vanity fair(名利场)-第6节

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season？　What　causes　them　to　labour　at　pianoforte　sonatas；
and　to　learn　four　songs　from　a　fashionable　master　at　a
guinea　a　lesson；　and　to　play　the　harp　if　they　have
handsome　arms　and　neat　elbows；　and　to　wear　Lincoln
Green　toxophilite　hats　and　feathers；　but　that　they　may　bring
down　some　〃desirable〃　young　man　with　those　killing　bows
and　arrows　of　theirs？　What　causes　respectable　parents
to　take　up　their　carpets；　set　their　houses　topsy…turvy；　and
spend　a　fifth　of　their　year's　income　in　ball　suppers　and
iced　champagne？　Is　it　sheer　love　of　their　species；　and
an　unadulterated　wish　to　see　young　people　happy　and
dancing？　Psha！　they　want　to　marry　their　daughters；　and；
as　honest　Mrs。　Sedley　has；　in　the　depths　of　her　kind
heart；　already　arranged　a　score　of　little　schemes　for　the
settlement　of　her　Amelia；　so　also　had　our　beloved　but
unprotected　Rebecca　determined　to　do　her　very　best　to
secure　the　husband；　who　was　even　more　necessary　for
her　than　for　her　friend。　　She　had　a　vivid　imagination；　she
had；　besides；　read　the　Arabian　Nights　and　Guthrie's
Geography；　and　it　is　a　fact　that　while　she　was　dressing　for
dinner；　and　after　she　had　asked　Amelia　whether　her
brother　was　very　rich；　she　had　built　for　herself　a　most
magnificent　castle　in　the　air；　of　which　she　was　mistress；
with　a　husband　somewhere　in　the　background　（she　had
not　seen　him　as　yet；　and　his　figure　would　not　therefore
be　very　distinct）；　she　had　arrayed　herself　in　an　infinity
of　shawls；　turbans；　and　diamond　necklaces；　and　had
mounted　upon　an　elephant　to　the　sound　of　the　march　in
Bluebeard；　in　order　to　pay　a　visit　of　ceremony　to　the
Grand　Mogul。　　Charming　Alnaschar　visions！　it　is　the
happy　privilege　of　youth　to　construct　you；　and　many
a　fanciful　young　creature　besides　Rebecca　Sharp　has
indulged　in　these　delightful　day…dreams　ere　now！
Joseph　Sedley　was　twelve　years　older　than　his　sister
Amelia。　　He　was　in　the　East　India　Company's　Civil
Service；　and　his　name　appeared；　at　the　period　of　which
we　write；　in　the　Bengal　division　of　the　East　India　Register；
as　collector　of　Boggley　Wollah；　an　honourable　and
lucrative　post；　as　everybody　knows：　in　order　to　know
to　what　higher　posts　Joseph　rose　in　the　service；　the
reader　is　referred　to　the　same　periodical。
Boggley　Wollah　is　situated　in　a　fine；　lonely；　marshy；
jungly　district；　famous　for　snipe…shooting；　and　where
not　unfrequently　you　may　flush　a　tiger。　　Ramgunge；　where
there　is　a　magistrate；　is　only　forty　miles　off；　and　there
is　a　cavalry　station　about　thirty　miles　farther；　so　Joseph
wrote　home　to　his　parents；　when　he　took　possession　of
his　collectorship。　　He　had　lived　for　about　eight　years　of
his　life；　quite　alone；　at　this　charming　place；　scarcely
seeing　a　Christian　face　except　twice　a　year；　when　the
detachment　arrived　to　carry　off　the　revenues　which　he
had　collected；　to　Calcutta。
Luckily；　at　this　time　he　caught　a　liver　complaint；　for
the　cure　of　which　he　returned　to　Europe；　and　which
was　the　source　of　great　comfort　and　amusement　to　him
in　his　native　country。　　He　did　not　live　with　his　family
while　in　London；　but　had　lodgings　of　his　own；　like
a　gay　young　bachelor。　　Before　he　went　to　India　he　was
too　young　to　partake　of　the　delightful　pleasures　of　a
man　about　town；　and　plunged　into　them　on　his　return
with　considerable　assiduity。　　He　drove　his　horses　in　the
Park；　he　dined　at　the　fashionable　taverns　（for　the
Oriental　Club　was　not　as　yet　invented）；　he　frequented
the　theatres；　as　the　mode　was　in　those　days；　or　made
his　appearance　at　the　opera；　laboriously　attired　in　tights
and　a　cocked　hat。
On　returning　to　India；　and　ever　after；　he　used　to　talk
of　the　pleasure　of　this　period　of　his　existence　with　great
enthusiasm；　and　give　you　to　understand　that　he　and
Brummel　were　the　leading　bucks　of　the　day。　　But　he　was
as　lonely　here　as　in　his　jungle　at　Boggley　Wollah。　　He
scarcely　knew　a　single　soul　in　the　metropolis：　and　were
it　not　for　his　doctor；　and　the　society　of　his　blue…pill；
and　his　liver　complaint；　he　must　have　died　of　loneliness。
He　was　lazy；　peevish；　and　a　bon…vivan；　the　appearance
of　a　lady　frightened　him　beyond　measure；　hence　it　was
but　seldom　that　he　joined　the　paternal　circle　in　Russell
Square；　where　there　was　plenty　of　gaiety；　and　where　the
jokes　of　his　good…natured　old　father　frightened　his
amour…propre。　　His　bulk　caused　Joseph　much　anxious
thought　and　alarm；　now　and　then　he　would　make　a
desperate　attempt　to　get　rid　of　his　superabundant　fat；
but　his　indolence　and　love　of　good　living　speedily　got
the　better　of　these　endeavours　at　reform；　and　he　found
himself　again　at　his　three　meals　a　day。　　He　never　was
well　dressed；　but　he　took　the　hugest　pains　to　adorn　his
big　person；　and　passed　many　hours　daily　in　that　occupation。
His　valet　made　a　fortune　out　of　his　wardrobe：　his
toilet…table　was　covered　with　as　many　pomatums　and
essences　as　ever　were　employed　by　an　old　beauty：　he　had
tried；　in　order　to　give　himself　a　waist；　every　girth；　stay；
and　waistband　then　invented。　　Like　most　fat　men；　he
would　have　his　clothes　made　too　tight；　and　took　care
they　should　be　of　the　most　brilliant　colours　and　youthful
cut。　　When　dressed　at　length；　in　the　afternoon；　he　would
issue　forth　to　take　a　drive　with　nobody　in　the　Park；
and　then　would　come　back　in　order　to　dress　again　and
go　and　dine　with　nobody　at　the　Piazza　Coffee…House。
He　was　as　vain　as　a　girl；　and　perhaps　his　extreme
shyness　was　one　of　the　results　of　his　extreme　vanity。　　If
Miss　Rebecca　can　get　the　better　of　him；　and　at　her　first
entrance　into　life；　she　is　a　young　person　of　no　ordinary
cleverness。
The　first　move　showed　considerable　skill。　　When　she
called　Sedley　a　very　handsome　man；　she　knew　that
Amelia　would　tell　her　mother；　who　would　probably　tell
Joseph；　or　who；　at　any　rate；　would　be　pleased　by　the
compliment　paid　to　her　son。　　All　mothers　are。　　If　you
had　told　Sycorax　that　her　son　Caliban　was　as　handsome
as　Apollo；　she　would　have　been　pleased；　witch　as　she
was。　　Perhaps；　too；　Joseph　Sedley　would　overhear　the
complimentRebecca　spoke　loud　enoughand　he　did
hear；　and　（thinking　in　his　heart　that　he　was　a　very　fine
man）　the　praise　thrilled　through　every　fibre　of　his　big
body；　and　made　it　tingle　with　pleasure。　　Then；　however；
came　a　recoil。　　〃Is　the　girl　making　fun　of　me？〃　he　thought；
and　straightway　he　bounced　towards　the　bell；　and　was
for　retreating；　as　we　have　seen；　when　his　father's　jokes
and　his　mother's　entreaties　caused　him　to　pause　and
stay　where　he　was。　　He　conducted　the　young　lady　down
to　dinner　in　a　dubious　and　agitated　frame　of　mind。
〃Does　she　really　think　I　am　handsome？〃　thought　he；
〃or　is　she　only　making　game　of　me？〃　We　have　talked
of　Joseph　Sedley　being　as　vain　as　a　girl。　　Heaven　help
us！　the　girls　have　only　to　turn　the　tables；　and　say
of　one　of　their　own　sex；　〃She　is　as　vain　as　a　man；〃
and　they　will　have　perfect　reason。　　The　bearded　creatures
are　quite　as　eager　for　praise；　quite　as　finikin　over　their
toilettes；　quite　as　proud　of　their　personal　advantages；
quite　as　conscious　of　their　powers　of　fascination；　as
any　coquette　in　the　world。
Downstairs；　then；　they　went；　Joseph　very　red　and
blushing；　Rebecca　very　modest；　and　holding　her　green
eyes　downwards。　　She　was　dressed　in　white；　with　bare
shoulders　as　white　as　snowthe　picture　of　youth；
unprotected　innocence；　and　humble　virgin　simplicity。
〃I　must　be　very　quiet；〃　thought　Rebecca；　〃and　very　much
interested　about　India。〃
Now　we　have　heard　how　Mrs。　Sedley　had　prepared　a
fine　curry　for　her　son；　just　as　he　liked　it；　and　in　the
course　of　dinner　a　portion　of　this　dish　was　offered　to
Rebecca。　　〃What　is　it？〃　said　she；　turning　an　appealing
look　to　Mr。　Joseph。
〃Capital；〃　said　he。　　His　mouth　was　full　of　it：　his　face
quite　red　with　the　delightful　exercise　of　gobbling。　
〃Mother；　it's　as　good　as　my　own　curries　in　India。〃
〃Oh；　I　must　try　some；　if　it　is　an　Indian　dish；〃　said
Miss　Rebecca。　　〃I　am　sure　everything　must　be　good　that
comes　from　there。〃
〃Give　Miss　Sharp　some　curry；　my　dear；〃　said　Mr。
Sedley；　laughing。
Rebecca　had　never　tasted　the　dish　before。
〃Do　you　find　it　as　good　as　everything　else　from　India？〃
said　Mr。　Sedley。
〃Oh；　excellent！〃　said　Rebecca；　who　was　suffering
tortures　with　the　cayenne　pepper。
〃Try　a　chili　with　it；　Miss　Sharp；〃　said　Joseph；　really
interested。
〃A　chili；〃　said　Rebecca；　gasping。　　〃Oh　yes！〃　　She　thought
a　chili　was　something　cool；　as　its　name　imported；
and　was　served　with　some。　　〃How　fresh　and　green　they
look；〃　she　said；　and　put　one　into　her　mouth。　　It　was
hotter　than　the　curry；　flesh　and　blood　could　bear　it　no
longer。　　She　laid　down　her　fork。　　〃Water；　for　Heaven's
sake；　water！〃　she　cried。　　Mr。　Sedley　burst　out　laughing
（he　was　a　coarse　man；　from　the　Stock　Exchange；　where
they　love　all　sorts　of　practical　jokes）。　　〃They　are　real
Indian；　I　assure　you；〃　said　he。　　〃Sambo；　give　Miss　Sharp
some　water。〃
The　paternal　laugh　was　echoed　by　Joseph；　who　thought
the　joke　capital。　　The　ladies　only　smiled　a　little。　　They
thought　poor　Rebecca　suffered　too　much。　　She　would　have
liked　to　choke　old　Sedley；　but　she　swallowed　her
mortification　as　well　as　she　had　the　abominable　curry
before　it；　and　as　soon　as　she　could　speak；　said；　with　a　comical；
good…humoured　air；　〃I　ought　to　have　remembered　the
pepper　which　the　P