rh.royalassassin-第76节

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e　land　and　a　view　of　exactly　what　was　happening。　Weapons　were　seized　and　we　rushed　toward　the　sounds　of　the　fighting。　Justin　stayed　with　the　Rurisk；　standing　and　staring　into　the　fog　toward　Buckkeep　earnestly；　as　if　that　would　help　him　Skill　the　news　to　Serene。
　　　　　　　The　Red…Ship　was　drawn　up　on　the　sand；　just　as　the　Rurisk　was。　Not　far　from　her　were　the　two　small　boats　that　served　as　ferries　to　the　mainland。　Both　had　been　stove　in。　There　had　been　Six　Duchies　men　down　here　on　the　beach　when　the　Red…Ships　arrived。　Some　of　them　were　still　there。　Carnage。　We　ran　past　crumpled　bodies　leaking　blood　into　the　sand。　All　of　them　seemed　to　be　our　own　folk。　Suddenly　the　Antler　Island　inner　tower　loomed　gray　above　us。　Atop　it　her　signal　fire　burned　a　ghostly　yellow　in　the　fog。　The　tower　was　besieged。　The　Raiders　were　dark　muscular　men；　wiry　rather　than　massive。　Most　were　heavily　bearded　and　their　hair　hung　black　and　wild　to　their　shoulders。　They　wore　body　armor　of　plaited　leather　and　carried　heavy　blades　and　axes。　Some　wore　helms　of　metal。　Their　bared　arms　were　marked　in　coils　of　scarlet；　but　whether　this　was　tattoo　or　paint　I　could　not　tell。　They　were　confident；　swaggering；　laughing；　and　talking　like　workmen　pleting　a　task。　The　guardians　of　the　tower　were　cornered；　the　structure　had　been　built　as　a　basis　for　a　signal　light；　not　as　a　defensible　rampart。　It　was　a　matter　of　time　before　all　the　cornered　men　were　dead。　The　Outislanders　did　not　look　back　toward　us　as　we　came　pouring　up　the　rocky　incline。　They　believed　they　had　nothing　to　fear　from　behind　them。　One　tower　gate　hung　on　its　hinges；　a　huddle　of　men　inside　barricaded　behind　a　wall　of　bodies。　As　we　advanced　they　sent　a　thin　hail　of　arrows　out　toward　the　encircled　Raiders。　None　of　them　hit。
　　　　　　　I　gave　a　cry　between　a　whoop　and　a　howl；　terrible　fear　and　vengeful　joy　merged　into　one　sound。　The　emotions　of　those　who　ran　beside　me　found　vent　in　me；　and　spurred　me　on。　The　attackers　turned　to　see　us　as　we　closed　with　them。
　　　　　　　We　caught　the　Raiders　between　us。　Our　ship's　crew　outnumbered　them；　and　at　sight　of　us；　the　beleaguered　defenders　of　the　tower　took　heart　and　poured　forth　themselves。　Scattered　bodies　about　the　tower　gate　attested　to　several　efforts　before　this　one。　The　young　watchman　still　lay　where　I　had　seen　him　fall　in　my　dream。　Blood　had　spilled　from　his　mouth　and　soaked　into　his　embroidered　shirt。　A　dagger　thrown　from　behind　had　taken　him。　An　odd　detail　to　note　as　we　rushed　forward　to　join　in　the　melee。
　　　　　　　There　was　no　strategy；　no　formation；　no　plan　of…battle。　Simply　a　group　of　men　and　women　suddenly　offered　the　opportunity　for　vengeance。　It　was　more　than　enough。
　　　　　　　If　I　thought　I　had　been　one　with　the　crew　before；　I　was　now　engulfed　in　them。　Emotions　battered　and　thrust　me　forward。　I　will　never　know　how　much　or　which　feelings　were　my　own。　They　overwhelmed　me；　and　FitzChivalry　was　lost　in　them。　I　became　the　emotions　of　the　crew。　Ax　raised；　roaring；　I　led　the　way。　I　had　no　desire　for　the　position　I　had　seized。　Instead　I　was　thrust　forward　by　the　crew's　extreme　desire　for　someone　to　follow。　I　suddenly　wanted　to　kill　as　many　Raiders　as　I　could；　as　fast　as　I　could。　I　wanted　my　muscles　to　crack　with　each　swing；　I　wanted　to　fling　myself　forward　through　a　tide　of　dispossessed　souls；　to　tread　on　the　bodies　of　fallen　Raiders。　And　I　did。
　　　　　　　I　had　heard　legends　of　berserks。　I　had　thought　them　animalistic　brutes；　powered　by　bloodlust；　insensitive　to　the　damage　they　wrought。　Perhaps；　instead；　they　were　oversensitized；　unable　to　defend　their　own　minds　from　the　emotions　that　rushed　in　to　drive　them；　unable　to　heed　the　pain　signals　of　their　own　bodies。　I　do　not　know。
　　　　　　　I　have　heard　tales　of　myself　on　that　day。　Even　a　song。　I　do　not　recall　that　I　frothed　and　roared　as　I　fought。　But　neither　do　I　recall　that　I　did　not。　Somewhere；　within　me；　were　both　Verity　and　Nighteyes；　but　they；　too；　were　drowned　in　the　passions　of　those　around　me。　I　know　I　killed　the　first　Raider　that　went　down　before　our　mad　rush。　I　also　know　that　I　finished　the　last　standing　man；　in　a　battle　we　fought　ax　to　ax。　The　song　says　it　was　the　master　of　the　Red…Ship　vessel。　I　suppose　it　could　have　been。　His　leather　surcoat　was　well　made；　and　spattered　with　the　blood　of　other　men。　I　don't　recall　another　thing　about　him　except　how　my　ax　crushed　his　helm　deep　into　his　skull；　and　how　the　blood　gouted　from　beneath　the　metal　as　he　sank　to　his　knees。
　　　　　　　So　the　battle　ended；　and　defenders　rushed　forth　to　embrace　our　crew；　to　shout　the　victory　and　pound　one　another's　backs。　The　change　was　too　much　for　me。　I　stood；　leaning　on　my　ax；　and　wondered　where　my　strength　had　fled。　The　anger　had　abandoned　me　as　suddenly　as　carris　seed　leaves　an　addict。　I　felt　drained　and　disoriented；　as　if　I　had　wakened　from　one　dream　into　another。　I　could　have　dropped　and　slept　among　the　bodies；　so　totally　exhausted　was　I。　It　was　Nonge；　one　of　the　Outislanders　in　the　crew；　who　brought　me　water；　and　then　walked　me　clear　of　the　bodies　so　I　could　sit　down　to　drink　it。　Then　he　waded　back　in　among　the　carnage　to　join　in　the　looting。　When　he　came　back　to　me　a　while　later；　he　held　out　to　me　a　bloodied　medallion。　It　was　hammered　gold；　on　a　silver　chain。　A　crescent　moon。　When　I　did　not　reach　to　take　it　from　him；　he　looped　it　over　the　gory　head　of　my　ax。　〃It　was　Harek's；〃　he　said；　finding　the　Six　Duchies　words　slowly。　〃You　fought　him　well。　He　died　well。　He'd　want　you　to　have　it。　He　was　a　good　man；　before　the　Korriks　took　his　heart。〃　I　did　not　even　ask　him　which　one　had　been　Harek。　I　did　not　want　any　of　them　to　have　names。
　　　　　　　After　a　time　I　began　to　be　alive　again。　I　helped　to　clear　the　bodies　from　the　door　of　the　tower；　and　then　from　the　battlefield。　The　Raiders　we　burned；　the　Six　Duchies　men　we　laid　out　and　covered；　for　kin　to　claim。　I　remember　odd　things　about　that　long　afternoon。　How　a　dead　man's　heels　leave　a　snaking　trail　in　the　sand　when　you　drag　him。　How　the　young　watchman　with　the　dagger　in　him　wasn't　quite　dead　when　we　went　to　gather　him　up。　Not　that　he　lasted　long　afterward。　He　soon　was　just　one　more　body　to　add　to　a　row　that　was　too　long　already。
　　　　　　　We　left　our　warriors　with　what　was　left　of　the　tower　guard　to　help　fill　up　the　watches　until　more　men　could　be　sent　out。
　　　　　　　We　admired　the　vessel　we'd　captured。　Verity　would　be　pleased；　I　thought　to　myself。　Another　ship。　A　very　well…made　one。　I　knew　all　these　things；　but　felt　nothing　about　any　of　them。　We　returned　to　the　Rurisk；　where　a　pale　Justin　awaited　us。　In　a　numbed　silence；　we　launched　the　Rurisk　and　took　our　places　at　the　oars　and　headed　back　to　Buckkeep。
　　　　　　　We　encountered　other　boats　before　we　were　halfway　there。　A　hastily　organized　flotilla　of　fishing　vessels　laden　with　soldiers　hailed　us。　The　King…in…Waiting　had　sent　them；　at　Justin's　urgently　Skilled　behest。　They　seemed　almost　disappointed　to　find　that　the　fighting　was　over；　but　our　master　assured　them　they　would　be　weled　at　the　tower。　That；　I　think；　was　when　I　realized　I　could　no　longer　sense　Verity。　And　hadn't　for　some　time。　I　groped　after　Nighteyes　immediately；　as　another　man　might　grope　after　his　purse。　He　was　there。　But　distant。　Exhausted；　and　awed。　Never　have　I　smelled　so　much　blood；　he　told　me。　I　agreed。　I　still　stank　of　it。
　　　　　　　Verity　had　been　busy。　We　were　scarcely　off　the　Rurisk　before　there　was　another　crew　aboard　to　take　her　back　to　Antler　Island　Tower。　Watch　soldiers　and　another　crew　of　rowers　set　her　heavy　in　the　water。　Verity's　prize　would　be　tied　up　at　his　home　dock　by　this　night。　Another　open　boat　followed　them；　to　bring　our　slain　home。　The　master；　the　mate；　and　Justin　departed　on　provided　horses　to　report　directly　to　Verity。　I　felt　only　relief　that　I　hadn't　been　summoned　also。　Instead；　I　went　with　my　crew　mates。　Faster　than　I　would　have　thought　possible；　word　of　the　battle　and　our　prize　spread　through　Buckkeep　Town。　There　was　not　a　tavern　that　was　not　anxious　to　pour　us　full　of　ale　and　hear　our　exploits。　It　was　almost　like　a　second　battle　frenzy；　for　wherever　we　went；　folk　ignited　around　us　with　savage　satisfaction　in　what　we　had　done。　I　felt　drunk　on　the　surging　emotions　of　those　around　me　long　before　the　ale　overwhelmed　me。　Not　that　I　held　back　from　that。　I　told　few　tales　of　what　we　had　done；　but　my　drinking　more　than　made　up　for　it。　I　threw　up　twice；　once　in　an　alley；　and　later　in　the　street。　I　drank　more　to　kill　the　taste　of　the　vomit。　Somewhere　in　the　back　of　my　mind；　Nighteyes　was　frantic。　Poison。　That　water　is　poisoned。　I　couldn't　frame　a　thought　to　reassure　him。
　　　　　　　Sometime　before　morning；　Burrich　hauled　me　out　of　a　tavern。　He　was　stonily　sober；　and　his　eyes　were　anxious。　In　the　street　outside　the　tavern；　he　stopped　by　a　dying　torch　in　a　street　sconce。　〃There's　still　blood　on　your　face；〃　he　told　me；　and　stood　me　up　straight。　He　took　out　his　handkerchief；　dipped　it　in　a　rain　barrel；　and　wiped　my　face　as　he　had　not　since　I　was　a　child。　I　swayed　under　his　touch。　I　looked　into　his　eyes　and　forced　my　gaze　to　focus。
　　　　　　　〃I've　killed　before；〃　I　said　helplessly。　〃Why　is　this　so　different？　Why　does　it　sicken　me　like　this；　afterward？〃
　　　　　　　〃Because　it　does；〃　he　said　softly。　He　put　an　arm　around　my　shoulders；　and　I　was　surprised　we　were　of　a　height。　The　walk　back　to　Buckkeep　was　steep