zanoni-第66节

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sensual；　and　a　brief　experiment　of　thy　patience　and　thy　faith。

Go　back　to　thine　own　world；　thou　hast　no　nature　to　aspire　to

ours！



〃It　was　I　who　prepared　Paolo　to　receive　thee　at　the　revel。　　It

was　I　who　instigated　the　old　beggar　to　ask　thee　for　alms。　　It　was

I　who　left　open　the　book　that　thou　couldst　not　read　without

violating　my　command。　　Well；　thou　hast　seen　what　awaits　thee　at

the　threshold　of　knowledge。　　Thou　hast　confronted　the　first　foe

that　menaces　him　whom　the　senses　yet　grasp　and　inthrall。　　Dost

thou　wonder　that　I　close　upon　thee　the　gates　forever？　　Dost　thou

not　comprehend；　at　last；　that　it　needs　a　soul　tempered　and

purified　and　raised；　not　by　external　spells；　but　by　its　own

sublimity　and　valour；　to　pass　the　threshold　and　disdain　the　foe？

Wretch！　all　my　silence　avails　nothing　for　the　rash；　for　the

sensual；for　him　who　desires　our　secrets　but　to　pollute　them　to

gross　enjoyments　and　selfish　vice。　　How　have　the　imposters　and

sorcerers　of　the　earlier　times　perished　by　their　very　attempt　to

penetrate　the　mysteries　that　should　purify；　and　not　deprave！

They　have　boasted　of　the　Philosopher's　Stone；　and　died　in　rags；

of　the　immortal　elixir；　and　sunk　to　their　grave；　grey　before

their　time。　　Legends　tell　you　that　the　fiend　rent　them　into

fragments。　　Yes；　the　fiend　of　their　own　unholy　desires　and

criminal　designs！　　What　they　coveted；　thou　covetest；　and　if　thou

hadst　the　wings　of　a　seraph　thou　couldst　soar　not　from　the　slough

of　thy　mortality。　　Thy　desire　for　knowledge；　but　petulant

presumption；　thy　thirst　for　happiness；　but　the　diseased　longing

for　the　unclean　and　muddied　waters　of　corporeal　pleasure；　thy

very　love；　which　usually　elevates　even　the　mean；　a　passion　that

calculates　treason　amidst　the　first　glow　of　lust。　　THOU　one　of

us；　thou　a　brother　of　the　August　Order；　thou　an　Aspirant　to　the

Stars　that　shine　in　the　Shemaia　of　the　Chaldean　lore！　　The　eagle

can　raise　but　the　eaglet　to　the　sun。　　I　abandon　thee　to　thy

twilight！



〃But；　alas　for　thee；　disobedient　and　profane！　thou　hast　inhaled

the　elixir；　thou　hast　attracted　to　thy　presence　a　ghastly　and

remorseless　foe。　　Thou　thyself　must　exorcise　the　phantom　thou

hast　raised。　　Thou　must　return　to　the　world；　but　not　without

punishment　and　strong　effort　canst　thou　regain　the　calm　and　the

joy　of　the　life　thou　hast　left　behind。　　This；　for　thy　comfort；

will　I　tell　thee：　　he　who　has　drawn　into　his　frame　even　so　little

of　the　volatile　and　vital　energy　of　the　aerial　juices　as　thyself；

has　awakened　faculties　that　cannot　sleep；faculties　that　may

yet；　with　patient　humility；　with　sound　faith；　and　the　courage

that　is　not　of　the　body　like　thine；　but　of　the　resolute　and

virtuous　mind；　attain；　if　not　to　the　knowledge　that　reigns　above；

to　high　achievement　in　the　career　of　men。　　Thou　wilt　find　the

restless　influence　in　all　that　thou　wouldst　undertake。　　Thy

heart；　amidst　vulgar　joys　will　aspire　to　something　holier；　thy

ambition；　amidst　coarse　excitement；　to　something　beyond　thy

reach。　　But　deem　not　that　this　of　itself　will　suffice　for　glory。

Equally　may　the　craving　lead　thee　to　shame　and　guilt。　　It　is　but

an　imperfect　and　new…born　energy　which　will　not　suffer　thee　to

repose。　　As　thou　directest　it；　must　thou　believe　it　to　be　the

emanation　of　thine　evil　genius　or　thy　good。



〃But　woe　to　thee！　insect　meshed　in　the　web　in　which　thou　hast

entangled　limbs　and　wings！　　Thou　hast　not　only　inhaled　the

elixir；　thou　hast　conjured　the　spectre；　of　all　the　tribes　of　the

space；　no　foe　is　so　malignant　to　man；and　thou　hast　lifted　the

veil　from　thy　gaze。　　I　cannot　restore　to　thee　the　happy　dimness

of　thy　vision。　　Know；　at　least；　that　all　of　usthe　highest　and

the　wisestwho　have；　in　sober　truth；　passed　beyond　the

threshold；　have　had；　as　our　first　fearful　task；　to　master　and

subdue　its　grisly　and　appalling　guardian。　　Know　that　thou　CANST

deliver　thyself　from　those　livid　eyes；know　that；　while　they

haunt；　they　cannot　harm；　if　thou　resistest　the　thoughts　to　which

they　tempt；　and　the　horror　they　engender。　　DREAD　THEM　MOST　WHEN

THOU　BEHOLDEST　THEM　NOT。　　And　thus；　son　of　the　worm；　we　part！

All　that　I　can　tell　thee　to　encourage；　yet　to　warn　and　to　guide；

I　have　told　thee　in　these　lines。　　Not　from　me；　from　thyself　has

come　the　gloomy　trial　from　which　I　yet　trust　thou　wilt　emerge

into　peace。　　Type　of　the　knowledge　that　I　serve；　I　withhold　no

lesson　from　the　pure　aspirant；　I　am　a　dark　enigma　to　the　general

seeker。　　As　man's　only　indestructible　possession　is　his　memory；

so　it　is　not　in　mine　art　to　crumble　into　matter　the　immaterial

thoughts　that　have　sprung　up　within　thy　breast。　　The　tyro　might

shatter　this　castle　to　the　dust；　and　topple　down　the　mountain　to

the　plain。　　The　master　has　no　power　to　say；　'Exist　no　more；'　to

one　THOUGHT　that　his　knowledge　has　inspired。　　Thou　mayst　change

the　thoughts　into　new　forms；　thou　mayst　rarefy　and　sublimate　it

into　a　finer　spirit；but　thou　canst　not　annihilate　that　which

has　no　home　but　in　the　memory；　no　substance　but　the　idea。　　EVERY

THOUGHT　IS　A　SOUL！　　Vainly；　therefore；　would　I　or　thou　undo　the

past；　or　restore　to　thee　the　gay　blindness　of　thy　youth。　　Thou

must　endure　the　influence　of　the　elixir　thou　hast　inhaled；　thou

must　wrestle　with　the　spectre　thou　hast　invoked！〃



The　letter　fell　from　Glyndon's　hand。　　A　sort　of　stupor　succeeded

to　the　various　emotions　which　had　chased　each　other　in　the

perusal；a　stupor　resembling　that　which　follows　the　sudden

destruction　of　any　ardent　and　long…nursed　hope　in　the　human

heart；　whether　it　be　of　love；　of　avarice；　of　ambition。　　The

loftier　world　for　which　he　had　so　thirsted；　sacrificed；　and

toiled；　was　closed　upon　him　〃forever；〃　and　by　his　own　faults　of

rashness　and　presumption。　　But　Glyndon's　was　not　of　that　nature

which　submits　long　to　condemn　itself。　　His　indignation　began　to

kindle　against　Mejnour；　who　owned　he　had　tempted；　and　who　now

abandoned　him；abandoned　him　to　the　presence　of　a　spectre。　　The

mystic's　reproaches　stung　rather　than　humbled　him。　　What　crime

had　he　committed　to　deserve　language　so　harsh　and　disdainful？

Was　it　so　deep　a　debasement　to　feel　pleasure　in　the　smile　and　the

eyes　of　Fillide？　　Had　not　Zanoni　himself　confessed　love　for

Viola；　had　he　not　fled　with　her　as　his　companion？　　Glyndon　never

paused　to　consider　if　there　are　no　distinctions　between　one　kind

of　love　and　another。　　Where；　too；　was　the　great　offence　of

yielding　to　a　temptation　which　only　existed　for　the　brave？　　Had

not　the　mystic　volume　which　Mejnour　had　purposely　left　open；　bid

him　but　〃Beware　of　fear〃？　　Was　not；　then；　every　wilful

provocative　held　out　to　the　strongest　influences　of　the　human

mind；　in　the　prohibition　to　enter　the　chamber；　in　the　possession

of　the　key　which　excited　his　curiosity；　in　the　volume　which

seemed　to　dictate　the　mode　by　which　the　curiosity　was　to　be

gratified？　　As　rapidly　these　thoughts　passed　over　him；　he　began

to　consider　the　whole　conduct　of　Mejnour　either　as　a　perfidious

design　to　entrap　him　to　his　own　misery；　or　as　the　trick　of　an

imposter；　who　knew　that　he　could　not　realise　the　great

professions　he　had　made。　　On　glancing　again　over　the　more

mysterious　threats　and　warnings　in　Mejnour's　letter；　they　seemed

to　assume　the　language　of　mere　parable　and　allegory；the　jargon

of　the　Platonists　and　Pythagoreans。　　By　little　and　little；　he

began　to　consider　that　the　very　spectra　he　had　seeneven　that

one　phantom　so　horrid　in　its　aspectwere　but　the　delusions　which

Mejnour's　science　had　enable　him　to　raise。　　The　healthful

sunlight；　filling　up　every　cranny　in　his　chamber；　seemed　to　laugh

away　the　terrors　of　the　past　night。　　His　pride　and　his　resentment

nerved　his　habitual　courage；　and　when；　having　hastily　dressed

himself；　he　rejoined　Paolo；　it　was　with　a　flushed　cheek　and　a

haughty　step。



〃So；　Paolo；〃　said　he；　〃the　Padrone；　as　you　call　him；　told　you　to

expect　and　welcome　me　at　your　village　feast？〃



〃He　did　so　by　a　message　from　a　wretched　old　cripple。　　This

surprised　me　at　the　time；　for　I　thought　he　was　far　distant；　but

these　great　philosophers　make　a　joke　of　two　or　three　hundred

leagues。〃



〃Why　did　you　not　tell　me　you　had　heard　from　Mejnour？〃



〃Because　the　old　cripple　forbade　me。〃



〃Did　you　not　see　the　man　afterwards　during　the　dance？〃



〃No；　Excellency。〃



〃Humph！〃



〃Allow　me　to　serve　you；〃　said　Paolo；　piling　Glyndon's　plate；　and

then　filling　his　glass。　　〃I　wish；　signor；　now　the　Padrone　is

gone；not；〃　added　Paolo；　as　he　cast　rather　a　frightened　and

suspicious　glance　round　the　room；　〃that　I　mean　to　say　anything

disrespectful　of　him；I　wish；　I　say；　now　that　he　is　gone；　that

you　would　take　pity　on　yourself；　and　ask　your　own　heart　what　your

youth　was　meant　for？　　Not　to　bury　yourself　alive　in　these　old

ruins；　and　endanger　body　and　soul　by　studies　which　I　am　sure　no

saint　could　approve　of。〃



〃Are　the　saints　so　partial；　then；　to　your　own　occupations；　Master

Paolo？〃



〃Why；〃　answered　the　bandit；　a　little　confus