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Enter Servant with candles�察�showing in MARLOW and HASTINGS。


SERVANT。  Welcome�察�gentlemen�察�very welcome�  �This way。

HASTINGS。  After the disappointments of the day�察�welcome once more�察�Charles�察�to the comforts of a clean room and a good fire。  Upon my word�察�a very well´looking house�察�antique but creditable。

MARLOW。  The usual fate of a large mansion。  Having first ruined the master by good housekeeping�察�it at last comes to levy contributions as an inn。

HASTINGS。  As you say�察�we passengers are to be taxed to pay all these fineries。  I have often seen a good sideboard�察�or a marble chimney´piece�察�though not actually put in the bill�察�inflame a reckoning confoundedly。

MARLOW。  Travellers�察�George�察�must pay in all places�此�the only difference is�察�that in good inns you pay dearly for luxuries�察�in bad inns you are fleeced and starved。

HASTINGS。  You have lived very much among them。  In truth�察�I have been often surprised�察�that you who have seen so much of the world�察�with your natural good sense�察�and your many opportunities�察�could never yet acquire a requisite share of assurance。

MARLOW。  The Englishman's malady。  But tell me�察�George�察�where could I have learned that assurance you talk of�拭 �My life has been chiefly spent in a college or an inn�察�in seclusion from that lovely part of the creation that chiefly teach men confidence。  I don't know that I was ever familiarly acquainted with a single modest womanexcept my motherBut among females of another class�察�you know

HASTINGS。  Ay�察�among them you are impudent enough of all conscience。

MARLOW。  They are of US�察�you know。

HASTINGS。  But in the company of women of reputation I never saw such an idiot�察�such a trembler�察�you look for all the world as if you wanted an opportunity of stealing out of the room。

MARLOW。  Why�察�man�察�that's because I do want to steal out of the room。  Faith�察�I have often formed a resolution to break the ice�察�and rattle away at any rate。  But I don't know how�察�a single glance from a pair of fine eyes has totally overset my resolution。  An impudent fellow may counterfeit modesty�察�but I'll be hanged if a modest man can ever counterfeit impudence。

HASTINGS。  If you could but say half the fine things to them that I have heard you lavish upon the bar´maid of an inn�察�or even a college bed´maker

MARLOW。  Why�察�George�察�I can't say fine things to them�察�they freeze�察�they petrify me。  They may talk of a comet�察�or a burning mountain�察�or some such bagatelle�察�but�察�to me�察�a modest woman�察�drest out in all her finery�察�is the most tremendous object of the whole creation。

HASTINGS。  Ha� �ha� �ha�  �At this rate�察�man�察�how can you ever expect to marry��

MARLOW。  Never�察�unless�察�as among kings and princes�察�my bride were to be courted by proxy。  If�察�indeed�察�like an Eastern bridegroom�察�one were to be introduced to a wife he never saw before�察�it might be endured。  But to go through all the terrors of a formal courtship�察�together with the episode of aunts�察�grandmothers�察�and cousins�察�and at last to blurt out the broad staring question of�察�Madam�察�will you marry me�拭 �No�察�no�察�that's a strain much above me�察�I assure you。

HASTINGS。  I pity you。  But how do you intend behaving to the lady you are come down to visit at the request of your father��

MARLOW。  As I behave to all other ladies。  Bow very low�察�answer yes or no to all her demandsBut for the rest�察�I don't think I shall venture to look in her face till I see my father's again。

HASTINGS。  I'm surprised that one who is so warm a friend can be so cool a lover。

MARLOW。  To be explicit�察�my dear Hastings�察�my chief inducement down was to be instrumental in forwarding your happiness�察�not my own。  Miss Neville loves you�察�the family don't know you�察�as my friend you are sure of a reception�察�and let honour do the rest。

HASTINGS。  My dear Marlow�  �But I'll suppress the emotion。  Were I a wretch�察�meanly seeking to carry off a fortune�察�you should be the last man in the world I would apply to for assistance。  But Miss Neville's person is all I ask�察�and that is mine�察�both from her deceased father's consent�察�and her own inclination。

MARLOW。  Happy man�  �You have talents and art to captivate any woman。  I'm doom'd to adore the sex�察�and yet to converse with the only part of it I despise。  This stammer in my address�察�and this awkward prepossessing visage of mine�察�can never permit me to soar above the reach of a milliner's 'prentice�察�or one of the duchesses of Drury´lane。  Pshaw� �this fellow here to interrupt us。


Enter HARDCASTLE。


HARDCASTLE。  Gentlemen�察�once more you are heartily welcome。  Which is Mr。 Marlow�拭 �Sir�察�you are heartily welcome。  It's not my way�察�you see�察�to receive my friends with my back to the fire。  I like give them a hearty reception in the old style at my gate。  I like to see their horses and trunks taken care of。

MARLOW。  ��Aside。��  He has got our names from the servants already。  ��To him。��  We approve your caution and hospitality�察�sir。  ��To HASTINGS。��  I have been thinking�察�George�察�of changing our travelling dresses in the morning。  I am grown confoundedly ashamed of mine。

HARDCASTLE。  I beg�察�Mr。 Marlow�察�you'll use no ceremony in this house。

HASTINGS。  I fancy�察�Charles�察�you're right�此�the first blow is half the battle。  I intend opening the campaign with the white and gold。

HARDCASTLE。  Mr。 MarlowMr。 Hastingsgentlemenpray be under no constraint in this house。  This is Liberty´hall�察�gentlemen。  You may do just as you please here。

MARLOW。  Yet�察�George�察�if we open the campaign too fiercely at first�察�we may want ammunition before it is over。  I think to reserve the embroidery to secure a retreat。

HARDCASTLE。  Your talking of a retreat�察�Mr。 Marlow�察�puts me in mind of the Duke of Marlborough�察�when we went to besiege Denain。  He first summoned the garrison

MARLOW。  Don't you think the ventre d'or waistcoat will do with the plain brown��

HARDCASTLE。  He first summoned the garrison�察�which might consist of about five thousand men

HASTINGS。  I think not�此�brown and yellow mix but very poorly。

HARDCASTLE。  I say�察�gentlemen�察�as I was telling you�察�be summoned the garrison�察�which might consist of about five thousand men

MARLOW。  The girls like finery。

HARDCASTLE。  Which might consist of about five thousand men�察�well appointed with stores�察�ammunition�察�and other implements of war。  Now�察�says the Duke of Marlborough to George Brooks�察�that stood next to himyou must have heard of George BrooksI'll pawn my dukedom�察�says he�察�but I take that garrison without spilling a drop of blood。  So

MARLOW。  What�察�my good friend�察�if you gave us a glass of punch in the mean time�察�it would help us to carry on the siege with vigour。

HARDCASTLE。  Punch�察�sir�  。�Aside。��  This is the most unaccountable kind of modesty I ever met with。

MARLOW。  Yes�察�sir�察�punch。  A glass of warm punch�察�after our journey�察�will be comfortable。  This is Liberty´hall�察�you know。

HARDCASTLE。  Here's a cup�察�sir。

MARLOW。  ��Aside。��  So this fellow�察�in his Liberty´hall�察�will only let us have just what he pleases。

HARDCASTLE。  ��Taking the cup。��  I hope you'll find it to your mind。  I have prepared it with my own hands�察�and I believe you'll own the ingredients are tolerable。  Will you be so good as to pledge me�察�sir�拭 �Here�察�Mr。 Marlow�察�here is to our better acquaintance。  ��Drinks。��

MARLOW。  ��Aside。��  A very impudent fellow this� �but he's a character�察�and I'll humour him a little。  Sir�察�my service to you。  ��Drinks。��

HASTINGS。  ��Aside。��  I see this fellow wants to give us his company�察�and forgets that he's an innkeeper�察�before he has learned to be a gentleman。

MARLOW。  From the excellence of your cup�察�my old friend�察�I suppose you have a good deal of business in this part of the country。  Warm work�察�now and then�察�at elections�察�I suppose。

HARDCASTLE。  No�察�sir�察�I have long given that work over。  Since our betters have hit upon the expedient of electing each other�察�there is no business ;for us that sell ale。;

HASTINGS。  So�察�then�察�you have no turn for politics�察�I find。

HARDCASTLE。  Not in the least。  There was a time�察�indeed�察�I fretted myself about the mistakes of government�察�like other people�察�but finding myself every day grow more angry�察�and the government growing no better�察�I left it to mend itself。  Since that�察�I no more trouble my head about Hyder Ally�察�or Ally Cawn�察�than about Ally Croker。  Sir�察�my service to you。

HASTINGS。  So that with eating above stairs�察�and drinking below�察�with receiving your friends within�察�and amusing them without�察�you lead a good pleasant bustling life of it。

HARDCASTLE。  I do stir about a great deal�察�that's certain。  Half the differences of the parish are adjusted in this very parlour。

MARLOW。  ��After drinking。��  And you have an argument in your cup�察�old gentleman�察�better than any in Westminster´hall。


HARDCASTLE。  Ay�察�young gentleman�察�that�察�and a little philosophy。

MARLOW。  ��Aside。��  Well�察�this is the first time I ever heard of an innkeeper's philosophy。

HASTINGS。  So then�察�like an experienced general�察�you attack them on every quarter。  If you find their reason manageable�察�you attack it with your philosophy�察�if you find they have no reason�察�you attack them with this。  Here's your health�察�my philosopher。  ��Drinks。��

HARDCASTLE。  Good�察�very good�察�thank y

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