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第43节

a room with a view-第43节

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will be wasted。 You have gone too far to retreat。 I have no time

for the tenderness; and the comradeship; and the poetry; and the

things that really matter; and for which you marry。 I know that;

with George; you will find them; and that you love him。 Then be

his wife。 He is already part of you。 Though you fly to Greece;

and never see him again; or forget his very name; George will

work in your thoughts till you die。 It isn't possible to love and

to part。 You will wish that it was。 You can transmute love;

ignore it; muddle it; but you can never pull it out of you。 I

know by experience that the poets are right: love is eternal。〃



Lucy began to cry with anger; and though her anger passed away

soon; her tears remained。



〃I only wish poets would say this; too: love is of the body; not

the body; but of the body。 Ah! the misery that would be saved if

we confessed that! Ah! for a little directness to liberate the

soul! Your soul; dear Lucy! I hate the word now; because of all

the cant with which superstition has wrapped it round。 But we

have souls。 I cannot say how they came nor whither they go; but

we have them; and I see you ruining yours。 I cannot bear it。 It

is again the darkness creeping in; it is hell。〃 Then he checked

himself。 〃What nonsense I have talkedhow abstract and remote!

And I have made you cry! Dear girl; forgive my prosiness; marry

my boy。 When I think what life is; and how seldom love is

answered by loveMarry him; it is one of the moments for which

the world was made。〃



She could not understand him; the words were indeed remote。 Yet

as he spoke the darkness was withdrawn; veil after veil; and she

saw to the bottom of her soul。



〃Then; Lucy〃



〃You've frightened me;〃 she moaned。 〃CecilMr。 Beebethe

ticket's boughteverything。〃 She fell sobbing into the chair。

〃I'm caught in the tangle。 I must suffer and grow old away from

him。 I cannot break the whole of life for his sake。 They trusted

me。〃



A carriage drew up at the front…door。



〃Give George my loveonce only。 Tell him 'muddle。'〃 Then she

arranged her veil; while the tears poured over her cheeks inside。



〃Lucy〃



〃Nothey are in the halloh; please not; Mr。 Emersonthey trust

me〃



〃But why should they; when you have deceived them?〃



Mr。 Beebe opened the door; saying: 〃Here's my mother。〃



〃You're not worthy of their trust。〃



〃What's that?〃 said Mr。 Beebe sharply。



〃I was saying; why should you trust her when she deceived you?〃



〃One minute; mother。〃 He came in and shut the door。



〃I don't follow you; Mr。 Emerson。 To whom do you refer? Trust

whom?〃



〃I mean she has pretended to you that she did not love George。

They have loved one another all along。〃



Mr。 Beebe looked at the sobbing girl。 He was very quiet; and his

white face; with its ruddy whiskers; seemed suddenly inhuman。 A

long black column; he stood and awaited her reply。



〃I shall never marry him;〃 quavered Lucy。



A look of contempt came over him; and he said; 〃Why not?〃



〃Mr。 BeebeI have misled youI have misled myself〃



〃Oh; rubbish; Miss Honeychurch!〃



〃It is not rubbish!〃 said the old man hotly。 〃It's the part of

people that you don't understand。〃



Mr。 Beebe laid his hand on the old man's shoulder pleasantly。



〃Lucy! Lucy!〃 called voices from the carriage。



〃Mr。 Beebe; could you help me?〃



He looked amazed at the request; and said in a low; stern voice:

〃I am more grieved than I can possibly express。 It is lamentable;

lamentableincredible。〃



〃What's wrong with the boy?〃 fired up the other again。



〃Nothing; Mr。 Emerson; except that he no longer interests me。

Marry George; Miss Honeychurch。 He will do admirably。〃



He walked out and left them。 They heard him guiding his mother

up…stairs。



〃Lucy!〃 the voices called。



She turned to Mr。 Emerson in despair。 But his face revived her。 It

was the face of a saint who understood。



〃Now it is all dark。 Now Beauty and Passion seem never to have

existed。 I know。 But remember the mountains over Florence and the

view。 Ah; dear; if I were George; and gave you one kiss; it would

make you brave。 You have to go cold into a battle that needs

warmth; out into the muddle that you have made yourself; and your

mother and all your friends will despise you; oh; my darling; and

rightly; if it is ever right to despise。 George still dark; all

the tussle and the misery without a word from him。 Am I

justified?〃 Into his own eyes tears came。 〃Yes; for we fight for

more than Love or Pleasure; there is Truth。 Truth counts; Truth

does count。〃



〃You kiss me;〃 said the girl。 〃You kiss me。 I will try。〃



He gave her a sense of deities reconciled; a feeling that; in

gaining the man she loved; she would gain something for the whole

world。 Throughout the squalor of her homeward driveshe spoke at

oncehis salutation remained。 He had robbed the body of its

taint; the world's taunts of their sting; he had shown her the

holiness of direct desire。 She 〃never exactly understood;〃 she

would say in after years; 〃how he managed to strengthen her。 It

was as if he had made her see the whole of everything at once。〃







Chapter XX: The End of the Middle Ages



The Miss Alans did go to Greece; but they went by themselves。

They alone of this little company will double Malea and plough

the waters of the Saronic gulf。 They alone will visit Athens and

Delphi; and either shrine of intellectual songthat upon the

Acropolis; encircled by blue seas; that under Parnassus; where

the eagles build and the bronze charioteer drives undismayed

towards infinity。 Trembling; anxious; cumbered with much

digestive bread; they did proceed to Constantinople; they did go

round the world。 The rest of us must be contented with a fair;

but a less arduous; goal。 Italiam petimus: we return to the

Pension Bertolini。



George said it was his old room。



〃No; it isn't;〃 said Lucy; 〃because it is the room I had; and I

had your father's room。 I forget why; Charlotte made me; for some

reason。〃



He knelt on the tiled floor; and laid his face in her lap。



〃George; you baby; get up。〃



〃Why shouldn't I be a baby?〃 murmured George。



Unable to answer this question; she put down his sock; which she

was trying to mend; and gazed out through the window。 It was

evening and again the spring。



〃Oh; bother Charlotte;〃 she said thoughtfully。 〃What can such

people be made of?〃



〃Same stuff as parsons are made of。〃



〃Nonsense!〃



〃Quite right。 It is nonsense。〃



〃Now you get up off the cold floor; or you'll be starting

rheumatism next; and you stop laughing and being so silly。〃



〃Why shouldn't I laugh?〃 he asked; pinning her with his elbows;

and advancing his face to hers。 〃What's there to cry at? Kiss me

here。〃 He indicated the spot where a kiss would be welcome。



He was a boy after all。 When it came to the point; it was she who

remembered the past; she into whose soul the iron had entered;

she who knew whose room this had been last year。 It endeared him

to her strangely that he should be sometimes wrong。



〃Any letters?〃 he asked。



〃Just a line from Freddy。〃



〃Now kiss me here; then here。〃



Then; threatened again with rheumatism; he strolled to the

window; opened it (as the English will); and leant out。 There was

the parapet; there the river; there to the left the beginnings of

the hills。 The cab…driver; who at once saluted him with the hiss

of a serpent; might be that very Phaethon who had set this

happiness in motion twelve months ago。 A passion of gratitude

all feelings grow to passions in the Southcame over the

husband; and he blessed the people and the things who had taken

so much trouble about a young fool。 He had helped himself; it is

true; but how stupidly!



All the fighting that mattered had been done by othersby Italy;

by his father; by his wife。



〃Lucy; you come and look at the cypresses; and the church;

whatever its name is; still shows。〃



〃San Miniato。 I'll just finish your sock。〃



〃Signorino; domani faremo uno giro;〃 called the cabman; with

engaging certainty。



George told him that he was mistaken; they had no money to throw

away on driving。



And the people who had not meant to helpthe Miss Lavishes; the

Cecils; the Miss Bartletts! Ever prone to magnify Fate; George

counted up the forces that had swept him into this contentment。



〃Anything good in Freddy's letter?〃



〃Not yet。〃



His own content was absolute; but hers held bitterness: the

Honeychurches had not forgiven them; they were disgusted at her

past hypocrisy; she had alienated Windy Corner; perhaps for ever。



〃What does he say?〃



〃Silly boy! He thinks he's being dignified。 He knew we should go

off in the springhe has known it for six monthsthat if mother

wouldn't give her consent we should take the thing into our own

hands。 They had fair warni

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