crime and punishment(罪与罚)-第37节
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raised him up and gave him tea in spoonfuls； again blowing each
spoonful steadily and earnestly； as though this process was the
principal and most effective means towards his friend's recovery。
Raskolnikov said nothing and made no resistance； though he felt
quite strong enough to sit up on the sofa without support and could
not merely have held a cup or a spoon； but even perhaps could have
walked about。 But from some queer； almost animal； cunning he conceived
the idea of hiding his strength and lying low for a time； pretending
if necessary not to be yet in full possession of his faculties； and
meanwhile listening to find out what was going on。 Yet he could not
overcome his sense of repugnance。 After sipping a dozen spoonfuls of
tea； he suddenly released his head； pushed the spoon away
capriciously； and sank back on the pillow。 There were actually real
pillows under his head now； down pillows in clean cases； he observed
that； too； and took note of it。
〃Pashenka must give us some raspberry jam to…day to make him some
raspberry tea；〃 said Razumihin； going back to his chair and
attacking his soup and beer again。
〃And where is she to get raspberries for you？〃 asked Nastasya；
balancing a saucer on her five outspread fingers and sipping tea
through a lump of sugar。
〃She'll get it at the shop； my dear。 You see； Rodya； all sorts of
things have been happening while you have been laid up。 When you
decamped in that rascally way without leaving your address； I felt
so angry that I resolved to find you out and punish you。 I set to work
that very day。 How I ran about making inquiries for you！ This
lodging of yours I had forgotten； though I never remembered it；
indeed； because I did not know it； and as for your old lodgings； I
could only remember it was at the Five Corners； Harlamov's house。 I
kept trying to find that Harlamov's house； and afterwards it turned
out that it was not Harlamov's； but Buch's。 How one muddles up sound
sometimes！ So I lost my temper； and I went on the chance to the
address bureau next day； and only fancy； in two minutes they looked
you up！ Your name is down there。〃
〃My name！〃
〃I should think so； and yet a General Kobelev they could not find
while I was there。 Well； it's a long story。 But as soon as I did
land on this place； I soon got to know all your affairs… all； all；
brother； I know everything； Nastasya here will tell you。 I made the
acquaintance of Nikodim Fomitch and Ilya Petrovitch； and the
house…porter and Mr。 Zametov； Alexandr Grigorievitch； the head clerk
in the police office； and； last； but not least； of Pashenka；
Nastasya here knows。。。。〃
〃He's got round her；〃 Nastasya murmured； smiling slyly。
〃Why don't you put the sugar in your tea； Nastasya Nikiforovna？〃
〃You are a one！〃 Nastasya cried suddenly； going off into a giggle。
〃I am not Nikiforovna； but Petrovna；〃 she added suddenly； recovering
from her mirth。
〃I'll make a note of it。 Well； brother； to make a long story
short； I was going in for a regular explosion here to uproot all
malignant influences in the locality； but Pashenka won the day。 I
had not expected； brother； to find her so。。。 prepossessing。 Eh； what
do you think？〃
Raskolnikov did not speak； but he still kept his eyes fixed upon
him； full of alarm。
〃And all that could be wished； indeed； in every respect；〃
Razumihin went on； not at all embarrassed by his silence。
〃Ah； the sly dog！〃 Nastasya shrieked again。 This conversation
afforded her unspeakable delight。
〃It's a pity； brother； that you did not set to work in the right way
at first。 You ought to have approached her differently。 She is； so
to speak； a most unaccountable character。 But we will talk about her
character later。。。。 How could you let things come to such a pass
that she gave up sending you your dinner？ And that I。O。U。？ You must
have been mad to sign an I。O。U。 And that promise of marriage when
her daughter； Natalya Yegorovna； was alive？。。。 I know all about it！
But I see that's a delicate matter and I am an ass； forgive me。 But；
talking of foolishness； do you know Praskovya Pavlovna is not nearly
so foolish as you would think at first sight？〃
〃No；〃 mumbled Raskolnikov； looking away； but feeling that it was
better to keep up the conversation。
〃She isn't； is she？〃 cried Razumihin； delighted to get an answer out
of him。 〃But she is not very clever either； eh？ She is essentially；
essentially an unaccountable character！ I am sometimes quite at a
loss； I assure you。。。。 She must be forty； she says she is
thirty…six； and of course she has every right to say so。 But I swear I
judge her intellectually； simply from the metaphysical point of
view； there is a sort of symbolism sprung up between us； a sort of
algebra or what not！ I don't understand it！ Well； that's all nonsense。
Only； seeing that you are not a student now and have lost your lessons
and your clothes； and that through the young lady's death she has no
need to treat you as a relation； she suddenly took fright； and as
you hid in your den and dropped all your old relations with her； she
planned to get rid of you。 And she's been cherishing that design a
long time； but was sorry to lose the I。O。U。 for you assured her
yourself that your mother would pay。〃
〃It was base of me to say that。。。。 My mother herself is almost a
beggar。。。 and I told a lie to keep my lodging。。。 and be fed；〃
Raskolnikov said loudly and distinctly。
〃Yes； you did very sensibly。 But the worst of it is that at that
point Mr。 Tchebarov turns up； a business man。 Pashenka would never
have thought of doing anything on her own account； she is too
retiring； but the business man is by no means retiring； and first
thing he puts the question； 'Is there any hope of realising the
I。O。U。？' Answer： there is； because he has a mother who would save
her Rodya with her hundred and twenty…five roubles pension； if she has
to starve herself； and a sister； too； who would go into bondage for
his sake。 That's what he was building upon。。。。 Why do you start？ I
know all the ins and outs of your affairs now； my dear boy… it's not
for nothing that you were so open with Pashenka when you were her
prospective son…in…law； and I say all this as a friend。。。。 But I
tell you what it is； an honest and sensitive man is open； and a
business man 'listens and goes on eating' you up。 Well； then she
gave the I。O。U。 by way of payment to this Tchebarov； and without
hesitation he made a formal demand for payment。 When I heard of all
this I wanted to blow him up； too； to clear my conscience； but by that
time harmony reigned between me and Pashenka； and I insisted on
stopping the whole affair； engaging that you would pay。 I went
security for you； brother。 Do you understand？ We called Tchebarov；
flung him ten roubles and got the I。O。U。 back from him； and here I
have the honour of presenting it to you。 She trusts your word now。
Here； take it； you see I have torn it。〃
Razumihin put the note on the table。 Raskolnikov looked at him and
turned to the wall without uttering a word。 Even Razumihin felt a
twinge。
〃I see； brother；〃 he said a moment later； 〃that I have been
playing the fool again。 I thought I should amuse you with my
chatter； and I believe I have only made you cross。〃
〃Was it you I did not recognise when I was delirious？〃 Raskolnikov
asked； after a moment's pause with
