all roads lead to calvary-第21节

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She　seized　at　the　chance　of　changing　the　subject。

〃It　was　a　foolish　notion；〃　she　said；　〃that　of　the　Manchester　school：　　that　men　and　women　could　be　treated　as　mere　figures　in　a　sum。〃

To　her　surprise；　he　agreed　with　her。　　〃The　feudal　system　had　a　fine　idea　in　it；〃　he　said；　〃if　it　had　been　honestly　carried　out。　　A　master　should　be　the　friend；　the　helper　of　his　men。　　They　should　be　one　family。〃

She　looked　at　him　a　little　incredulously；　remembering　the　bitter　periods　of　strikes　and　lock…outs。

〃Did　you　ever　try；　Dad？〃　she　asked。

〃Oh；　yes；〃　he　answered。　　〃But　I　tried　the　wrong　way。〃　　〃The　right　way　might　be　found；〃　he　added；　〃by　the　right　man；　and　woman。〃

She　felt　that　he　was　watching　her　through　his　half…closed　eyes。　〃There　are　those　cottages；〃　he　continued；　〃just　before　you　come　to　the　bridge。　　They　might　be　repaired　and　a　club　house　added。　　The　idea　is　catching　on；　they　tell　me。　　Garden　villages；　they　call　them　now。　　It　gets　the　men　and　women　away　from　the　dirty　streets；　and　gives　the　children　a　chance。〃

She　knew　the　place。　　A　sad　group　of　dilapidated　little　houses　forming　three　sides　of　a　paved　quadrangle；　with　a　shattered　fountain　and　withered　trees　in　the　centre。　　Ever　since　she　could　remember；　they　had　stood　there　empty；　ghostly；　with　creaking　doors　and　broken　windows；　their　gardens　overgrown　with　weeds。

〃Are　they　yours？〃　she　asked。　　She　had　never　connected　them　with　the　works；　some　half　a　mile　away。　　Though　had　she　been　curious；　she　might　have　learnt　that　they　were　known　as　〃Allway's　Folly。〃

〃Your　mother's；〃　he　answered。　　〃I　built　them　the　year　I　came　back　from　America　and　gave　them　to　her。　　I　thought　it　would　interest　her。　　Perhaps　it　would；　if　I　had　left　her　to　her　own　ways。〃

〃Why　didn't　they　want　them？〃　she　asked。

〃They　did；　at　first；〃　he　answered。　　〃The　time…servers　and　the　hypocrites　among　them。　　I　made　it　a　condition　that　they　should　be　teetotallers；　and　chapel　goers；　and　everything　else　that　I　thought　good　for　them。　　I　thought　that　I　could　save　their　souls　by　bribing　them　with　cheap　rents　and　share　of　profits。　　And　then　the　Union　came；　and　that　of　course　finished　it。〃

So　he；　too；　had　thought　to　build　Jerusalem。

〃Yes；〃　he　said。　　〃I'll　sound　him　about　giving　up　his　lodgings。〃

Joan　lay　awake　for　a　long　while　that　night。　　The　moon　looked　in　at　the　window。　　It　seemed　to　have　got　itself　entangled　in　the　tops　of　the　tall　pines。　　Would　it　not　be　her　duty　to　come　backmake　her　father　happy；　to　say　nothing　of　the　other。　　He　was　a　dear；　sweet；　lovable　lad。　　Together；　they　might　realize　her　father's　dream：　repair　the　blunders；　plant　gardens　where　the　weeds　now　grew；　drive　out　the　old　sad　ghosts　with　living　voices。　　It　had　been　a　fine　thought；　a　〃King's　thought。〃　　Others　had　followed；　profiting　by　his　mistakes。　　But　might　it　not　be　carried　further　than　even　they　had　gone；　shaped　into　some　noble　venture　that　should　serve　the　future。

Was　not　her　America　here？　　Why　seek　it　further？　　What　was　this　unknown　Force；　that；　against　all　sense　and　reason；　seemed　driving　her　out　into　the　wilderness　to　preach。　　Might　it　not　be　mere　vanity；　mere　egoism。　　Almost　she　had　convinced　herself。

And　then　there　flashed　remembrance　of　her　mother。　　She；　too；　had　laid　aside　herself；　had　thought　that　love　and　duty　could　teach　one　to　be　other　than　one　was。　　The　Ego　was　the　all　important　thing；　entrusted　to　us　as　the　talents　of　silver　to　the　faithful　servant：　to　be　developed；　not　for　our　own　purposes；　but　for　the　service　of　the　Master。

One　did　no　good　by　suppressing　one's　nature。　　In　the　end　it　proved　too　strong。　　Marriage　with　Arthur　would　be　only　repeating　the　mistake。　　To　be　worshipped；　to　be　served。　　It　would　be　very　pleasant；　when　one　was　in　the　mood。　　But　it　would　not　satisfy　her。　There　was　something　strong　and　fierce　and　primitive　in　her　nature　something　that　had　come　down　to　her　through　the　generations　from　some　harness…girded　ancestresssomething　impelling　her　instinctively　to　choose　the　fighter；　to　share　with　him　the　joy　of　battle；　healing　his　wounds；　giving　him　of　her　courage；　exulting　with　him　in　the　victory。

The　moon　had　risen　clear　of　the　entangling　pines。　　It　rode　serene　and　free。

Her　father　came　to　the　station　with　her　in　the　morning。　　The　train　was　not　in：　　and　they　walked　up　and　down　and　talked。　　Suddenly　she　remembered：　　it　had　slipped　her　mind。

〃Could　I；　as　a　child；　have　known　an　old　clergyman？〃　she　asked　him。　〃At　least　he　wouldn't　have　been　old　then。　　I　dropped　into　Chelsea　Church　one　evening　and　heard　him　preach；　and　on　the　way　home　I　passed　him　again　in　the　street。　　It　seemed　to　me　that　I　had　seen　his　face　before。　　But　not　for　many　years。　　I　meant　to　write　you　about　it；　but　forgot。〃

He　had　to　turn　aside　for　a　moment　to　speak　to　an　acquaintance　about　business。

〃Oh；　it's　possible；〃　he　answered　on　rejoining　her。　　〃What　was　his　name？〃

〃I　do　not　know；〃　she　answered。　　〃He　was　not　the　regular　Incumbent。　But　it　was　someone　that　I　seemed　to　know　quite　wellthat　I　must　have　been　familiar　with。〃

〃It　may　have　been；〃　he　answered　carelessly；　〃though　the　gulf　was　wider　then　than　it　is　now。　　I'll　try　and　think。　　Perhaps　it　is　only　your　fancy。〃

The　train　drew　in；　and　he　found　her　a　corner　seat；　and　stood　talking　by　the　window；　about　common　things。

〃What　did　he　preach　about？〃　he　asked　her　unexpectedly。

She　was　puzzled　for　the　moment。　　〃Oh；　the　old　clergyman；〃　she　answered；　recollecting。　　〃Oh；　Calvary。　　All　roads　lead　to　Calvary；　he　thought。　　It　was　rather　interesting。〃

She　looked　back　at　the　end　of　the　platform。　　He　had　not　moved。



CHAPTER　IX



A　pile　of　correspondence　was　awaiting　her　and；　standing　by　the　desk；　she　began　to　open　and　read　it。　　Suddenly　she　paused；　conscious　that　someone　had　entered　the　room　and；　turning；　she　saw　Hilda。　　She　must　have　left　the　door　ajar；　for　she　had　heard　no　sound。　　The　child　closed　the　door　noiselessly　and　came　across；　holding　out　a　letter。

〃Papa　told　me　to　give　you　this　the　moment　you　came　in；〃　she　said。　Joan　had　not　yet　taken　off　her　things。　　The　child　must　have　been　keeping　a　close　watch。　　Save　for　the　signature　it　contained　but　one　line：　　〃I　have　accepted。〃

Joan　replaced　the　letter　in　its　envelope；　and　laid　it　down　upon　the　desk。　　Unconsciously　a　smile　played　about　her　lips。

The　child　was　watching　her。　　〃I'm　glad　you　persuaded　him；〃　she　said。

Joan　felt　a　flush　mount　to　her　face。　　She　had　forgotten　Hilda　for　the　instant。

She　forced　a　laugh。　　〃Oh；　I　only　persuaded　him　to　do　what　he　had　made　up　his　mind　to　do；〃　she　explained。　　〃It　was　all　settled。〃

〃No；　it　wasn't；〃　answered　the　child。　　〃Most　of　them　were　against　it。　　And　then　there　was　Mama；〃　she　added　in　a　lower　tone。

〃What　do　you　mean；〃　asked　Joan。　　〃Didn't　she　wish　it？〃

The　child　raised　her　eyes。　　There　was　a　dull　anger　in　them。　　〃Oh；　what's　the　good　of　pretending；〃　she　said。　　〃He's　so　great。　　He　could　be　the　Prime　Minister　of　England　if　he　chose。　　But　then　he　would　have　to　visit　kings　and　nobles；　and　receive　them　at　his　house；　and　Mama〃　　She　broke　off　with　a　passionate　gesture　of　the　small　thin　hands。

Joan　was　puzzled　what　to　say。　　She　knew　exactly　what　she　ought　to　say：　　what　she　would　have　said　to　any　ordinary　child。　　But　to　say　it　to　this　uncannily　knowing　little　creature　did　not　promise　much　good。

〃Who　told　you　I　persuaded　him？〃　she　asked。

〃Nobody；〃　answered　the　child。　　〃I　knew。〃

Joan　seated　herself；　and　drew　the　child　towards　her。

〃It　isn't　as　terrible　as　you　think；〃　she　said。　　〃Many　men　who　have　risen　and　taken　a　high　place　in　the　world　were　married　to　kind；　good　women　unable　to　share　their　greatness。　　There　was　Shakespeare；　you　know；　who　married　Anne　Hathaway　and　had　a　clever　daughter。　　She　was　just　a　nice；　homely　body　a　few　years　older　than　himself。　　And　he　seems　to　have　been　very　fond　of　her；　and　was　always　running　down　to　Stratford　to　be　with　her。〃

〃Yes；　but　he　didn't　bring　her　up　to　London；〃　answered　the　child。　〃Mama　would　have　wanted　to　come；　and　Papa　would　have　let　her；　and　wouldn't　have　gone　to　see　Queen　Elizabeth　unless　she　had　been　invited　too。〃

Joan　wished　she　had　not　mentioned　Shakespeare。　　There　had　surely　been　others；　men　who　had　climbed　up　and　carried　their　impossible　wives　with　them。　　But　she　couldn't　think　of　one；　just　then。

〃We　must　help　her；〃　she　answered　somewhat　lamely。　　〃She's　anxious　to　learn；　I　know。〃

The　child　shook　her　head。　　〃She　doesn't　understand；〃　she　said。　〃And　Papa　won't　tell　her。　　He　says　it　would　only　hurt　her　and　do　no　good。〃　　The　small　hands　were　clenched。　　〃I　shall　hate　her　if　she　spoils　his　life。〃

The　atmosphere　was　becoming　tragic。　　Joan　felt　the　need　of　escaping　from　it。　　She　sprang　up。

〃Oh；　don't　be　nonsensical；〃　she　said。　　〃Your　father　isn't　the　only　man　married　to　a　woman　not　as　clever　as　himself。　　He　isn't　going　to　let　that　stop　him。　　And　your　mother's　going　to　learn　to　be　the　wife　of　a　great　man　and　do　the　best　she　can。　　And　if　they　don't　like　her　they've　got　to　put　up　with　her。　　I　shall　talk　to　the　both　of　them。〃　A　wave　of　motherliness　towards　the　entire　Phillips　family　passed　over　her。　　It　included　Hilda。　　She　caught　the　child　to　her　and　gave　her　a　hug。　　〃You　go　back　to　school；〃　she　said；　〃and　get　on　as　fast　as　you　can；　so　that　you'll　be　able　to　be　useful　to　him。〃

The　child　f