cb.coldheart canyon-第57节

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　 〃No。　That　room　is　mine。　All　of　it。　Every　damn　tile。〃
　 The　quiet　ferocity　with　which　she　spoke　silenced　him。　He　just　stared　at　her　for　perhaps　a　minute；　while　she　lit　a　cigarette；　her　fingers　trembling。　Finally；　he　summoned　up　enough　courage　to　say：　〃You　are　afraid。〃
　 She　stared　out　of　the　window；　almost　as　though　she　hadn't　heard　him。　When　she　spoke　again　her　voice　was　as　soft　as　it　had　been　strident　a　minute　ago。
　 〃I'm　not　afraid　of　the　dead；　Willem。　But　I　am　afraid　of　what　will　happen　to　me　if　I　lose　the　room。〃　She　looked　at　the　palm　of　her　hand；　as　though　she　might　find　her　future　written　there。　But　it　wasn't　the　lines　of　her　hand　she　was　admiring；　it　was　its　smoothness。　〃Being　in　the　Devil's　Country　has　made　me　feel　younger；　Willem。　It　did　that　to　everybody。　Younger。　Sexier。　But　as　soon　as　it's　taken　away。。。〃
　 〃。。。yes。　You'll　get　sick。〃
　 〃I'm　never　going　to　get　sick。〃　She　allowed　herself　the　time　for　a　smile。　〃Perhaps　I'm　never　going　to　die。〃
　 〃Don't　be　foolish。〃
　 〃I　mean　it。〃
　 〃So　do　I。　Don't　be　foolish。　Whatever　you　think　the　room　can　do；　it　won't　make　you　immortal。〃
　 The　wisp　of　a　smile　remained　on　her　face。　〃Wouldn't　you　like　that；　Willem？〃
　 〃No。〃
　 〃Just　a　little　bit？〃
　 〃I　said　no；〃　he　shook　his　head；　his　voice　dropping。　〃Not　any　more。〃
　 〃Meaning　what？〃
　 〃What　do　you　think　I　mean？　This　life　of　ours。。。isn't　worth　living。〃
　 There　was　a　silence　between　them。　It　lasted　two；　three；　four　minutes。　Rain　began　to　hit　the　window；　fat　spots　of　it　bursting　against　the　glass。
　 〃I'll　find　Sandru　for　you；〃　Willem　said　finally。　〃Or　if　not　him；　somebody　who　knows　how　to　deal　with　these　things。　I'll　find　a　solution。〃
　 〃Do　that；〃　she　said。　〃And　if　you　can't；　don't　bother　to　e　back。〃
　
　
　PART　SIX
　THE　DEVIL'S　COUNTRY
　
　ONE
　 Todd　knew　the　mechanics　of　illusion　passably　well。　He'd　always　enjoyed　watching　the　special　effects　guys　at　work；　or　the　stuntmen　with　their　rigs；　and　now　there　was　a　new　generation　of　illusionists　who　worked　with　tools　that　the　old　matte　painters　and　model…makers　of　an　earlier　time　could　not　even　have　imagined。　He'd　been　in　a　couple　of　pictures　in　which　he'd　played　entire　scenes　against　blank　green　screens；　which　were　later　replaced　with　landscapes　which　only　existed　in　the　ticking　minds　of　puters。
　 But　the　illusions　at　work　in　this　room　of　Katya's　were　of　another　order　entirely。　There　was　a　force　at　work　here　that　was　both　incredibly　powerful　and　old；　even　venerable。　It　did　not　require　electricity　to　fuel　it；　nor　equations　to　encode　it。　The　walls　held　it；　with　possessive　caution；　beguiling　him　by　increments。
　 At　first　he　could　make　virtually　no　sense　of　the　images。　It　simply　seemed　that　the　walls　were　heavily　stained。　Then；　as　his　eyes　became　accustomed　to　reading　the　surface；　he　realized　he　was　looking　at　tiles；　and　that　what　he'd　taken　to　be　stains　were　in　fact　pictures；　painted　and　baked　into　the　ceramic。　He　was　standing　in　a　representation　of　an　immense　landscape；　which　looked　more　realistic　the　longer　he　looked　at　it。　There　were　vast　expanses　of　dense　forests；　there　were　stretches　of　sun…drenched　rock；　there　were　steep　cliff…walls；　their　crannies　nested　by　fearless　birds；　there　were　rivulets　that　became　streams；　in　turn　converging　into　glittering　rivers；　which　wound　their　way　towards　the　horizon；　dividing　into　silver…fringed　deltas　before　they　finally　found　the　sea。　Such　was　the　elaboration　of　the　painting　that　it　would　take　many　hours　of　study；　perhaps　even　days；　to　hope　to　discover　everything　that　the　painters　had　rendered。　And　that　would　only　have　been　the　case　if　the　pictures　had　been　static；　which；　as　he　was　now　astonished　to　see；　was　not　the　case。
　 There　were　little　flickers　of　motion　all　around　him。　A　gust　of　wind　shook　the　tangle　of　a　thicket；　one　of　those　fearless　birds　wheeled　away　from　the　cliff…face；　three　hunting　dogs　sniffed　their　way　through　the　undergrowth；　noses　to　the　ground。　〃Katya。。。？〃　Todd　said。
　 There　was　no　reply　from　behind　him　（where　he　thought　she'd　last　been　standing）；　so　he　looked　back。　She　wasn't　there。　Nor　was　the　door　through　which　he'd　stepped　to　e　into　this　new　world。　There　was　just　more　landscape：　more　trees；　more　rocks；　more　birds；　wheeling。
　 The　motion　multiplied　with　every　flicker　of　his　gaze。　There　were　ripples　on　the　rivulets　and　streams；　there　were　clouds　over　the　sea；　being　hurried　along　by　the　same　wind　that　filled　the　sails　of　the　ships　that　moved　below。　There　were　men；　too；　all　around。　Riders；　moving　through　the　forest；　some　solitary；　some　in　groups　of　three　or　four；　one　procession　of　five　horses　mounted　by　richly　attired　men；　parading　solemnly　between　the　trees。　And　fishermen　on　the　banks　of　the　streams；　and　on　little　boats；　bobbing　around　the　sandbars　at　the　delta；　and　in　one　place；　inexplicably；　two　men　laid　out　naked　on　a　rock；　and　in　another；　far　more　explicable；　another　pair　hanging　from　a　tree；　while　their　lynchers　sat　in　the　shade　of　the　old　tree　they'd　put　to　such　guilty　use；　and　looked　out　at　the　rest　of　the　world　as　they　shared　a　flagon　of　beer。
　 Again　he　looked　around　for　Katya；　but　she　wasn't　to　be　seen。　But　she'd　said　she'd　be　close　by；　even　if…as　now…he　couldn't　see　her。　The　room；　he　began　to　understand；　had　control　of　his　eyes。　He　found　his　gaze　repeatedly　led　away　from　where　she　might　be；　led　skyward；　to　gawk　at　some　passing　birds　（there　were　tiles　on　the　vaulted　roof；　he　saw；　he　could　hear　the　squeak　of　the　bird's　wings　as　they　passed　overhead）；　led　into　the　forest；　where　animals　he　could　not　name　moved　as　if　in　some　secret　ceremony；　and　others　fought；　and　others　lay　dead；　and　still　others　were　being　born。　（Though　like　did　not　spring　from　like　in　this　world。　In　one　spot　an　animal　the　size　and　shape　of　a　tiger　was　giving　birth　to　half　a　dozen　white　lizards；　in　another　a　hen　the　size　of　a　horse　was　retreating　from　her　eggs　in　panic；　seeing　that　they'd　cracked　open　and　were　spilling　huge　blue　flies。）
　 And　still　he　kept　looking。　And　still　he　kept　seeing；　and　though　there　were　horrors　here；　to　be　sure；　nothing　in　him　made　him　want　to　leave　off　his　seeing。
　 There　was　a　curious　calm　upon　his　soul；　a　kind　of　dreamy　indifference　to　his　own　situation。　If　he'd　reasoned　this　out　perhaps　he　would　have　concluded　that　he　wasn't　afraid　because　none　of　this　could　possibly　be　real。　But　he　did　not　reason　it　out。　He　was　beyond　reasoning　at　that　moment。　Beyond　anything；　indeed；　but　witnessing。　He　had　bee　a　living　instrument；　a　flesh…and…blood　camera；　recording　this　wonderland。　He　kept　turning　on　his　heel；　counter…clockwise；　as　sights　caught　his　attention　off　to　his　left；　and　left　again；　and　left　again。
　 Everything　here　had　a　miraculous　shine　to　it；　as　though　whatever　divinity　had　made　it　had　an　army　of　workers　at　His　or　Her　mand；　perpetually　polishing　the　world。　Every　leaf　on　every　tree　had　its　gloss；　every　hair　on　every　mammal　and　every　scale　on　every　reptile　had　its　sheen；　every　particle　of　dirt；　down　to　the　shit　from　the　flea…infested　backside　of　a　boar；　had　a　glamour　all　of　its　own。　A　rat　sniffing　in　the　carcass　of　a　gored　hound　came　away　with　drops　of　corruption　on　its　whiskers　as　enchanting　as　a　lover's　eyes。　The　earth　at　his　feet　（yes；　there　were　tiles　there　too；　painted　with　as　much　love　as　forest　or　cloud）　was　a　surfeit　of　glories：　a　worm　his　heel　had　half…killed　was　lovely　in　its　knotted　agonies。
　 Nothing　was　inconsequential　here。　Except　perhaps；　Todd　Pickett。　And　if　that　was　the　case；　then　he　wasn't　about　to　dispute　the　point。　He　would　not　wish　anything　here　other　than　the　way　it　was；　including…for　the　first　time　in　his　life…himself。
　 This　thought…that　he　was　finally　at　peace　with　himself…came　over　him　like　a　breaking　wave；　cooling　a　long　and　exhausting　fever。　If　he　was　nothing　here；　he　thought；　except　the　eyes　with　which/these　strangenesses　could　be　glorified；　then　that　suited　him　fine。　And　if　in　the　end　the　witnessing　burned　him　up；　and　made　an　end　to　him；　that　was　fine　too；　perfectly　fine；　to　die　here；　watching　this　shining　world。　It　would　hear　no　plaint　from　him。
　 〃You　like　it？〃
　 Ah；　there　was　Katya。　Off　to　his　right；　a　little　distance；　staring　up　at　the　glamorous　sky。
　 He　followed　her　gaze；　and　saw　something　he'd　missed　until　now：　the　sun　was　three…quarters　eclipsed　by　the　moon。　That　was　why　the　light　was　so　peculiar　here；　it　was　the　light　of　a　world　in　permanent　semi…darkness；　a　murk　which　had　inspired　everything　that　lived　here　to　catch　its　own　particular　fire。　To　snatch　every　last　gleam　of　light　out　of　the　air　and　magnify　it；　to　be　its　own　exquisite　advertisement。
　 〃Yes；〃　he　said　to　her；　hearing　something　very　close　to　tears　in　his　voice。　〃I　like　it　very　much。〃
　 〃Not　everybody　does；　of　course；〃　she　said；　glancing　over　at　him。　〃Some　I　brought　here　were　so　afraid　that　they　ran。　And　of　course；　that's　not　a　very　smart　thing　to　do　here。〃
　 〃Why　not？〃
　 She　wandered　over　to　him；　assessing　him　as　she　did　so；　as　though　to　see　if　he　was　telling　the　truth；　and　that　he　really　liked　what　he　saw。　Apparently　satisfied；　she　laid　a　light　kiss　on　his　cheek：　it　almost　felt　as　though　she　was　congratulating　him。　ing　here　had　been　a　test；　he　realized；　and　he'd　passed。
　 〃You　see　over　there；　just　beyond　the　hill？　The　deep　forest　there？〃
　 〃Yes。〃
　 〃Then　you　al