a hero of our time-第13节

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I　must　now　give　some　explanation　of　the　reasons　which　have　induced　me　to　betray　to　the　public　the　inmost　secrets　of　a　man　whom　I　never　knew。　　If　I　had　even　been　his　friend；　well　and　good：　the　artful　indiscretion　of　the　true　friend　is　intelligible　to　everybody；　but　I　only　saw　Pechorin　once　in　my　life　　on　the　high…road　　and；　consequently；　I　cannot　cherish　towards　him　that　inexplicable　hatred；　which；　hiding　its　face　under　the　mask　of　friendship；　awaits　but　the　death　or　misfortune　of　the　beloved　object　to　burst　over　its　head　in　a　storm　of　reproaches；　admonitions；　scoffs　and　regrets。

On　reading　over　these　notes；　I　have　become　convinced　of　the　sincerity　of　the　man　who　has　so　unsparingly　exposed　to　view　his　own　weaknesses　and　vices。　　The　history　of　a　man's　soul；　even　the　pettiest　soul；　is　hardly　less　interesting　and　useful　than　the　history　of　a　whole　people；　especially　when　the　former　is　the　result　of　the　observations　of　a　mature　mind　upon　itself；　and　has　been　written　without　any　egoistical　desire　of　arousing　sympathy　or　astonishment。　　Rous…　seau's　Confessions　has　precisely　this　defect　　he　read　it　to　his　friends。

And；　so；　it　is　nothing　but　the　desire　to　be　useful　that　has　constrained　me　to　print　fragments　of　this　diary　which　fell　into　my　hands　by　chance。　Although　I　have　altered　all　the　proper　names；　those　who　are　mentioned　in　it　will　probably　recog…　nise　themselves；　and；　it　may　be；　will　find　some　justification　for　actions　for　which　they　have　hitherto　blamed　a　man　who　has　ceased　henceforth　to　have　anything　in　common　with　this　world。　We　almost　always　excuse　that　which　we　under…　stand。

I　have　inserted　in　this　book　only　those　portions　of　the　diary　which　refer　to　Pechorin's　sojourn　in　the　Caucasus。　　There　still　remains　in　my　hands　a　thick　writing…book　in　which　he　tells　the　story　of　his　whole　life。　　Some　time　or　other　that；　too；　will　present　itself　before　the　tribunal　of　the　world；　but；　for　many　and　weighty　reasons；　I　do　not　venture　to　take　such　a　responsibility　upon　myself　now。

Possibly　some　readers　would　like　to　know　my　own　opinion　of　Pechorin's　character。　　My　answer　is：　the　title　of　this　book。　　〃But　that　is　malicious　irony！〃　they　will　say。　。　。　　I　know　not。



BOOK　III　THE　FIRST　EXTRACT　FROM　PECHORIN'S　DIARY

TAMAN

TAMAN　is　the　nastiest　little　hole　of　all　the　seaports　of　Russia。　I　was　all　but　starved　　there；　to　say　nothing　of　having　a　narrow　escape　of　being　drowned。

I　arrived　late　at　night　by　the　post…car。　The　driver　stopped　the　tired　troika＇1＇　at　the　gate　of　the　only　stone…built　house　that　stood　at　the　entrance　to　the　town。　The　sentry；　a　Cossack　from　the　Black　Sea；　hearing　the　jingle　of　the　bell；　cried　out；　sleepily；　in　his　barbarous　voice；　〃Who　goes　there？〃　An　under…officer　of　Cossacks　and　a　headborough＇2＇　came　out。　I　explained　that　I　was　an　officer　bound　for　the　active…service　detachment　on　Government　business；　and　I　proceeded　to　demand　official　quarters。　The　headborough　conducted　us　round　the　town。　Whatever　hut　we　drove　up　to　we　found　to　be　occupied。　The　weather　was　cold；　I　had　not　slept　for　three　nights；　I　was　tired　out；　and　I　began　to　lose　my　temper。

＇1＇　Team　of　three　horses　abreast。

＇2＇　Desyatnik；　a　superintendent　of　ten　（men　or　huts）；　i。e。　an　officer　like　the　old　English　tithing…man　or　headborough。

〃Take　me　somewhere　or　other；　you　scoundrel！〃　I　cried；　〃to　the　devil　himself；　so　long　as　there's　a　place　to　put　up　at！〃

〃There　is　one　other　lodging；〃　answered　the　headborough；　scratching　his　head。　〃Only　you　won't　like　it；　sir。　It　is　uncanny！〃

Failing　to　grasp　the　exact　signification　of　the　last　phrase；　I　ordered　him　to　go　on；　and；　after　a　lengthy　peregrination　through　muddy　byways；　at　the　sides　of　which　I　could　see　nothing　but　old　fences；　we　drove　up　to　a　small　cabin；　right　on　the　shore　of　the　sea。

The　full　moon　was　shining　on　the　little　reed…　thatched　roof　and　the　white　walls　of　my　new　dwelling。　In　the　courtyard；　which　was　sur…　rounded　by　a　wall　of　rubble…stone；　there　stood　another　miserable　hovel；　smaller　and　older　than　the　first　and　all　askew。　The　shore　descended　precipitously　to　the　sea；　almost　from　its　very　walls；　and　down　below；　with　incessant　murmur；　plashed　the　dark…blue　waves。　The　moon　gazed　softly　upon　the　watery　element；　restless　but　obedient　to　it；　and　I　was　able　by　its　light　to　distinguish　two　ships　lying　at　some　distance　from　the　shore；　their　black　rigging　motionless　and　standing　out；　like　cobwebs；　against　the　pale　line　of　the　horizon。

〃There　are　vessels　in　the　harbour；〃　I　said　to　myself。　〃To…morrow　I　will　set　out　for　Gelen…　jik。〃

I　had　with　me；　in　the　capacity　of　soldier…　servant；　a　Cossack　of　the　frontier　army。　Order…　ing　him　to　take　down　the　portmanteau　and　dis…　miss　the　driver；　I　began　to　call　the　master　of　the　house。　No　answer！　I　knocked　　all　was　silent　within！　。　。　。　What　could　it　mean？　At　length　a　boy　of　about　fourteen　crept　out　from　the　hall。

〃Where　is　the　master？〃

〃There　isn't　one。〃

〃What！　No　master？〃

〃None！〃

〃And　the　mistress？〃

〃She　has　gone　off　to　the　village。〃

〃Who　will　open　the　door　for　me；　then？〃　I　said；　giving　it　a　kick。

The　door　opened　of　its　own　accord；　and　a　breath　of　moisture…laden　air　was　wafted　from　the　hut。　I　struck　a　lucifer　match　and　held　it　to　the　boy's　face。　It　lit　up　two　white　eyes。　He　was　totally　blind；　obviously　so　from　birth。　He　stood　stock…still　before　me；　and　I　began　to　examine　his　features。

I　confess　that　I　have　a　violent　prejudice　against　all　blind；　one…eyed；　deaf；　dumb；　legless；　armless；　hunchbacked；　and　such…like　people。　I　have　observed　that　there　is　always　a　certain　strange　connection　between　a　man's　exterior　and　his　soul；　as；　if　when　the　body　loses　a　limb；　the　soul　also　loses　some　power　of　feeling。

And　so　I　began　to　examine　the　blind　boy's　face。　But　what　could　be　read　upon　a　face　from　which　the　eyes　are　missing？。　。　。　For　a　long　time　I　gazed　at　him　with　involuntary　compassion；　when　suddenly　a　scarcely　perceptible　smile　flitted　over　his　thin　lips；　producing；　I　know　not　why；　a　most　unpleasant　impression　upon　me。　I　began　to　feel　a　suspicion　that　the　blind　boy　was　not　so　blind　as　he　appeared　to　be。　In　vain　I　endeavoured　to　convince　myself　that　it　was　impossible　to　counterfeit　cataracts；　and　besides；　what　reason　could　there　be　for　doing　such　a　thing？　But　I　could　not　help　my　sus…　picions。　I　am　easily　swayed　by　prejudice。　。　。

〃You　are　the　master's　son？〃　I　asked　at　length。

〃No。〃

〃Who　are　you；　then？〃

〃An　orphan　　a　poor　boy。〃

〃Has　the　mistress　any　children？〃

〃No；　her　daughter　ran　away　and　crossed　the　sea　with　a　Tartar。〃

〃What　sort　of　a　Tartar？〃

〃The　devil　only　knows！　A　Crimean　Tartar；　a　boatman　from　Kerch。〃

I　entered　the　hut。　Its　whole　furniture　con…　sisted　of　two　benches　and　a　table；　together　with　an　enormous　chest　beside　the　stove。　There　was　not　a　single　ikon　to　be　seen　on　the　wall　　a　bad　sign！　The　sea…wind　burst　in　through　the　broken　window…pane。　I　drew　a　wax　candle…end　from　my　portmanteau；　lit　it；　and　began　to　put　my　things　out。　My　sabre　and　gun　I　placed　in　a　corner；　my　pistols　I　laid　on　the　table。　I　spread　my　felt　cloak　out　on　one　bench；　and　the　Cossack　his　on　the　other。　In　ten　minutes　the　latter　was　snoring；　but　I　could　not　go　to　sleep　　the　image　of　the　boy　with　the　white　eyes　kept　hovering　before　me　in　the　dark。

About　an　hour　passed　thus。　The　moon　shone　in　at　the　window　and　its　rays　played　along　the　earthen　floor　of　the　hut。　Suddenly　a　shadow　flitted　across　the　bright　strip　of　moonshine　which　intersected　the　floor。　I　raised　myself　up　a　little　and　glanced　out　of　the　window。　Again　somebody　ran　by　it　and　disappeared　　goodness　knows　where！　It　seemed　impossible　for　anyone　to　descend　the　steep　cliff　overhanging　the　shore；　but　that　was　the　only　thing　that　could　have　happened。　I　rose；　threw　on　my　tunic；　girded　on　a　dagger；　and　with　the　utmost　quietness　went　out　of　the　hut。　The　blind　boy　was　coming　towards　me。　I　hid　by　the　fence；　and　he　passed　by　me　with　a　sure　but　cautious　step。　He　was　carrying　a　parcel　under　his　arm。　He　turned　towards　the　harbour　and　began　to　descend　a　steep　and　narrow　path。

〃On　that　day　the　dumb　will　cry　out　and　the　blind　will　see；〃　I　said　to　myself；　following　him　just　close　enough　to　keep　him　in　sight。

Meanwhile　the　moon　was　becoming　overcast　by　clouds　and　a　mist　had　risen　upon　the　sea。　The　lantern　alight　in　the　stern　of　a　ship　close　at　hand　was　scarcely　visible　through　the　mist；　and　by　the　shore　there　glimmered　the　foam　of　the　waves；　which　every　moment　threatened　to　submerge　it。　Descending　with　difficulty；　I　stole　along　the　steep　declivity；　and　all　at　once　I　saw　the　blind　boy　come　to　a　standstill　and　then　turn　down　to　the　right。　He　walked　so　close　to　the　water's　edge　that　it　seemed　as　if　the　waves　would　straight…　way　seize　him　and　carry　him　off。　But；　judging　by　the　confidence　with　which　he　stepped　from　rock　to　rock　and　avoided　the　water…channels；　this　was　evidently　not　the　first　time　that　he　had　made　that　journey。　Finally　he　stopped；　as　though　listening　for　something；　squatted　down　upon　the　ground；　and　laid　the　parcel　beside　him。　Concealing　myself　behind　a　projecting　rock　on　the　shore；　I　kept　watch　on　his　movements。　After　a　few　minutes　a　white　figure　made　its　appearance　from　the　opposite　direction。　It　came　up　to　the　blind　boy　and　sat　down　beside　him。　At　times　the　wind　wafted