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desolate for a quarter of a century�察�plants himself in a good place 

and keeps an eye on the Judge�察�ready to call out ^My Lord� 院�in a 

voice   of   sonorous   complaint�察  �on   the   instant   of   his   rising。   A   few 

lawyers¨ clerks and others who know this suitor by sight�察�linger�察�on 

the chance of his furnishing some fun�察�and enlivening the dismal 

weather a little。 

    Jarndyce and Jarndyce drones on。 This scarecrow of a suit has�察�

in course of time�察�become so complicated�察�that no man alive knows 

what it means。 The parties to it understand it least�察�but it has been 

observed that  no  two  Chancery  lawyers   can   talk   about  it  for  five 

minutes�察     �without    coming     to  a  total   disagreement       as  to  all  the 

premises。   Innumerable   children   have   been   born   into   the   cause�察�

innumerable young people have married into it�察�innumerable old 

people have died out of it。 Scores of persons have deliriously found 

themselves       made     parties    in   Jarndyce      and   Jarndyce�察     �without 

knowing   how   or   why�察      �whole     families   have    inherited    legendary 

hatreds   with   the   suit。   The   little   plaintiff   or   defendant�察  �who   was 

promised       a  new     rocking´horse      when     Jarndyce      and    Jarndyce 

should be settled�察�has grown up�察�possessed himself of a real horse�察�

and   trotted   away   into   the   other   world。   Fair   wards   of   court   have 

faded     into   mothers      and    grandmothers�察       �a  long    procession     of 

Chancellors has come in and gone out�察�the legion of bills in the suit 

have been transformed into mere bills of mortality�察�there are not 

three     Jarndyces      left  upon    the   earth   perhaps�察    �since    old   Tom 



Charles Dickens                                                      ElecBook Classics 


´ Page 13´

                                    Bleak House                                      13 



Jarndyce       in  despair     blew   his   brains    out   at  a  coffee´house      in 

Chancery   Lane�察  �but   Jarndyce   and   Jarndyce   still   drags   its   weary 

length before the Court�察�perennially hopeless。 

    Jarndyce and Jarndyce has passed into a joke。 That is the only 

good that has ever come of it。 It has been death to many�察�but it is a 

joke    in   the  profession。     Every     master     in  Chancery      has   had    a 

reference out of it。 Every master in Chancery has had a reference 

out   of   it。   Every   Chancellor   was   ^in   it�察院  �for   somebody   or   other�察�

when he was counsel at the bar。 Good things have been said about 

it by blue´nosed�察�bulbous´shoed old benchers�察�in  select port´wine 

committee   after   dinner   in   hall。   Articled   clerks   have   been   in   the 

habit of fleshing their legal wit upon it。 The last Lord Chancellor 

handled   it   neatly   when�察  �correcting   Mr   Blowers   the   eminent   silk 

gown      who   said   that   such   a   thing   might   happen      when     the  sky 

rained   potatoes�察  �he   observed   ^or   when   we   get   through   Jarndyce 

and Jarndyce�察�Mr Blowers�察院�a pleasantry that particularly tickled 

the maces�察�bags�察�and purses。 

    How  many  people   out  of   the   suit�察  �Jarndyce   and   Jarndyce   has 

stretched forth its unwholesome hand to spoil and corrupt�察�would 

be a very wide   question。   From  the   master�察  �upon   whose   impaling 

files   reams     of  dusty   warrants      in  Jarndyce      and   Jarndyce      have 

grimly writhed into many shapes�察�down to the copying clerk in the 

Six    Clerks¨    Office�察   �who    has   copied     his  tens    of  thousands      of 

Chancery´folio´pages under that eternal heading�察�no man¨s nature 

has   been made   better  by  it。   In   trickery�察  �evasion�察  �procrastination�察�

spoliation�察�botheration�察�under false pretences of all sorts�察�there are 

influences that can never come to good。 The very  solicitors¨ boys 

who have kept the wretched suitors at bay�察�by protesting time out 

of   mind   that   Mr   Chizzle�察  �Mizzle�察  �or   otherwise�察  �was   particularly 



Charles Dickens                                                       ElecBook Classics 


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                                   Bleak House                                     14 



engaged   and      had    appointments       until  dinner�察   �may    have   got   an 

extra moral twist and shuffle into themselves out of Jarndyce and 

Jarndyce。 The receiver in the cause has acquired a goodly sum of 

money   by   it�察  �but   has   acquired   too   a   distrust   of   his   own   mother�察�

and a contempt for his own kind。 Chizzle�察�Mizzle�察�and   otherwise�察�

have lapsed into a habit of vaguely promising themselves that they 

will look   into  that  outstanding little   matter�察  �and   see   what can   be 

done   for   Drizzle!who   was   not   well        used!when   Jarndyce   and 

Jarndyce shall be got out of the   office。   Shirking  and   sharking�察  �in 

all their many varieties�察�have been sown broadcast by the ill´fated 

cause�察�and even those who have contemplated its history from the 

outermost circle of such evil�察�have been insensibly tempted into a 

loose way of letting bad things alone to take their own bad course�察�

and   a   loose   belief  that   if  the  world   go   wrong�察   �it   was�察  �in   some 

offhand manner�察�never meant to go right。 

    Thus�察�in the midst of the mud and at  the   heart  of  the   fog�察  �sits 

the Lord High Chancellor in his High Court of Chancery。 

    ^Mr Tangle�察院�says the Lord High Chancellor�察�latterly something 

restless under the eloquence of that learned gentleman。 

    ^Mlud�察院  �says   Mr   Tangle。   Mr   Tangle   knows   more   of   Jarndyce 

and Jarndyce than anybody。 He is famous for it!supposed never 

to have read anything else since he left school。 

    ^Have you nearly concluded your argument�拭院�

    ^Mlud�察     �no!variety       of  points!feel       it  my    duty    tsubmit! 

ludship�察院�is the reply that slides out of Mr Tangle。 

    ^Several members   of   the   bar   are   still   to  be   heard�察  �I   believe�拭院�

says the Chancellor�察�with a slight smile。 

    Eighteen   of   Mr   Tangle¨s   learned   friends�察  �each   armed   with   a 

little   summary   of   eighteen   hundred   sheets�察  �bob   up   like   eighteen 



Charles Dickens                                                     ElecBook Classics 


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                                   Bleak House                                     15 



hammers in a pianoforte�察�make eighteen bows�察�and drop into their 

eighteen places of obscurity。 

    ^We   will   proceed   with   the   hearing   on   Wednesday   fortnight�察院�

says the Chancellor。 For�察�the question at issue is only a question of 

costs�察�a mere bud on the forest tree of the parent suit�察�and really 

will come to a settlement one of these days。 

    The    Chancellor      rises�察 �the  bar   rises�察 �the   prisoner    is  brought 

forward   in   a   hurry�察  �the   man   from   Shropshire   cries�察   �My   lord� 院�

Maces�察�bags�察�and purses�察�indignantly proclaim silence�察�and frown 

at the man from Shropshire。 

    ^In reference�察院�proceeds   the   Chancellor�察  �still  on   Jarndyce and 

Jarndyce�察 �to the young girl! ̄ 

    ^Begludship¨s pardon!boy�察院�says Mr Tangle�察�prematurely。 

    ^In     reference�察院      �proceeds       the    Chancellor�察      �with     extra 

distinctness�察 �to the young girl and boy�察�the two young people。 ̄ 

    ��Mr   Tangle   crushed。��   ^Whom   I   directed   to   be   in      attendance 

today�察�and who are now in my private room�察  �I   will see   them   and 

satisfy  myself  as   to  the   expediency  of  making   the   order   for   their 

residing with their uncle。 ̄ 

    Mr Tangle on his legs again。 

    ^Begludship¨s pardon!dead。 ̄ 

    ^With their�察院�Chancellor looking through his double eyeglass at 

the papers on his desk�察 �grandfather。 ̄ 

    ^Begludship¨s pardon!victim of rash action!brains。 ̄ 

    Suddenly a very little counsel�察�with a terrific bass voice�察�arises�察�

fully   inflated�察  �in   the   back   settlements   of   the   fog�察  �and   says�察   �Will 

your lordship allow me�拭�I appear for him。 He is a cousin�察�several 

times   removed。   I   am   not   at   the   moment   prepared   to   inform   the 

Court in what exact remove he is a cousin�察�but he is a cousin。 ̄ 



Charles Dickens                                                     ElecBook Classics 


´ Page 16´

                                  Bleak House                                     16 



    Leaving     this   address    ��delivered     like  a  sepulchral     message�� 

ringing in the rafters of the roof�察�the very little counsel drops�察�and 

the fog knows him no more。 Everybody looks for him。 Nobody can 

see him。 

    ^I will speak with both the young people�察院�says the Chancellor 

anew�察   �and   sat

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