crime and punishment(罪与罚)-第116节
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it； a question occurred to me at once； just when I was thanking you
and pressing your hand。 What made you put it secretly in her pocket？
Why you did it secretly； I mean？ Could it be simply to conceal it from
me； knowing that my convictions are opposed to yours and that I do not
approve of private benevolence； which effects no radical cure？ Well； I
decided that you really were ashamed of giving such a large sum before
me。 Perhaps； too； I thought； he wants to give her a surprise； when she
finds a whole hundred…rouble note in her pocket。 （For I know some
benevolent people are very fond of decking out their charitable
actions in that way。） Then the idea struck me； too； that you wanted to
test her； to see whether； when she found it； she would come to thank
you。 Then； too； that you wanted to avoid thanks and that； as the
saying is； your right hand should not know。。。 something of that
sort； in fact。 I thought of so many possibilities that I put off
considering it； but still thought it indelicate to show you I knew
your secret。 But another idea struck me again that Sofya Semyonovna
might easily lose the money before she noticed it； that was why I
decided to come in here to call her out of the room and to tell her
that you put a hundred roubles in her pocket。 But on my way I went
first to Madame Kobilatnikov's to take them the 'General Treatise on
the Positive Method' and especially to recommend Piderit's article
（and also Wagner's）； then I come on here and what a state of things
I find！ Now could I； could I； have all these ideas and reflections； if
I had not seen you put the hundred…rouble note in her pocket？〃
When Lebeziatnikov finished his long…winded harangue with the
logical deduction at the end； he was quite tired； and the perspiration
streamed from his face。 He could not； alas； even express himself
correctly in Russian； though he knew no other language； so that he was
quite exhausted； almost emaciated after this heroic exploit。 But his
speech produced a powerful effect。 He had spoken with such
vehemence； with such conviction that every one obviously believed him。
Pyotr Petrovitch felt that things were going badly with him。
〃What is it to do with me if silly ideas did occur to you？〃 he
shouted； 〃that's no evidence。 You may have dreamt it； that's all！
And I tell you； you are lying； sir。 You are lying and slandering
from some spite against me； simply from pique； because I did not agree
with your freethinking； godless； social propositions！〃
But this retort did not benefit Pyotr Petrovitch。 Murmurs of
disapproval were heard on all sides。
〃Ah； that's your line now； is it！〃 cried Lebeziatnikov； 〃that's
nonsense！ Call the police and I'll take my oath！ There's only one
thing I can't understand： what made him risk such a contemptible
action。 Oh； pitiful； despicable man！〃
〃I can explain why he risked such an action； and if necessary； I；
too； will swear to it；〃 Raskolnikov said at last in a firm voice；
and he stepped forward。
He appeared to be firm and composed。 Every one felt clearly； from
the very look of him that he really knew about it and that the mystery
would be solved。
〃Now I can explain it all to myself；〃 said Raskolnikov； addressing
Lebeziatnikov。 〃From the very beginning of the business； I suspected
that there was some scoundrelly intrigue at the bottom of it。 I
began to suspect it from some special circumstances known to me
only； which I will explain at once to every one： they account for
everything。 Your valuable evidence has finally made everything clear
to me。 I beg all； all to listen。 This gentleman （he pointed to Luzhin）
was recently engaged to be married to a young lady… my sister； Avdotya
Romanovna Raskolnikov。 But coming to Petersburg he quarrelled with me；
the day before yesterday； at our first meeting and I drove him out
of my room… I have two witnesses to prove it。 He is a very spiteful
man。。。。 The day before yesterday I did not know that he was staying
here； in your room； and that consequently on the very day we
quarrelled… the day before yesterday… he saw me give Katerina Ivanovna
some money for the funeral； as a friend of the late Mr。 Marmeladov。 He
at once wrote a note to my mother and informed her that I had given
away all my money； not to Katerina Ivanovna； but to Sofya
Semyonovna； and referred in a most contemptible way to the。。。
character of Sofya Semyonovna； that is； hinted at the character of
my attitude to Sofya Semyonovna。 All this you understand was with
the object of dividing me from my mother and sister； by insinuating
that I was squandering on unworthy objects the money which they had
sent me and which was all they had。 Yesterday evening； before my
mother and sister and in his presence； I declared that I had given the
money to Katerina Ivanovna for the funeral and not to Sofya Semyonovna
and that I had no acquaintance with Sofya Semyonovna and had never
seen her before； indeed。 At the same time I added that he； Pyotr
Petrovitch Luzhin； with all his virtues was not worth Sofya
Semyonovna's little finger； though he spoke so ill of her。 To his
question… would I let Sofya Semyonovna sit down beside my sister； I
answered that I had already done so that day。 Irritated that my mother
and sister were unwilling to quarrel with me at his insinuations； he
gradually began being unpardonably rude to them。 A final rupture
took place and he was turned out of the house。 All this happened
yesterday evening。 Now I beg your special attention： consider： if he
had now succeeded in proving that Sofya Semyonovna was a thief； he
would have shown to my mother and sister that he was almost right in
his suspicions； that he had reason to be angry at my putting my sister
on a level with Sofya Semyonovna； that； in attacking me； he was
protecting and preserving the honour of my sister； his betrothed。 In
fact he might even； through all this； have been able to estrange me
from my family； and no doubt he hoped to be restored to favour with
them； to say nothing of revenging himself on me personally； for he has
grounds for supposing that the honour and happiness of Sofya
Semyonovna are very precious to me。 That was what he was working
for！ That's how I understand it。 That's the whole reason for it and
there can be no other！〃
It was like this； or somewhat like this； that Raskolnikov wound up
his speech which was followed very attentively； though often
interrupted by exclamations from his audience。 But in spite of
interruptions he spoke clearly； calmly； exactly； firmly。 His
decisive voice； his tone of conviction and his stern face made a great
impression on every one。
〃Yes； yes； that's it；〃 Lebeziatnikov assented gleefully； 〃that
must be it； for he asked me； as soon as Sofya Semyonovna came into our
room； whether you were here； whether I had seen you among Katerina
Ivanovna's guests。 He called me aside to the window and asked me in
secret。 It was essential for him that you should be here！ That's it；
that's it！〃
Luzhin smiled contemptuously and did not speak。 But he was very
pale。 He seemed to be deliberating on some means of escape。 Perhaps he
would have been glad to give up everything and get away； but at the
moment this was scarcely possible。 It would have implied admitting the
truth of the accusations brought against him。 Moreover； the company；
which had already been excited by drink； was now too much stirred to
allow it。 The commissariat clerk； though indeed he had not grasped the
whole position； was shouting louder than any one and was making some
suggestions very unpleasant to Luzhin。 But not all those present
were drunk； lodgers came in from all the rooms。 The three Poles were
tremendously excited and were continually shouting at him： 〃The Pan is
a lajdak！〃 and muttering threats i
