the professor(教授)-第34节
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detracting from my merit； justify my veracity。
Know； O incredulous reader！ that a master stands in a
somewhat different relation towards a pretty； light…headed；
probably ignorant girl； to that occupied by a partner at a ball； or a
gallant on the promenade。 A professor does not meet his pupil to
see her dressed in satin and muslin； with hair perfumed and
curled； neck scarcely shaded by aerial lace； round white arms
circled with bracelets； feet dressed for the gliding dance。 It is not
his business to whirl her through the waltz； to feed her with
compliments； to heighten her beauty by the flush of gratified
vanity。 Neither does he encounter her on the smooth…rolled； tree
shaded Boulevard； in the green and sunny park； whither she
repairs clad in her becoming walking dress； her scarf thrown with
grace over her shoulders； her little bonnet scarcely screening her
curls； the red rose under its brim adding a new tint to the softer
rose on her cheek； her face and eyes； too； illumined with smiles；
perhaps as transient as the sunshine of the gala…day； but also quite
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as brilliant； it is not his office to walk by her side； to listen to her
lively chat； to carry her parasol； scarcely larger than a broad green
leaf； to lead in a ribbon her Blenheim spaniel or Italian
greyhound。 No： he finds her in the schoolroom； plainly dressed；
with books before her。 Owing to her education or her nature books
are to her a nuisance； and she opens them with aversion； yet her
teacher must instil into her mind the contents of these books； that
mind resists the admission of grave information； it recoils； it grows
restive； sullen tempers are shown； disfiguring frowns spoil the
symmetry of the face； sometimes coarse gestures banish grace
from the deportment； while muttered expressions； redolent of
native and ineradicable vulgarity； desecrate the sweetness of the
voice。 Where the temperament is serene though the intellect be
sluggish； an unconquerable dullness opposes every effort to
instruct。 Where there is cunning but not energy； dissimulation；
falsehood； a thousand schemes and tricks are put in play to evade
the necessity of application； in short； to the tutor； female youth；
female charms are like tapestry hangings； of which the wrong side
is continually turned towards him； and even when he sees the
smooth； neat external surface he so well knows what knots； long
stitches； and jagged ends are behind that he has scarce a
temptation to admire too fondly the seemly forms and bright
colours exposed to general view。
Our likings are regulated by our circumstances。 The artist
prefers a hilly country because it is picturesque； the engineer a flat
one because it is convenient； the man of pleasure likes what he
calls “a fine woman”—she suits him； the fashionable young
gentleman admires the fashionable young lady—she is of his kind；
the toil…worn； fagged； probably irritable tutor； blind almost to
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beauty； insensible to airs and graces； glories chiefly in certain
mental qualities： application； love of knowledge； natural capacity；
docility； truthfulness； gratefulness； are the charms that attract his
notice and win his regard。 These he seeks； but seldom meets；
these； if by chance he finds； he would fain retain for ever； and
when separation deprives him of them he feels as if some ruthless
hand had snatched from him his only ewe…lamb。 Such being the
case； and the ease it is； my readers will agree with me that there
was nothing either very meritorious or very marvellous in the
integrity and moderation of my conduct at Mdlle Reuter’s
pensionnat de demoiselles。
My first business this afternoon consisted in reading the list of
places for the month； determined by the relative correctness of the
compositions given the preceding day。 The list was headed； as
usual； by the name of Sylvie； that plain； quiet little girl I have
described before as being at once the best and ugliest pupil in the
establishment； the second place had fallen to the lot of a certain
Léonie Ledru； a diminutive； sharp…featured； and parchment…
skinned creature of quick wits； frail conscience； and indurated
feelings； a lawyer…like thing； of whom I used to say that； had she
been a boy； she would have made a model of an unprincipled；
clever attorney。 Then came Eulalie； the proud beauty； the Juno of
the school； whom six long years of drilling in the simple grammar
of the English language had compelled； despite the stiff phlegm of
her intellect； to acquire a mechanical acquaintance with most of its
rules。 No smile； no trace of pleasure or satisfaction appeared in
Sylvie’s nun…like and passive face as she heard her name read
first。 I always felt saddened by the sight of that poor girl’s absolute
quiescence on all occasions； and it was my custom to look at her；
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to address her； as seldom as possible； her extreme docility； her
assiduous perseverance； would have recommended her warmly to
my good opinion； her modesty； her intelligence； would have
induced me to feel most kindly—most affectionately towards her；
notwithstanding the almost ghastly plainness of her features； the
disproportion of her form； the corpse…like lack of animation in her
countenance； had I not been aware that every friendly word； every
kindly action； would be reported by her to her confessor； and by
him misinterpreted and poisoned。 Once I laid my hand on her
head； in token of approbation； I thought Sylvie was going to smile；
her dim eye almost kindled； but； presently； she shrank from me； I
was a man and a heretic； she； poor child！ a destined nun and
devoted Catholic： thus a four…fold wall of separation divided her
mind from mine。 A pert smirk； and a hard glance of triumph； was
Léonie’s method of testifying her gratification； Eulalie looked
sullen and envious—she had hoped to be first。 Hortense and
Caroline exchanged a reckless grimace on hearing their names
read out somewhere near the bottom of the list； the brand of
mental inferiority was considered by them as no disgrace； their
hopes for the future being based solely on their personal
attractions。
This affair arranged； the regular lesson followed。 During a brief
interval； employed by the pupils in ruling their books； my eye；
ranging carelessly over the benches； observed； for the first time；
that the farthest seat in the farthest row—a seat usually vacant—
was again filled by the new scholar； the Mdlle Henri so
ostentatiously recommended to me by the directress。 To…day I had
on my spectacles； her appearance； therefore； was clear to me at
the first glance； I had not to puzzle over it。 She looked young； yet；
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had I been required to name her exact age； I should have been
somewhat nonplussed； the slightness of her figure might have
