in　her
cousin；　and　her　religious　impressions　would　have　been　enough　to
protect　her　from　any　drawing　to　him：　had　they　not　poisoned　in　her
even　the　virtue　of　common　house…friendliness　toward　a　very　different
man？　The　sense　of　relief　she　had　when　Eppy　went；　lay　in　being
delivered　from　the　presence　of　something　clandestine；　with　which　she
could　not　interfere　so　far　as　to　confess　knowledge　of　it。　It　had
rendered　her　uneasy；　she　had　felt　shy　and　uncomfortable。　Once　or
twice　she　had　been　on　the　point　of　saying　to　Mrs。　Brookes　that　she
thought　her　cousin　and　Eppy　very　oddly　familiar；　but　had　failed　of
courage。　It　was　no　wonder　therefore　that　she　should　be　more
cheerful。




CHAPTER　XXXVIII。

ARCTURA　AND　SOPHIA。

About　this　time　her　friend；　Miss　Carmichael；　returned　from　a　rather
lengthened　visit。　But　after　the　atonement　that　had　taken　place
between　her　and　Donal；　it　was　with　some　anxiety　that　lady　Arctura
looked　forward　to　seeing　her。　She　shrank　from　telling　her　what　had
come　about　through　the　wonderful　poem；　as　she　thought　it；　which　had
so　bewitched　her。　She　shrank　too　from　showing　her　the　verses：　they
were　not　of　a　kind；　she　was　sure；　to　meet　with　recognition　from　her。
She　knew　she　would　make　game　of　them；　and　that　not　good…humouredly
like　Kate；　who　yet　confessed　to　some　beauty　in　them。　For　herself；
the　poem　and　the　study　of　its　growth　had　ministered　so　much
nourishment　to　certain　healthy　poetic　seeds　lying　hard　and　dry　in
her　bosom；　that　they　had　begun　to　sprout；　indeed　to　shoot　rapidly
up。　Donal's　poem　could　not　fail　therefore　to　be　to　her　thenceforward
something　sacred。　A　related　result　also　was　that　it　had　made　her
aware　of　something　very　defective　in　her　friend's　constitution：　she
did　not　know　whether　in　her　constitution　mental；　moral；　or
spiritual：　probably　it　was　in　all　three。　Doubtless；　thought　Arctura；
she　knew　most　things　better　than　she；　and　certainly　had　a　great　deal
more　common　sense；　but；　on　the　other　hand；　was　she　not　satisfied
with　far　less　than　she　could　be　satisfied　with？　To　believe　as　her
friend　believed　would　not　save　her　from　insanity！　She　must　be　made
on　a　smaller　scale　of　necessities　than　herself！　How　was　she　able　to
love　the　God　she　said　she　believed　in？　God　should　at　least　be　as
beautiful　as　his　creature　could　imagine　him！　But　Miss　Carmichael
would　say　her　poor　earthly　imagination　was　not　to　occupy　itself　with
such　a　high　subject！　Oh；　why　would　not　God　tell　her　something　about
himselfsomething　directstraight　from　himself？　Why　should　she
only　hear　of　him　at　second　handalways　and　always？

Alas；　poor　girl！　second　hand？　Five　hundredth　hand　rather？　And　she
might　have　been　all　the　time　communing　with　the　very　God　himself；
manifest　in　his　own　shape；　which　is　ours　also！all　the　time
learning　that　her　imagination　could　nevernot　to　say　originate；
but；　when　presented；　receive　into　it　the　unspeakable　excess　of　his
loveliness；　of　his　absolute　devotion　and　tenderness　to　the
creatures；　the　children　of　his　father！

In　the　absence　of　Miss　Carmichael　she　had　thought　with　less
oppression　of　many　things　that　in　her　presence　appeared
ghastly…hopeless；　now　in　the　prospect　of　her　reappearance　she　began
to　feel　wicked　in　daring　a　thought　of　her　own　concerning　the　God
that　was　nearer　to　her　than　her　thoughts！　Such　an　unhealthy　mastery
had　she　gained　over　her！　What　if　they　met　Donal；　a