tales from two hemispheres[1].(两个半球的故事)-第23节
按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
a Strauss waltz； 〃then it is no use struggling against fate。 Come； let us
make the plunge together。 Misery loves company。〃
He offered her his arm； and she arose； somewhat hesitatingly； and
followed。
〃I am afraid；〃 she whispered； as they fell into line with the procession
that was moving down the long hall； 〃that you have asked me to dance
merely because I said I felt forlorn。 If that is the case； I should prefer to
be led back to my seat。〃
〃What a base imputation！〃 cried Ralph。
There was something so charmingly naive in this self…
depreciationsomething so altogether novel in his experience； and； he
could not help adding； just a little bit countrified。 His spirits rose； he
began to relish keenly his position as an experienced man of the world；
and； in the agreeable glow of patronage and conscious superiority； chatted
with hearty ABANDON with his little rustic beauty。
〃If your dancing is as perfect as your German exercises were；〃 said she；
laughing； as they swung out upon the floor； 〃then I promise myself a good
deal of pleasure from our meeting。〃
〃Never fear；〃 answered he； quickly reversing his step； and whirling
with many a capricious turn away among the thronging couples。
When Ralph drove home in his carriage toward morning he briefly
summed up his impressions of Bertha in the following adjectives：
intelligent； delightfully unsophisticated； a little bit verdant； but devilish
pretty。
Some weeks later Colonel Grim received an appointment at the
73
… Page 74…
TALES FROM TWO HEMISPHERES。
fortress of Aggershuus； and immediately took up his residence in the
capital。 He saw that his son cut a fine figure in the highest circles of
society； and expressed his gratification in the most emphatic terms。 If he
had known； however； that Ralph was in the habit of visiting； with alarming
regularity； at the house of a plebeian merchant in a somewhat obscure
street； he would； no doubt； have been more chary of his praise。 But the
Colonel suspected nothing； and it was well for the peace of the family that
he did not。 It may have been cowardice in Ralph that he never
mentioned Bertha's name to his family or to his aristocratic acquaintances；
for； to be candid； he himself felt ashamed of the power she exerted over
him； and by turns pitied and ridiculed himself for pursuing so inglorious a
conquest。 Nevertheless it wounded his egotism that she never showed
any surprise at seeing him； that she received him with a certain frank
unceremoniousness； which； however； was very becoming to her； that she
invariably went on with her work heedless of his presence； and in
everything treated him as if she had been his equal。 She persisted in
talking with him in a half sisterly fashion about his studies and his future
career； warned him with great solicitude against some of his reprobate
friends； of whose merry adventures he had told her； and if he ventured to
compliment her on her beauty or her accomplishments； she would look up
gravely from her sewing； or answer him in a way which seemed to banish
the idea of love…making into the land of the impossible。 He was
constantly tormented by the suspicion that she secretly disapproved of him；
and that from a mere moral interest in his welfare she was conscientiously
laboring to make him a better man。 Day after day he parted from her
feeling humiliated； faint…hearted； and secretly indignant both at himself
and her； and day after day he returned only to renew the same experience。
At last it became too intolerable； he could endure it no longer。 Let it
make or break； certainty； at all risks； was at least preferable to this
sickening suspense。 That he loved her； he could no longer doubt； let his
parents foam and fret as much as they pleased； for once he was going to
stand on his own legs。 And in the end； he thought； they would have to
yield； for they had no son but him。
Bertha was going to return to her home on the sea…coast in a week。
74
… Page 75…
TALES FROM TWO HEMISPHERES。
Ralph stood in the little low…ceiled parlor； as she imagined； to bid her
good…bye。 They had been speaking of her father； her brothers； and the
farm； and she had expressed the wish that if he ever should come to that
part of the country he might pay them a visit。 Her words had kindled a
vague hope in his breast； but in their very frankness and friendly regard
there was something which slew the hope they had begotten。 He held her
hand in his； and her large confiding eyes shone with an emotion which
was beautiful； but was yet not love。
〃If you were but a peasant born like myself；〃 said she； in a voice which
sounded almost tender； 〃then I should like to talk to you as I would to my
own brother； but〃
〃No； not brother； Bertha；〃 cried he； with sudden vehemence； 〃I love
you better than I ever loved any earthly being； and if you knew how firmly
this love has clutched at the roots of my heart； you would perhapsyou
would at least not look so reproachfully at me。〃
She dropped his hand； and stood for a moment silent。
〃I am sorry that it should have come to this； Mr。 Grim；〃 said she；
visibly struggling for calmness。 〃And I am perhaps more to blame than
you。〃
〃Blame；〃 muttered he； 〃why are you to blame？〃
〃Because I do not love you； although I sometimes feared that this
might come。 But then again I persuaded myself that it could not be so。〃
He took a step toward the door； laid his hand on the knob； and gazed
down before him。
〃Bertha；〃 began he； slowly； raising his head； 〃you have always
disapproved of me； you have despised me in your heart； but you thought
you would be doing a good work if you succeeded in making a man of
me。〃
〃You use strong language；〃 answered she； hesitatingly； 〃but there is
truth in what you say。〃
Again there was a long pause； in which the ticking of the old parlor
clock grew louder and louder。
〃Then；〃 he broke out at last； 〃tell me before we part if I can do nothing
to gainI will not say your lovebut only your regard？ What would you
75
… Page 76…
TALES FROM TWO HEMISPHERES。
do if you were in my place？〃
〃My advice you will hardly heed； and I do not even know that it would
be well if you did。 But if I were a man in your position； I should break
with my whole past； start out into the world where nobody knew me； and
where I should be dependent only upon my own strength； and there I
would conquer a place for myself； if it were only for the satisfaction of
knowing that I was really a man。 Here cushions are sewed under your
arms； a hundred invisible threads bind you to a life of idleness and vanity；
everybody is ready to carry you on his hands； the road is smoothed for you；
every stone carefully moved out of your path； and you will probably go to
your grave without having ever harbored one earnest thought； without
having done one manly deed。〃
Ralph stood transfixed； gazing at her with open mouth； he felt a kind
of stupid fright； as if some one had suddenly seized him by the shoulders
and shaken him violently。 He tried vainly to remove his eyes from
Bertha。 She held him as by a powerful spell。 He saw that her face was
lighted with an altogether new beauty； he noticed the deep glow upon her
cheek； the brilliancy of her eye； the slight quiver of her lip。 But he saw
all this as one sees things in a half…trance； without attempting to account
for them； the door between his soul and his senses was closed。
