two gentlemen of verona(维洛那两绅士)-第9节
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fool； look you； and yet I have the wit to think my master is a kind of a
knave； but that's all one if he be but one knave。 He lives not now that
knows me to be in love； yet I am in love； but a team of horse shall not
pluck that from me； nor who 'tis I love； and yet 'tis a woman； but what
woman I will not tell myself； and yet 'tis a milkmaid； yet 'tis not a maid；
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THE TWO GENTLEMEN OF VERONA
for she hath had gossips； yet 'tis a maid； for she is her master's maid and
serves for wages。 She hath more qualities than a water…spaniel… which is
much in a bare Christian。 Here is the
cate…log ＇Pulling out a paper＇ of her condition。 'Inprimis： She can
fetch and carry。' Why； a horse can do no more； nay； a horse cannot fetch；
but only carry； therefore is she better than a jade。 'Item： She can milk。'
Look you； a sweet virtue in a maid with clean hands。
Enter SPEED
SPEED。 How now； Signior Launce！ What news with your mastership？
LAUNCE。 With my master's ship？ Why； it is at sea。 SPEED。 Well； your
old vice still： mistake the word。 What news； then； in your paper？
LAUNCE。 The black'st news that ever thou heard'st。 SPEED。 Why； man？
how black？ LAUNCE。 Why； as black as ink。 SPEED。 Let me read them。
LAUNCE。 Fie on thee； jolt…head； thou canst not read。 SPEED。 Thou liest；
I can。 LAUNCE。 I will try thee。 Tell me this： Who begot thee？ SPEED。
Marry； the son of my grandfather。 LAUNCE。 O illiterate loiterer。 It was
the son of thy grandmother。 This proves that thou canst not read。 SPEED。
Come； fool； come； try me in thy paper。 LAUNCE。 ＇Handing over the
paper＇ There； and Saint Nicholas be thy speed。 SPEED。 ＇Reads＇ 'Inprimis：
She can milk。' LAUNCE。 Ay； that she can。 SPEED。 'Item： She brews good
ale。' LAUNCE。 And thereof comes the proverb： Blessing of your heart；
you brew good ale。 SPEED。 'Item： She can sew。' LAUNCE。 That's as
much as to say 'Can she so？' SPEED。 'Item： She can knit。' LAUNCE。 What
need a man care for a stock with a wench； when she can knit him a stock。
SPEED。 'Item： She can wash and scour。' LAUNCE。 A special virtue； for
then she need not be wash'd and scour'd。 SPEED。 'Item： She can spin。'
LAUNCE。 Then may I set the world on wheels； when she can spin for her
living。 SPEED。 'Item： She hath many nameless virtues。' LAUNCE。 That's
as much as to say 'bastard virtues'； that indeed know not their fathers； and
therefore have no names。 SPEED。 'Here follow her vices。' LAUNCE。
Close at the heels of her virtues。 SPEED。 'Item： She is not to be kiss'd
fasting； in respect of her breath。' LAUNCE。 Well； that fault may be
mended with a breakfast。 Read on。 SPEED。 'Item： She hath a sweet
mouth。' LAUNCE。 That makes amends for her sour breath。 SPEED。 'Item：
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THE TWO GENTLEMEN OF VERONA
She doth talk in her sleep。' LAUNCE。 It's no matter for that； so she sleep
not in her talk。 SPEED。 'Item： She is slow in words。' LAUNCE。 O villain；
that set this down among her vices！ To be slow in words is a woman's only
virtue。 I pray thee； out with't； and place it for her chief virtue。 SPEED。
'Item： She is proud。' LAUNCE。 Out with that too； it was Eve's legacy； and
cannot be ta'en from her。 SPEED。 'Item： She hath no teeth。' LAUNCE。 I
care not for that neither； because I love crusts。 SPEED。 'Item： She is curst。'
LAUNCE。 Well； the best is； she hath no teeth to bite。 SPEED。 'Item： She
will often praise her liquor。' LAUNCE。 If her liquor be good； she shall； if
she will not； I will； for good things should be praised。 SPEED。 'Item： She
is too liberal。' LAUNCE。 Of her tongue she cannot； for that's writ down
she is slow of； of her purse she shall not； for that I'll keep shut。 Now of
another thing she may； and that cannot I help。 Well； proceed。 SPEED。
'Item： She hath more hair than wit； and more faults than hairs； and more
wealth than faults。' LAUNCE。 Stop there； I'll have her； she was mine； and
not mine； twice or thrice in that last article。 Rehearse that once more。
SPEED。 'Item： She hath more hair than wit'… LAUNCE。 More hair than wit。
It may be； I'll prove it： the cover of the salt hides the salt； and therefore it
is more than the salt； the hair that covers the wit is more than the wit； for
the greater hides the less。 What's next？ SPEED。 'And more faults than
hairs'… LAUNCE。 That's monstrous。 O that that were out！ SPEED。 'And
more wealth than faults。' LAUNCE。 Why； that word makes the faults
gracious。 Well； I'll have her； an if it be a match； as nothing is impossible…
SPEED。 What then？ LAUNCE。 Why； then will I tell thee… that thy master
stays for thee at the Northgate。 SPEED。 For me？ LAUNCE。 For thee！ ay；
who art thou？ He hath stay'd for a better man than thee。 SPEED。 And must
I go to him？ LAUNCE。 Thou must run to him； for thou hast stay'd so long
that going will scarce serve the turn。 SPEED。 Why didst not tell me sooner？
Pox of your love letters！ Exit LAUNCE。 Now will he be swing'd for
reading my letter。 An unmannerly slave that will thrust himself into secrets！
I'll after； to rejoice in the boy's correction。 Exit
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THE TWO GENTLEMEN OF VERONA
SCENE II。 Milan。 The DUKE'S palace
Enter DUKE and THURIO
DUKE。 Sir Thurio； fear not but that she will love you Now Valentine
is banish'd from her sight。 THURIO。 Since his exile she hath despis'd me
most； Forsworn my company and rail'd at me； That I am desperate of
obtaining her。 DUKE。 This weak impress of love is as a figure Trenched in
ice； which with an hour's heat Dissolves to water and doth lose his form。 A
little time will melt her frozen thoughts； And worthless Valentine shall be
forgot。
Enter PROTEUS
How now； Sir Proteus！ Is your countryman； According to our
proclamation； gone？ PROTEUS。 Gone； my good lord。 DUKE。 My
daughter takes his going grievously。 PROTEUS。 A little time； my lord；
will kill that grief。 DUKE。 So I believe； but Thurio thinks not so。 Proteus；
the good conceit I hold of thee… For thou hast shown some sign of good
desert… Makes me the better to confer with thee。 PROTEUS。 Longer than I
prove loyal to your Grace Let me not live to look upon your Grace。 DUKE。
Thou know'st how willingly I would effect The match between Sir Thurio
and my daughter。 PROTEUS。 I do； my lord。 DUKE。 And also； I think；
thou art not ignorant How she opposes her against my will。 PROTEUS。
She did； my lord； when Valentine was here。 DUKE。 Ay； and perversely she
persevers so。 What might we do to make the girl forget The love of
Valentine； and love Sir Thurio？ PROTEUS。 The best way is to slander
Valentine With falsehood； cowardice； and poor descent… Three things that
women highly hold in hate。 DUKE。 Ay； but she'll think that it is spoke in
hate。 PROTEUS。 Ay； if his enemy deliver it； Therefore it must with
circumstance be spoken By one whom she esteemeth as his friend。 DUKE。
Then you must undertake to slander him。 PROTEUS。 And that； my lord； I
shall be loath to do： 'Tis an ill office for a gentleman； Especially against
his very friend。 DUKE。 Where your good word cannot advantage him；
Your slander never can endamage him； Therefore the office is indifferent；
Being entreated to it by your friend。 PROTEUS。 You have prevail'd； my
lord； if I can do it By aught that I can speak in his dispraise； She shall not
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THE TWO GENTLEMEN OF VERONA
long continue love to him。 But say this weed her love from Valentine； It
follows not that she will love Sir Thurio。 THURIO。 Therefore； as you
unwind her love from him； Lest it should ravel and be good to none； You
must provide to bottom it on me； Which must be done by praising me as
much As you in worth dispraise Sir Valentine。 DUKE。 And； Proteus； we
dare trust you in this kind； Because we know； on Valentine's report； You
are already Love's firm votary And cannot soon revolt and change your
mind。 Upon this wa
