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strength      of  these    profound     views�察   �he   in  the   most     ingenious 

manner takes infinite pains to counterplot�察�when there is no plot�察�

and plays the deepest games of chess without any adversary。 

    It  is   a source   of  much  gratification   to  Mr  Guppy�察  �therefore�察  �to 

find the newcomer constantly poring over the papers in Jarndyce 

and  Jarndyce�察  �for  he   well knows   that  nothing   but   confusion   and 

failure can come of that。 His satisfaction communicates itself to a 

third saunterer through the long vacation in Kenge and Carboy¨s 

office�察�to wit�察�Young Smallweed。 

    Whether   Young   Smallweed   ��metaphorically   called   Small   and 

eke  Chick   Weed�察 �as   it  were  jocularly  to   express   a   fledgling�撮�   was 

ever a boy�察�is much doubted in Lincoln¨s Inn。 He is now something 

under     fifteen�察  �and    an   old  limb    of  the   law。   He   is  facetiously 

understood to entertain a passion for a lady at a cigar shop�察�in the 

neighbourhood of Chancery Lane�察�and for her sake to have broken 

off   a   contract   with   another   lady�察  �to   whom   he   had   been   engaged 

some years。 He is a town´made article�察�of small statute and weazen 

features�察  �but   may   be   perceived   from   a   considerable   distance   by 

means of his very tall hat。 To become a Guppy is the object of his 

ambition。       He    dresses    at   that    gentleman       ��by   whom      he    is 

patronised���察�talks at him�察�walks at him�察�founds himself entirely on 

him。 He is honoured with Mr Guppy¨s particular confidence�察�and 

occasionally advises him�察�from the deep wells of his experience�察�on 

difficult points in private life。 

    Mr Guppy has been lolling out of window all the morning�察�after 

trying all the stools in succession and finding more of them easy�察�



Charles Dickens                                                     ElecBook Classics 


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                                  Bleak House                                    382 



and after several times putting his head into the iron   safe   with  a 

notion of cooling it。 Mr Smallweed has been twice despatched for 

effervescent drinks�察�and has twice mixed them in the   two  official 

tumblers       and    stirred    them    up    with    the   ruler。   Mr    Guppy 

propounds�察  �for   Mr   Smallweed¨s   consideration�察  �the   paradox   that 

the   more   you   drink   the   thirstier   you   are�察  �and   reclines   his   head 

upon the window´sill in a state of hopeless languor。 

   While thus looking out into the shade of Old Square�察�Lincoln¨s 

Inn�察   �surveying     the   intolerable    bricks    and    mortar�察   �Mr   Guppy 

becomes       conscious      of  a   manly    whisker      emerging      from    the 

cloistered walk below�察�and turning itself up in the direction of his 

face。   At   the   same   time�察  �a   low   whistle   is   wafted   through   the   Inn�察�

and a suppressed voice cries�察 �Hip� �Gup´py� 院�

    ^Why�察  �you   don¨t   mean   it�拭院  �says   Mr   Guppy�察  �aroused。   ^Small� �

Here¨s Jobling� 院�Small¨s head looks out of window too�察�and nods to 

Jobling。 

    ^Where have you sprung up from�拭院�inquires Mr Guppy。 

    ^From   the   market´gardens   down   by   Deptford。   I   can¨t   stand   it 

any longer。 I must enlist。 I say� �I wish you¨d lend me half´a´crown。 

Upon my soul I¨m hungry。 ̄ 

   Jobling   looks   hungry�察  �and   also   has   the   appearance   of   having 

run to seed in the market´gardens down by Deptford。 

    ^I say� �Just throw out half´a´crown�察�if you have got one to spare。 

I want to get some dinner。 ̄ 

    ^Will you come and   dine  with  me�拭院  �says  Mr  Guppy�察  �throwing 

out the coin�察�which Mr Jobling catches neatly。 

    ^How long should I have to hold out�拭院�says Jobling。 

    ^Not half an hour。 I am only waiting here till the enemy goes�察院�

returns Mr Guppy�察�butting inward with his head。 



Charles Dickens                                                     ElecBook Classics 


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                                 Bleak House                                 383 



   ^What enemy�拭院�

   ^A new one。 Going to be articled。 Will you wait�拭院�

   ^Can you give a fellow anything to read in the meantime�拭院�says 

Mr Jobling。 

   Smallweed       suggests    the  Law   List。  But   Mr   Jobling   declares�察�

with much earnestness�察�that he ^can¨t stand it。 ̄ 

   ^You shall have the paper�察院�says Mr Guppy。 ^He shall bring it 

down。     But   you   had  better   not   be  seen  about   here。   Sit  on  our 

staircase and read。 It¨s a quiet place。 ̄ 

   Jobling     nods   intelligence    and   acquiescence。      The   sagacious 

Smallweed       supplies   him   with   the  newspaper�察    �and   occasionally 

drops his eye upon him from the landing as a precaution against 

his   becoming     disgusted    with   waiting�察  �and   makes     an  untimely 

departure。 At last the enemy retreats�察�and then Smallweed fetches 

Mr Jobling up。 

   ^Well�察�and how are you�拭院�says Mr Guppy�察�shaking hands with 

him。 

   ^So�察�so。 How are you�拭院�

   Mr Guppy replying that he is not much to boast of�察�Mr Jobling 

ventures on the question�察 �How is she�拭院�This Mr Guppy resents as 

a   liberty�察 �retorting�察   �Jobling�察   �there   are  chords    in  the  human 

mind! ̄ Jobling begs pardon。 

   ^Any      subject   but   that� 院  �says   Mr    Guppy�察   �with    a  gloomy 

enjoyment      of  his  injury。  ^For   there   are  chords�察  �Jobling! ̄     Mr 

Jobling begs pardon again。 

   During this short colloquy�察�the active Smallweed�察�who is of the 

dinner   party�察  �has   written   in   legal   characters   on   a   slip   of   paper�察�

^Return      immediately。 ̄      This   notification   to  all  whom     it  may 

concern�察�he inserts in the letter´box�察�and then putting on the tall 



Charles Dickens                                                 ElecBook Classics 


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                                   Bleak House                                     384 



hat�察  �at   the  angle   of   inclination   at  which     Mr   Guppy     wears    his�察�

informs his patron that they may now make themselves scarce。 

    Accordingly  they  betake   themselves   to  a neighbouring  dining´ 

house�察     �of   the   class    known      among      its   frequenters      by    the 

denomination   Slap´Bang�察  �where   the   waitress�察  �a   bouncing   young 

female of forty�察�is supposed to have made some impression on the 

susceptible Smallweed�察�of whom it may be remarked that he is a 

weird      changeling�察     �to   whom      years     are   nothing。     He     stands 

precociously  possessed   of  centuries   of   owlish   wisdom。   If   he   ever 

lay in a cradle�察�it seems as if he must have lain there in a tail´coat。 

He has an old�察�old eye�察�has Smallweed�察�and he drinks�察�and smokes�察�

in a   monkeyish  way�察�and   his neck   is   stiff   in   his   collar�察  �and   he   is 

never to be taken in�察�and he knows all about it�察�whatever it is。 In 

short�察   �in  his   bringing   up�察  �he   has   been    so   nursed   by   Law    and 

Equity   that   he   has   become   a   kind   of   fossil   Imp�察  �to   account   for 

whose terrestrial existence it is reported at the public offices that 

his father was John Doe�察�and his mother the only female member 

of the Roe family�此�also that his first long´clothes were made from a 

blue bag。 

    Into the Dining House�察�unaffected by the seductive show in the 

window�察�of artificially whitened cauliflowers and poultry�察�verdant 

baskets of  peas�察�coolly blooming cucumbers�察�and  joints  ready  for 

the spit�察�Mr Smallweed leads the way。 They know him there�察�and 

defer to him。 He has his favourite box�察�he bespeaks all the papers�察�

he   is   down   upon bald   patriarchs�察  �who   keep   them   more   than   ten 

minutes afterwards。   It is   of  no  use   trying  him   with anything less 

than   a   full´sized   ^bread�察院  �or   proposing   to   him   any   joint   in   cut�察�

unless     it   is  in  the  very  best  cut。  In   the  matter     of  gravy   he   is 

adamant。 



Charles Dickens                                                      ElecBook Classics 


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                                    Bleak House                                      385 



    Conscious       of  his   elfin   power�察   �and    submitting      to  his   dread 

experience�察  �Mr   Guppy   consults   him   in   the   choice   of   that   day¨s 

banquet�察  �turning   an   appealing  look   towards   him   as   the   waitress 

repeats   the   catalogue   of   viands�察  �and   saying   ^What   do   you   take�察�

Chick�拭院  �Chick�察  �out  of  the  profundity  of  his artfulness�察  �preferring 

^veal     and   ham     and    French     beans!And         don¨t    you   forget    the 

stuffing�察�Polly�察院。�with an unearthly cock of his venerable eye���察�Mr 

Guppy and Mr Jobling give the like order。 T

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