anner.bloodandgold(v2)-第10节

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　　　〃It　had　been　a　long；　long　time　since　I'd　revealed　that　secret。　I'd　been　alone　for　a　century　among　mortals。　And　Lestat；　so　absolute　in　his　devotion　to　me；　seemed　pletely　worthy　of　my　trust。
　　　〃I　took　him　down　to　the　underground　shrine。　I　opened　the　door　upon　the　two　seated　figures。
　　　〃For　the　first　few　moments；　he　believed　the　Sacred　Parents　were　statues；　but　quite　suddenly　he　became　aware　that　both　were　alive。　He　realized　in　fact　that　they　were　blood　drinkers；　and　that　they　were　greatly　advanced　in　age；　and　that　in　them；　he　could　see　his　destiny　were　he　to　endure　for　so　many　thousands　of　years。
　　　〃This　is　a　terrifying　realization。　Even　to　the　young　who　look　on　me；　it　is　a　difficult　realization　that　they　might　bee　as　pale　and　hard　as　I　am。　With　the　Mother　and　Father；　it　was　horrifying；　and　Lestat　was　overe　with　fear。
　　　〃Nevertheless；　he　managed　to　bridle　his　fear　and　approach　the　Queen；　and　even　to　kiss　her　on　the　lips。　It　was　a　bold　thing　to　do；　but　as　I　watched　him　I　realized　it　was　quite　natural　to　him；　and　as　he　withdrew　from　her；　he　confessed　to　me　that　he　knew　her　name。
　　　〃Akasha。　It　was　as　if　she'd　spoken　it。　And　I　could　not　deny　that　she　had　given　it　to　him　through　his　mind。　Out　of　her　centuries　of　silence　had　e　her　voice　once　more　with　this　seductive　confession。
　　　〃Understand　how　young　he　was。　Given　the　blood　at　twenty；　he　had　been　a　blood　drinker　for　perhaps　ten　years；　no　more　than　that。
　　　
　　　〃What　was　I　to　make　of　this　kiss　and　this　secret　revelation？
　　　〃I　denied　my　love　and　my　jealousy　pletely。　I　denied　my　crushing　disappointment。　I　told　myself；　'You　are　too　wise　for　such。　Learn　from　what's　happened。　Maybe　this　young　one　will　bring　something　magnificent　from　her。　Is　she　not　a　goddess？'
　　　〃I　took　Lestat　to　my　salon；　a　room　as　fortable　as　this；　though　in　another　style；　and　there　we　talked　until　early　morn。　I　told　him　the　tale　of　my　making；　of　my　journey　to　Egypt。　I　played　the　teacher　with　great　earnestness　and　generosity；　and　something　of　pure　self…indulgence。　Was　it　for　Lestat　or　for　me　that　I　wanted　him　to　know　everything？　I　don't　know。　But　those　were　splendid　hours　for　me；　I　know　that　much。
　　　〃The　following　night；　however；　while　I　was　about　tending　to　the　mortals　who　lived　on　my　island　and　believed　me　to　be　their　lord；　Lestat　did　a　dreadful　thing。
　　　〃Taking　from　his　own　luggage　a　violin　which　was　most　precious　to　him…a　musical　instrument　of　uncanny　power…he　went　down　into　the　shrine。
　　　〃Now　it　is　plain　to　me；　as　it　was　then；　that　he　could　not　have　done　this　without　the　aid　of　the　Queen；　who　with　the　Mind　Gift　opened　the　many　doors　for　him　that　lay　between　him　and　her。
　　　〃Indeed　as　Lestat　tells　it；　she　may　have　even　put　the　very　idea　of　playing　the　instrument　into　his　mind。　I　don't　think　so。　I　think　she　opened　the　doors　and　summoned　him；　but　it　was　he　who　brought　the　violin。
　　　〃Calculating　that　it　would　make　a　sound　totally　unfamiliar　and　quite　wonderful　to　her；　he　set　out　to　mimic　those　he'd　seen　playing　the　instrument；　because　in　fact　he　didn't　know　how　to　play　it。
　　　〃Within　moments；　my　beautiful　Queen　had　risen　from　the　throne　and　was　moving　towards　him。　And　he　in　his　terror　had　dropped　the　violin　which　she　crushed　with　her　foot。　No　matter。　She　took　him　in　her　arms。　She　offered　her　blood　to　him；　and　then　there　happened　something　so　remarkable　that　it's　painful　for　me　to　reveal　it。　Not　only　did　she　allow　him　to　drink　from　her；　she　also　drank　from　him。　　〃It　seems　a　simple　thing；　but　it　is　not。　For　in　all　my　centuries　of　ing　to　her；　of　taking　blood　from　her；　I　had　never　felt　the　press　of　her　teeth　against　me。
　　　　〃Indeed；　I　know　of　no　supplicant　whose　blood　she　ever　drank。　Once　there　was　a　sacrifice；　and　yes；　she　drank　from　that　victim；　and　that　victim　was　destroyed。　But　from　her　supplicants？　Never。　She　was　the　fount；　the　giver；　the　healer　of　blood　gods；　and　burnt　children；　but　she　did　not　drink　from　them。
　　　〃Yet　she　drank　from　Lestat。
　　　〃What　did　she　see　in　those　moments？　I　cannot　imagine；　yet　it　must　have　been　a　glimpse　into　the　years　of　that　time。　It　must　have　been　a　glimpse　into　Lestat's　soul。　Whatever　it　was；　it　was　momentary；　for　her　consort　Enkil　soon　rose　and　moved　to　stop　it；　and　by　this　time；　I　had　arrived；　and　was　trying　desperately　and　successfully　to　prevent　Lestat　from　being　destroyed　by　Enkil　who　seemed　to　have　no　other　purpose。
　　　〃The　King　and　Queen　returned　to　their　throne；　besmirched　and　bloody　and　finally　silent。　But　for　the　rest　of　the　night　Enkil　was　restless；　destroying　the　vases　and　braziers　of　the　shrine。
　　　〃It　was　a　terrifying　display　of　power。　And　I　realized　that　for　his　safety；　indeed；　even　for　my　own；　I　must　say　farewell　at　once　to　Lestat；　which　caused　me　excruciating　pain；　and　so　we　parted　the　following　night。〃
　　　Marius　fell　silent　again；　and　Thorne　waited　patiently。　Then　Marius　began　to　speak　once　more。
　　　〃I　don't　know　what　caused　me　the　worst　pain…the　loss　of　Lestat；　or　my　jealousy　that　she　had　given　and　taken　with　him。　I'm　unable　to　know　my　own　mind。　You　understand　I　felt　I　possessed　her。　I　felt　she　was　my　Queen。〃　His　voice　dropped　to　a　whisper。　〃When　I　revealed　her　to　him；　I　was　displaying　a　possession！　You　see　what　a　liar　I　was？〃　he　asked。　〃And　then　to　lose　him；　to　lose　this　young　one　with　whom　I　felt　such　utter　munion。　Ah；　that　was　such　rich　pain。　Rather　like　the　music　of　the　violin；　I　think；　just　as　deeply　colored；　such　terrible　pain。〃
　　　〃What　can　I　do　to　ease　your　sorrow　now？〃　asked　Thorne。　〃For　you　carry　it；　as　if　she　were　here　still。〃
　　　Marius　looked　up；　and　suddenly　an　expression　of　pure　surprise　brightened　his　face。　〃You're　right；〃　he　said。　〃I　carry　the　obligation；　as　if　she　were　still　with　me；　as　if　even　now　I　had　to　go　and　spend　my　hours　in　her　shrine。〃
　　　〃Can't　you　be　glad　that　it's　over？〃　asked　Thorne。　〃It　seemed　when　I　lay　in　my　cave　of　ice；　when　I　saw　these　things　in　dreams　that　there　were　others　who　were　at　peace　when　it　was　finished。　Even　the　red…haired　twins　whom　I　saw　standing　before　everyone　seemed　to　have　a　sense　that　it　was　done。〃
　　　Marius　nodded。　〃They　do　all　share　this；〃　said　Marius；　〃except　perhaps　for　Lestat。〃　He　looked　wondering　at　Thorne。
　　　
　　　〃Tell　me　now　how　she　was　wakened　finally；〃　said　Thorne；　〃how　she　became　the　slayer　of　her　children。　I　felt　her　pass　me；　close　and　with　a　searching　eye；　yet　somehow　I　was　not　found。〃
　　　　　〃Others　as　well　escaped　her；〃　said　Marius；　〃though　how　many　no　one　knows。　She　tired　of　her　slaughter　and　she　came　to　us。　I　think　she　thought　that　she　had　time　to　finish。　But　her　end　came　swiftly　enough。
　　　〃As　for　the　second　resurrection；　it　was　Lestat　again；　but　I　am　as　much　to　blame　myself。
　　　〃This　is　what　I　believe　happened。　I　brought　the　inventions　of　the　modern　world　to　her　as　offerings。　At　first　it　was　the　machines　that　played　music；　and　then　came　those　which　would　show　moving　pictures。
　　　At　last；　I　brought　the　most　powerful　of　all；　the　television　that　would　play　constantly。　I　set　it　in　her　shrine　as　though　it　were　a　sacrifice。〃
　　　〃And　she　fed　upon　this　thing；〃　said　Thorne；　〃as　gods　are　wont　to　do　when　they　e　down　to　their　altars。〃
　　　〃Yes；　she　fed　upon　it。　She　fed　upon　its　terrible　electric　violence。　Lurid　colors　flashed　over　her　face；　and　images　accosted　her。　It　might　have　wakened　her　with　the　sheer　clamor。　And　I　wonder　sometimes　if　the　endless　public　talk　of　the　great　world　could　not　have　in　itself　inspired　an　imitation　of　a　mind　in　her。〃
　　　〃An　imitation　of　a　mind？〃
　　　〃She　awoke　with　a　simple　ugly　sense　of　purpose。　She　would　rule　this　world。〃
　　　Marius　shook　his　head。　His　attitude　was　one　of　profound　sadness。
　　　〃She　would　outwit　its　finest　human　minds；〃　he　said　sorrowfully。　〃She　would　destroy　the　vast　majority　of　this　world's　male　children。　In　a　female　paradise；　she　could　create　and　enforce　peace。　It　was　nonsense…　a　concept　drenched　in　violence　and　blood。
　　　　And　those　of　us　who　tried　to　reason　with　her　had　to　take　great　care　with　our　words　not　to　insult　her。　Where　could　she　have　gotten　these　notions；　except　from　the　bits　and　pieces　of　electric　dreams　that　she　watched　on　the　giant　screen　I'd　provided　for　her？　Fictions　of　all　kinds；　and　what　the　world　calls　News；　all　this　had　inundated　her。　I　had　loosed　the　flood。〃
　　　Marius's　gaze　flashed　on　Thorne　as　he　continued：　〃Of　course　she　saw　the　vivid　video　songs　of　The　Vampire　Lestat。〃　Marius　smiled　again；　but　it　was　a　sad　smile；　and　it　brightened　his　face　as　sad　songs　brighten　a　face。　〃And　Lestat　presented　in　his　video　films　the　very　image　of　her　on　her　throne　as　he　had　seen　her　centuries　ago。　Breaking　faith　with　me；　he　told　the　secrets　I　had　confided　to　him。〃
　　　〃Why　didn't　you　destroy　him　for　this！〃　said　Thorne；　before　he　could　stop　himself。　〃I　would　have　done　so。〃
　　　Marius　only　shook　his　head。
　　　〃I　think　I've　chosen　to　destroy　myself　instead；〃　he　said。　〃I've　chosen　to　let　my　heart　break　inside　me。〃
　　　〃Why；　explain　this　thing　to　me。〃
　　　〃I　can't；　I　can't　explain　it　to　myself；〃　said　Marius。　〃Perhaps　I　understand　Lestat　only　too　well。　He　couldn't　endure　the　vow　of　silence　he'd　given　me。　Not　in　this　world　you　see　around　you　with　all　its　wonders。　He　felt　driven　to　reveal　our　history。〃　The　heat　danced　in　Marius's　face。　His　fingers　gripped　the　arms　of　his　chair　with